Narcissistic people are everywhere, but do you seem to keep finding them all and falling into one toxic relationship after another? If you want to know the rules of attraction that will make you someone free of narcissistic behavior or you notice signs of a toxic relationship after a few months of meeting a new man, there are some patterns in your love life that you need to pay attention to. Attraction simply works in love and relationships, and the rules of attraction are as follows: What you give to the world you will receive back into your life. Narcissists will show you signs of attraction very early on, so you may not realize it’s a toxic relationship until it’s too late.

But what if there was a reason you kept falling in love with these people? Do you seem to attract the same type of person – narcissistic or uncommitted – or do your relationships have a similar feel where you only know how to attract men who are bad for you? It is not uncommon for people to notice that they always attract addicts, narcissists, or emotionally abusive men.

It becomes difficult for them to imagine meeting someone different – a suitable, healthy partner with whom they can thrive in a long and prosperous relationship. An important part of knowing how to change negative patterns is exploring why they keep happening. Next, he develops an action plan to do differently. Looking at your “why” helps you gain the necessary self-awareness and insight into why you might be attracted to and accepting of unavailable and emotionally unsuitable partners. Many reasons lie in your subconscious mind below the level of consciousness.

Here are 3 ways you can attract toxic men:

Explore your early family history

How was your parents’ marriage? Do your romantic partners have negative traits of either of your parents? Has there been a steady and reliable person in your life? Do you suffer from chaos or abuse? When you were a child, were you given adult responsibilities? Think about how these early relationships and communication styles with your family influence your partner’s choices. There is often a level of comfort or familiarity about it that feels normal in a romantic relationship even if on some level you know it’s unhealthy or making you unhappy.

Explore topics related to your love life and dating

Write down every important romantic relationship you’ve had. Include ones that were short but perhaps intense or ones that you were infatuated with, but the feelings weren’t mutual. Include anything you think is important. Write down the general characteristics of each partner. Also, think about how each relationship ended. Are there similarities and themes you notice about the relationship or individual? What does this information tell you?

Acknowledge your contribution to the dynamics of the relationship

Do you tend to be overly anxious or insecure? Are you creating drama or chaos in your life? Are you playing the victim? Can potentially healthy relationships be sabotaged? You may have traits and behaviors that perpetuate these patterns as well. You should also look at your expectations in relationships, realizing that believing in a perfect union or “soulmate” will lead to disappointment. If you only blame your partners, you may not fully understand how you got stuck in the first place. Insight without behavior change is useless. Therefore, knowing how you will act differently once you get this new information about yourself is crucial.

Here are 3 ways you can stop attracting the wrong kind of love:

Take a positive and careful approach to dating

Look at dating as “meeting another human being” and nothing else. If there’s a spark, that’s great, but you still don’t want to get your hopes up about this person you just met. Slow down and think about what is essential: similar values, compatible life goals, no obvious red flags, etc. Never rush into a romantic relationship. If it was meant to happen, you wouldn’t get ghosted or treated poorly just because you took it slowly.

We believe you deserve a loving relationship where you are treated well (even if you don’t feel it yet)

People tend to have what is called “confirmation bias.” This is your tendency to interpret new evidence or information as confirmation of your existing beliefs. For example, if you believe that you are not worthy of love, you will filter out information that tells you that you are worthy of love and instead accept evidence that supports this negative opinion. This bias is dangerous and will keep you stuck in the same patterns. If you start recognizing the positive information you’ve been ignoring, you may start to change the way you view yourself.

Focus on what you can effectively change, control, and fix

Someone else doesn’t fall into this category! You can’t change the past either, but you can learn and grow from it. You can make better decisions in the future. You can rewrite your life story, which now includes partners who are consistent, reliable, emotionally engaged, and trustworthy. You can also enjoy a fulfilling and meaningful life with or without a romantic partner. Science tells us that we are hardwired to repeat problematic behavior. This is a psychological and physiological motivation to solve the problem once and for all. The obvious anxiety is when you apply the same solution over and over again after seeing that it didn’t work the first time.

Discovering new solutions and patterns requires conscious effort, otherwise your brain will continue to fire the neural pathway it has always had. This applies to many things you do, and why habits are so hard to change. Your love life is not exempt from this fact. This is also why you repeat patterns even when they cause you pain and do not help you. When you try a new relationship strategy, it may feel strange and uncomfortable, but this should provide some confirmation that you are moving in the right direction.

Here are 3 ways you can attract toxic men:

Here are 3 ways you can stop attracting the wrong kind of love:

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