If there is one underrated personality trait of narcissists, it is that they are exceptional actors.

Their acting skills are so superior, they are able to fool everyone around them.

They are the most confident, courageous, and bold people on the planet. But is this true? Or what are narcissists’ greatest fears?

In reality, they are driven by underlying feelings of shame and vulnerability, which are masked by an inflated personality.

Narcissists are not born this way; it is not a natural aspect of their personality. Narcissism develops as a result of a childhood in which important developmental milestones are neglected.

A secure sense of self-identity is never established. As adults, they build towering walls around their true selves and rely on a carefully crafted image as a form of psychological and emotional survival.

Whether you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, or you have a friend, family member, boss, or coworker with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, being associated with someone with these personality traits is stressful.

As you may have experienced, they have the powerful ability to strip away your self-esteem and make you feel unworthy.

When you understand what makes a narcissist tick, you can take back your power and, if you want, make them run in the opposite direction when they see you coming.

But what are narcissists afraid of and, more importantly, how do you make a narcissist afraid of you? Here are twelve things that will scare narcissists away.

1 They Fear Rejection

What makes narcissists panic? What makes them feel miserable? Rejection is the first answer.

Narcissists despise rejection. It destabilizes them and drives them crazy. They work exceptionally hard to maintain appearances; inside, they feel unloved and inferior.

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Any form of rejection, whether professional, personal, or social, sends them on a warpath.

A narcissist’s life revolves around playing the rejector. When they feel like control has been relinquished, they will do everything they can to regain it.

Narcissists will never say they feel rejected because of something you said or did.

Instead, they will use every tactic in the book from revenge to threats to guilt trips. They have also been known to resort to public humiliation as a form of revenge.

2 They Fear Humiliation and Embarrassment

Because of their inflated and overly sensitive nature, narcissists are incapable of thinking logically.

Their expectations are so unrealistic that even the most senseless insults threaten them.

No one invites humiliation or embarrassment into their lives; however, narcissists’ emotional instability makes them exceptionally vulnerable to such feelings.

To protect themselves from these feelings, narcissists put themselves in a dominant position by humiliating and embarrassing those around them.

3 They Fear Failure

Narcissists thrive on perfection; they have deluded themselves into believing that they are perfect human beings and can do no wrong.

The slightest hint of failure is an indication that they are less than perfect in some way.

The internal failure they can deal with is because narcissists lie to themselves so much that they believe their own lies.

But when narcissists build an entire image around a perceived ideal nature and are unable to hide or camouflage failure, narcissists feel as though their sense of self has been destroyed.

It is natural for a person to hate failure, but it is also a powerful tool for growth when a person is able to learn from their mistakes.

But to turn failure into something positive, an individual is required to evaluate themselves, and this is something most narcissists will never do unless they reach a point in life where they are ready to change.

4 They Hate Exposure

Emotionally healthy individuals are aware of and proud of who they are.

They pride themselves on revealing their true nature to others. In most cases, they are on a continuous journey of self-improvement that involves self-reflection and personal accountability.

Emotionally healthy individuals enjoy closeness with their friends, family, and loved ones; part of this closeness involves having the freedom to be their authentic selves around them.

On the other hand, narcissists fear revealing themselves; therefore, they avoid self-esteem and see closeness as a threat.

Ironically, the dominant image of a narcissist is that of someone admiring themselves in the mirror, while the reality is that they are constantly running away from their true identity. They are strangers to themselves.

Narcissists constantly try to deny and avoid their weaknesses by surrounding themselves with illusions of superiority.

The only thing they value more than convincing themselves of their false sense of self-worth is convincing others of it.

Because of their deep insecurities, they rely heavily on how others perceive them.

They need constant praise and admiration, and if that does not happen, they find it difficult to function.

So narcissists have become experts at convincing everyone around them to support and believe the person they portray and the narrative surrounding them.

5 They Hate Expressing Gratitude

The process of gratitude involves connecting with your feelings and acknowledging that you are grateful for something.

Expressing gratitude for the beauty of nature means that they are grateful to the entity that created it.

Expressing gratitude to someone for something they have helped them with means that they are grateful to that individual for what they have done.

Whether it is dealing with a higher power or a person, gratitude for narcissists makes them feel grateful for whatever it is they are grateful for.

