How the Narcissist’s Mind Works During a Crisis: Since the narcissist draws on a great deal of the narcissist’s supply to function, how do you think he or she copes when there is an absolute dearth of it?
My heart goes out to all of you who are dealing with a narcissist during this pandemic, which is why I so excitedly wanted to connect with you today on this topic!
Narcissists need a regular amount of narcissistic supply, so what happens when the narcissist cannot go about the narcissistic business as usual due to uncontrollable events?
In this episode, I explain to you how self-isolation and job loss can take their toll on their minds and affect co-parenting. In addition, how to protect yourself from bad tactics that can affect you and your children.
Inner gnawing shock
There are some people who find it difficult to spend time alone without distractions. This is always for the same reason, because it is difficult to find peace with your inner being.
Narcissists take this discomfort to an extreme. The reason for this is that narcissists have ignored their true inner selves. They believe that this inner identity is not enough to deal with life. This is why the false self has been built and activated in its place.
This false self is always hungry. The narcissist needs the regular hit of the narcissist’s supply – which means attention (be it good or bad makes no difference) from external forces to be able to enhance the narcissist’s feelings of self-importance.
The problem is that this is a never ending requirement. Since there is no true self in command, the narcissist is cut off from being able to get his or her good feelings directly through the life force/source/awareness, in other words, the higher self.
Therefore, a true and lasting feeling of peace, wholeness and well-being is impossible.
Because of this, the narcissist’s self-destructive inner critic always threatens to emerge, with feedback reminding the narcissist only of how incompetent, broken, flawed, and unacceptable they are.
Narcissistic supply is the drug that the narcissist frantically hunts down and feeds on to numb and escape the truth about it. This is the relentless, lifelong pursuit of a narcissist.
As we’re about to be examined, this situation with COVID-19 makes the narcissist’s supply very difficult to come by.
What does self-isolation mean to a narcissist
Not being able to go out in the world with a narcissist’s supply is a narcissist’s worst nightmare.
In closing, not only is the narcissistic overture difficult to come by, but it also means the narcissist is being “telled what to do.”
Narcissists hate being cooped up. They hate having to follow rules and regulations, way beyond the normal feelings that self-isolation might bring to people.
Narcissists believe they are a law in itself, above blame, and not accountable to anyone. Keeping up with the demands of the rest of the world means they will become just like everyone else.
This is unimaginable for narcissists.
So, what does this time of COVID-19 mean for a narcissist?
Narcissistic being ugly. He or she will suffer horrific narcissistic injuries and constantly draw narcissistic supplies.
What does this mean for you?
This means that the narcissist is likely to lash out, in nasty or manipulative ways that focus on one of two possible agendas – securing the narcissist’s much-needed supply, or/and spilling their own deadly inner wounds all over the place.
Some of you may think, now that this person cannot escape and do whatever they want, that this would bring you closer. However, I can assure you that self-isolation with a narcissist is definitely not the “teamwork” or “teamwork” you hope for.
If you are co-parenting with a narcissist
During this time of coronavirus, many of you have reported very frustrating struggles with narcissists.
Of course, you get excited about whether this person is isolating themselves or doing the right thing by your child.
The answer is, they probably weren’t.
This is where you need to get back to the absolute truth of how to deal with a narcissist.
The more you try to convince the narcissist to do the right thing, the more the narcissist will do the wrong thing – simply because it takes away too much of the narcissistic supply (attention) from you.
You know I always say the same thing, and right now, it’s more important than ever – I can’t recommend enough that you break away, continue to let go of the trauma you feel rekindling inside of you and do everything you can to be a complete, safe, healthy parent when your child is. with you.
This is only possible when you can get rid of these feelings of intense irritation and outburst. In addition, what you will find is that the narcissist will stop a lot of the behavior and ways in which he has been harming you and your child when they are not receiving any narcissistic supply from you.
Here’s the thing about narcissists, the energy that is expended to get the narcissistic show-off means there must be a reward for continuing it. If there is no reward, the narcissist will focus on getting a narcissistic supply from somewhere else.
As many of you have discovered, my NARP is a powerful and effective way to get to this level of separation.
Related: The 4 Traits of A Narcissist Magnet. Are You One?
A intense hoover time
Narcissists stuck with themselves, without the drama and distractions and frantic energy of the world, they are very low on narcissistic supply.
However, we know with technology being what it is, it’s very capable of reaching out to people, past and present, to try and hook them up for an active feed again.
It is very important that if you finish with a narcissist and focus on your recovery, that you prevent him or her. Don’t allow the hoover to get to you.
If any contact is necessary, such as in the case of a property settlement or joint custody, set up external contacts such as an attorney or the great Parenting tool Our Family Wizard.
These steps allow you to have strong boundaries around yourself, your soul, and your life. This means, “I am no longer available as a snack when you need nourishment!”
Tagging by a narcissist is not a compliment!
To the narcissist, you are just an object, and there to give your terribly insecure ego a blow to help give the narcissist importance. This comes at a terrible price for you. Because of your use, there is no real care for you, regret for what happened, or intention to give you a healthy or happy behavior in the future.
You are only necessary to them so they can drain you for their energy needs, and then when they’re done, they’ll likely dump you and throw you into the gutter as you were last time.
It is very important that you understand this so as not to go there.
Related: What is Narcissistic Abuse: 16 Signs To Identify And How To Protect
If the narcissist loses his job
It is likely that you will be blamed, or the narcissist will tug on your heart strings to get you to support them financially. Or just your fault or your demand to do so.
Or, the narcissist will jump ship to a better deal that will provide what the narcissist needs to get rid of his false self again.
It is unlikely that you will deal with a stable, calm, resourceful, adaptable person who takes personal responsibility for his life.
Compose yourself against a narcissist in crisis
My heart goes out to all of you who are dealing with a narcissist during this pandemic. I know the suffering you are going through is indescribable.
But still, this is a great opportunity to level up, even if it is difficult to do.
It is very true that, in times of disaster, we have the courage and the driving force to achieve our greatest growth. Because we need to!
I know there are many of you in this amazing community who are truly immersed in your deep inner work and are coming out stronger and stronger against the narcissist as a result.
In many cases, this is despite whatever the narcissist is trying to throw at you.
Related: The 5 Wants Of A Narcissist
I’m very proud of you!
For those of you who do not yet know how this can be achieved, and cannot even imagine getting there, I promise you with all my heart that it is possible and that you can achieve it.
And I am fully committed to helping you achieve that.
To help you do this, I am opening another free master class, which I know is really in demand at this time.
It’s April 29th. In this special event, I share with you the real processes for finding relief, regaining your power and breaking free from any narcissist in your life, no matter how much damage they have caused you.
Even in spite of the predicament you may be in right now.
Please know that if you are unable to make this event live, you will receive a recording as a result of your subscription, which you can watch and listen to at your convenience, in the comfort of your own home.