If someone is secretly judging you, they’ll display these 10 subtle behaviors

Everyone’s a little judgmental. We can’t help it, it’s just human nature!

Some people make it very obvious when they judge you. These people tend not to be the nicest and kindest souls.

But most people do everything they can to hide the fact that they are judging you.

Sometimes, they’re still a little rough. Other times, they can’t help themselves!

Either way, it’s good to be aware of these things. If someone is secretly judging you, there may be small, subtle signs that reveal it.

Like the following 10!

Up first:

1) They will smile at others while you talk
First, if someone is silently judging you, they may not be the only one.

Judgmental people tend to form a “clique.” That is: a group of people who share a love of judging others!

When you talk to people in this group, the person judging you may smile at someone else in the group.

It will be quick and almost unnoticeable – but it will definitely be judgmental! And a sign that maybe they’ll talk about what you said later…

2) They will say nice things in a condescending way
Another sign that you are being judged is if someone starts patronizing you – and badly!

In my experience, people get condescending by being overly nice or supportive. Like if you told them you got a promotion at work, and they would respond with something like:

“Oh wow! How unbelievable! Aren’t you smart! What a huge accomplishment for you! You should feel good about yourself!”

This all sounds nice. And sure, this person could be really nice. But they might also sponsor you. I will judge you silently.

3) They will laugh when they think you can’t hear or see

The person who silently judges you will not always be in a crowd of people who know him or her. They can be alone.

Instead of smiling at others at the table, they will laugh at themselves after what you said.

They may do it quietly so you can’t hear it. Or they may do it when they think you can’t see them.

Either way, this is another sign that someone is subtly judging you for everything you just said or did.

4) They will ask a lot of questions (especially ones they already know the answers to)

Sometimes people ask questions they know the answers to in an attempt to convict you of lying. Other times, they do it to make you feel embarrassed.

Related : How Children Of Narcissists And Addicts Display Distressing Symptoms

When it’s the latter, they’re silently judging you – and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Let’s say you’ve been engaged for three years. Someone you know is well aware of this fact. But they keep asking you if you are engaged, when did you get engaged, how long have you been engaged, when is the wedding date, etc., etc.

These are not just general inquiries to strike up a conversation. They silently judge you because you enjoyed a long engagement without a date in the diary yet.

5) They will remain quiet after you finish speaking
Have you ever answered someone’s question and then had them stare at you without saying anything at all?

Sure, they may be socially awkward. Or waiting for the conversation to continue. But they may also (probably) silently judge you.

Why? Because some people use their silence to make you feel uncomfortable. Or to make you feel embarrassed about something you just said.

Like if you tell a joke and they don’t find it funny. They may not say they don’t find it funny. But they will just stare at you, without saying anything, until you or they change the subject.

Or if you share something personal about yourself. They may remain quiet because they don’t know what to say. And they’re judging you a little silently because of what you just said…

6) They will be expressionless when you speak
Another way to know if someone is silently judging you is to watch their expressions when you speak.

Sometimes, a person may remain completely expressionless when judging you for what you just said.

I’m not going to lie, I even do it myself sometimes! When someone at work insulted someone else, I didn’t make any movement on my face.

I was simply listening to what they said, all the while remaining calm – without smiling, nodding, or running away in any way.

This is not always a sign that someone is judging you. They may listen intently to your story. Or they feel comfortable enough to relax their faces around you!

Related : 6 signs someone is indirectly manipulating you, according to psychology

But it could also be a sign that they are silently judging you for what you say…

7) They will make minor changes to the face

Remember when I said that you need to monitor someone’s expressions to see if they are silently judging you? Well, that applies here too!

Some people are not good at hiding their feelings from their faces. I think the saying goes: “They had their hearts on their sleeves.”

These people will do their best to keep their judgment, disgust, shock, or other emotions from showing on their faces. But they may not be able to…

So you may pick up a slight movement that exposes them.

The eyebrow raise may be slight. There may be a slight widening of their eyes. It might be a small purse of their lips. Or there may be a little disgust.

Whatever it is, it is a ruling. It is a ruling that they are trying hard to hide!

8) They will look you up and down
Well, this one is probably pretty obvious. But maybe not! Because more often than not, the person who is silently judging you won’t do it when you’re looking.

But they will definitely look you up and down.

People do this when you watch them to make you feel small. When you’re not watching, they will because they take your shape.

More often than not, they’re judging something about your appearance – whether it’s your shoes, jeans, jacket, coat…

Or worse…

9) They will stare at one thing about you
When someone is silently judging you, they may not be so obvious as to look you up and down. Instead, their judgment will be more accurate.

They may stare at just one thing about you. Or maybe they keep looking at this thing.

Let’s say you wear weird or dirty shoes. They may stare at your feet for much longer than they should.

Or they may keep looking at them while you’re talking – or even while they’re talking.

This type of behavior is usually intentional. They want you to know that they disapprove of your shoes. But of course, they won’t want to be obvious about this.

If you call them to it, they will deny it. Because their behavior is so precise, what evidence do you really have?

10) They will ask random things about you
When someone silently judges you, they may state certain facts about you to make you feel insecure.

Or at least, to make you feel embarrassed, you have to explain yourself.

Like I saw a girl my brother had dated briefly on the train one morning. When we met again at a family gathering, she told everyone how she had seen me on the train one day “sitting in the priority seat.”

There was no need to mention that I was sitting in the priority seat. She brought it up to subtly let me know she was judging me for it. And of course to make me feel embarrassed about it in front of my family!

If someone is silently judging you, they might talk things like this about you too.

Related : 9 phrases covert narcissists use to subtly manipulate you

Sometimes it will be when you are in a crowd. Sometimes, it will just be an individual thing. In both cases, the result is the same. It’s a silent judgment on something you’ve done.

(Oh and by the way, I was only on the train two stops and it was empty!).


Like I said before, everyone is a little judgmental sometimes. I’m sure you have judged many, many people you have met in life!

Just because you judge someone else, it doesn’t make you a bad person.

Sometimes it makes you a little mean, but sometimes it makes you human.

Either way, if someone is silently judging you, the best thing you can do for yourself is to let them go.

If you want to learn from things and become better, reflect on your behavior and start making a change. But if you are truly happy with who you are and what you do, don’t let the silent judgments of others hold you back.