This Is How Narcissists Wear Out Their Welcome

Narcissists feed off the energy of the people around them. They crave status and work hard to achieve it, but do they actually succeed in getting the status they want?

Narcissists may not have actual status, but may only believe they have status within the group.

This issue was explored in a paper published in the July 2015 issue of Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin by Erika Carlson and Nicole Lawless Desjardins. They examined the status and popularity of people in small groups, both immediately and over four months.

Their first study focused on first impressions. They had small groups interact for 10 minutes. After interacting, participants rated the status and popularity of everyone in the group, including themselves. Later, participants also rated their personality characteristics and filled out the Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), which is frequently used in studies as a measure of narcissism.

Participants who scored higher on the NPI tended to have higher status after this brief interaction than those who scored lower. These individuals also correctly realized that they had a higher status. People who scored higher on the NPI were not more popular than other group members; However, they considered themselves more popular than they actually were.

In a second study, participants were part of a semester-long college class. They interacted together in the same small group throughout the entire semester. Over the course of the semester, personality scales and the NPI are introduced. Also, three times during the semester participants rated the status and popularity of each group member and themselves.

Again, people with higher NPI scores tend to have a higher status than those with low scores at the beginning of the semester. But their standing declined over the course of the season; By the end of the semester, they had a level of status in the middle of the pack. Those who scored high on the NPI were also aware that they started with a high status and that their status declined over the course of the semester.

In this study, the NPI did not predict individuals’ popularity during the semester, but there was a tendency for people who scored high on the NPI to believe they were somewhat more popular than they actually were.

Why is this happening? The researchers also conducted a survey of people asking them which behaviors they thought increased their status in the group. People who score low on the NPI tend to list behaviors in which they treat others well.

People who scored high on the NPI tended to list behaviors that caught their attention, such as being arrogant or pointing out others’ weaknesses. These more aggressive behaviors may actually bring people status in the short term, but this status tends to erode in the long term.