In addition, because the condition is rooted in a sense of entitlement, they believe that they deserve special treatment and attention. They should be recognized and appreciated for their superiority, not the other way around.

For example, when a narcissist goes on vacation and leaves their cat with a friend or family member.

Upon his return, instead of expressing gratitude to this person for taking the time to care for his cat, the narcissist expects him to thank him for the privilege of doing him a favor. To the average person, this behavior is unacceptable. But this form of manipulation is inherent in the narcissist’s personality.

Remind them that they are not immortal if you want to know how to make a narcissist suffer.

8 They Hate Feeling Regret

Again, regret is an emotion, and narcissists are afraid to be associated with their emotions.

Furthermore, they hate admitting they are wrong in any way, and feeling remorse means they are forced to admit they made a mistake.

Everyone finds it difficult to apologize, even when we know we are wrong.

However, the narcissist is so committed to their self-importance and idealistic nature that they cannot make a mistake.

Even when presented with concrete evidence of their wrongdoing, the narcissist will find a way to twist and manipulate the situation, so that they are not forced into a vulnerable position.

9 They Fear Being Humiliated and Offended

No one likes to be humiliated; however, the average person can take negative criticism with a grain of salt and continue to do so because they feel secure in themselves.

When you know who you are and what you stand for, there’s not much anyone can say to chip away at your self-esteem.

This is not the case with narcissists. Deep down, they feel terribly insecure and if what you say about them doesn’t match their fantasy self, it hurts immensely.

It’s also important to note that narcissists tend to take things out of context because they’re always looking for information to confirm their true feelings.

For example, if you tell your narcissistic partner that you think a white shirt looks better than a black one.

They’ll respond with something like, “So you’re saying I look fat in this?” Because deep down, they believe they’re overweight.

When narcissists feel they’ve been humiliated, they’ll grumble and brood about it for days on end.

If they are truly offended, they may never get over it and look for ways to get back at the person who offended them.

10 They are afraid to take responsibility

A common trait among narcissists is their inability to take responsibility for their actions.

You can be sure that someone else will take the blame when something goes wrong. They are adept at twisting the truth, everyone is crazy except them.

Accusations often lead to narcissistic rage, and this includes them attacking their victim, which is one of the many power moves they use to intimidate and subjugate people.

In most cases, you will never get narcissists to accept responsibility; however, when you refuse to take the blame for their mistakes, they do not like it at all.

If you catch your partner in the act of putting their hands inside a cookie jar, they will argue vehemently that what you are seeing is false evidence that appears to be real.

A mentally healthy person feels good when they take responsibility, and narcissists find this difficult because they do not like feeling vulnerable.

Related : How to Respond to a Narcissist’s Apology?

If you want to know how to make a narcissist afraid of you, hold them personally accountable for their actions.

11 They are afraid of losing control

Narcissists love control, there is an ulterior motive behind everything they say and do, if they verbally abuse you and you don’t respond, it terrifies them.

One of the most effective ways to disarm a narcissist is to respond rather than react.

Narcissists keep their victims in a state of hypervigilance. They are unpredictable, and you never know what they will do from one moment to the next.

They are puppet masters, and you are their victim. When the narcissist says jump, and you respond with something other than “how high,” they panic.

12 They Fear Not Being the Center of Attention

Want to know what makes narcissists panic? Giving your full attention to someone else. This is one of the many things narcissists hate.

Narcissists need to be the center of attention at all times. If they are not, it shatters their false sense of self-worth.

A prime example of this is when you are at a social event with your narcissistic partner; the guest casually mentions a personal accomplishment.

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You are impressed and begin to focus your attention on them.

Saying things like, “Wow, that’s great,” or “You’ve done a really good job for yourself; your parents should be so proud.”

It will destroy the narcissist because they are not the focus of the conversation. You can compare it to dousing them with a bucket of cold water—it’s a complete shock to the system.

How to Make a Narcissist Afraid of You? Final Thoughts

So how do you make a narcissist afraid of you? It’s important to note that making a narcissist afraid of you isn’t about devaluing them or trying to get revenge.

It’s about taking power away from the narcissist. In many cases, narcissists are friends, family members, and coworkers, and getting away from them is no easy task.

However, you can get them to free you from their clutches by exploiting their fears.

In this way, you can love them from a distance without having to deal with the emotional pain of being in a close relationship with a narcissist.