Admit it or not, many of us strive to find our perfect mate, the true love of our lives who completes us. Everyone desires true love in their life, but how many people are willing to work for it? Many want a relationship, but do they know what that means?
In many ways, true love is like getting married or having children. We have romantic fantasies, fueled by society, about these life choices. However, we rarely think – what makes it work? Often, more thought and expense are spent on wedding planning than on marriage planning.
Couples find, once the honeymoon is over, that they know little about each other, or do not share common values. Likewise, the idea of having a baby feels like laughter and trips to the park. This dies when you have triplets, your baby has colic, won’t take a bottle, or has special needs. However, this is being a parent. But it’s a shock if you don’t think about it and commit to it beforehand.
These life choices, while great, are also functional. Most things are of value. Every day, couples get divorced. Every day, vulnerable children are ignored or worse, mistreated – because the responsibility inherent in marriage and parenthood was not appreciated before it was shouldered.
Loving and being loved positively and healthily is not easy. True love means saying “no” to urges. True love means being mindful rather than hurtful, being helpful rather than selfish, acknowledging your partner’s needs, and being loyal. True love includes actions big and small. Because love is an action, love is an action, and love is a decision.
It doesn’t take effort to be in a dysfunctional relationship. People always do that. Oh, the boredom of taking another emotional hostage, or of allowing yourself the same. It may be chaos, drama and doom, but it’s familiar.
But, to love someone who truly loves you is to be healthy, supportive, and caring. It is partnership, compromise and acceptance. True true love swells while dysfunctional love contracts. However, what swells comes with work and responsibility to oneself and to one another.
There are things you can do that almost guarantee success:
- To find the right person, you have to be the right person.
You are both in or there is no one. If one partner wants to change and the other doesn’t, it’s not a relationship anymore.
Before the relationship, build your life. What went wrong in your last relationship? What patterns and habits do you need to address? Understand it before getting into a new one.
If you’re in a relationship and both of you are trying to save it, you — both of you — figure it out and heal the wounds. Treatment is a good start. And you are both engaged or there is no one. If one partner wants to change and the other doesn’t, it’s not a relationship anymore.
Read : What Is Platonic Love? 4 Aspects of A Platonic Relationship
- Know your limits.
Is it A Deal Affair? What is unprincipled? Take drugs? Excessive drinking? dishonesty? Financial instability? racial slur? Emotional, verbal, or any other abuse? Know before you enter.
Once you know your deal breaker, be ready to move on. It’s not about losing the other person, it’s about not losing yourself. And by the way, men and women: Emotional, verbal, physical, or sexual abuse is one deal breaker. A person who treats you this way is not likely to change, and even worse. It is not your problem to solve it. I continue.
If you stay out of any of these allowances, you’re lying to yourself. You will again fall into a state of dysfunction, bargaining for less than you want and, most certainly, less than you deserve.
Read : Reality Check: Debunking Love at First Sight – 4 Mind Tricks Explained
- True love is healthy communication.
Do you want to be with someone who calls you names? Or blame you for things that bother you? Me, no. When you talk to your partner, start with “I feel” or “I think” statements, and be with those who do the same. There is a game in dysfunctional relationships. Healthy relationships are not games. If you feel like you’re in a game, the way to win is not to play. - True love means goals and desires, both for you and as a couple.
Find out what your partner wants in and out of life and support them.
Find out what you’ve always wanted to do – and do it. Find out what your partner wants in and out of life and support them. Decide, early on, if you can and will support each other. You want to be happy, you want your partner to be happy, and you want to be happy together. Get to this early or you will be disappointed and disappointed. You only live once, so make the most of it.
- Be proactive in all of your relationships.
Make up your mind about relationships and friendships—even those with relatives—and don’t let friendships or professional connections just happen, or reach out if they no longer meet your needs or violate your boundaries.
Be loving, respectful, honest, and open. Choose people who know that trust is earned and that once broken, it may be impossible to get it back. Those who make you guess how they feel about you don’t feed your soul, they drain it.
- You are not a victim.
You have control over your life. People stuck in unhealthy relationship dynamics—myself included when I was—stuck in denial and rationalization. Call yourself on your excuses. Stop believing them. Disengage from the need for pity.
Do you tell yourself or others stories about being used to try to evoke sympathy? Stop. The victim is not attractive to healthy people. Not only that, you are not a victim. You are in control. Take it.
- Vivez avec un but.
Passez du temps tranquille seul chaque jour sans interruption. Pensez à ce dont vous avez besoin dans la vie pour vous sentir mieux ou pour faire un meilleur travail. Qu’est-ce que vous manque? Vous n’êtes pas obligé de méditer formellement à moins que vous ne le vouliez, mais restez calme. Entrez à l’intérieur sans distraction. Vous pouvez être quelqu’un qui fait bouger les choses ou quelqu’un qui fait bouger les choses. comme tu veux
Vivre avec un but, c’est faire les choses difficiles, puis en récolter les fruits. Lorsque vous vous asseyez avec vos sentiments au lieu de les aborder, de regarder la télévision sans réfléchir ou de boire cinq pintes de bière, vous pouvez les traverser, les comprendre et les traiter.
Lorsque vous allez au gymnase pour vous ressourcer, soulager votre anxiété et vous renforcer, vous vous offrez un cadeau incommensurable. Lorsque vous mangez sainement pour alimenter votre corps, vous pouvez être présent à l’esprit, au corps et à l’esprit pour votre famille, vos amis, votre partenaire et vous-même.
It’s also important, when you’re in a relationship, to maintain this practice, as tempting as it may be to spend all of your time with your new love. We all need me time. You will find that you have more to offer your partner when you give to yourself as well.
- True love never hurts.
True love helps you in life, not what makes life more difficult.
Loving relationships are consistent. There will always be times of unintended hurt or frustration, even with those who truly love you. that’s life; No one can meet all your needs. A comment might be taken the wrong way, your partner might be struggling with something — there are countless reasons for hiccups.
It’s not always smooth sailing, but if you work at it, it works. True love helps you in life, not what makes life more difficult. Love is support in a difficult world. Everything in life is not an argument or a challenge. Emotionally healthy people don’t live that way.
- True love loves us as we are and wants us as we are.
One plus one equals two, not one.
If someone asks you to give up interests, hobbies, friends, a job, or anything that makes you who you are, it’s not true love. It is not healthy. It’s normal to nestle in a new relationship, but after a while, you settle down and get back to your routine.
Life is about balance. As life gets busy, you can adjust the amount of time you give to your interests and loved ones, but it’s important to keep your fill, just as your partner does the same. One plus one equals two, not one.
Read : 11 Signs He is A Partner For Life
- Finally, true love is an act of yours and yours.
Act on it and insist on it. Every day, whether in a relationship or not, affirm that love is what you do, not what you say. And you ask. For relationships other than love, such as those you have with friends, coworkers, and even acquaintances, respect is the act you take, and the act for you. You deserve to be treated with love and respect. in all of your relationships.
True, true love is work, and when you understand that, you’ll be less likely to get in and out of relationships in which you’ll experience anything but love. Use your time outside the relationship wisely. Build what you need to be in a healthy relationship. And then, go out and do it. And it will be real, true and wonderful.
