9 clever ways to keep your cool around toxic people

Navigating your way with toxic people can be a real challenge.

The key is to stay calm, even when they are testing every ounce of your patience.

You find smart tactics to keep yourself safe and sane. They will protect your mental space.

In this article, I’ll share nine smart strategies to help you stay calm around toxic people.

1) Make it neutral
Dealing with toxic individuals can be like navigating a minefield. One wrong move, and surprise, you’ll be thrown into a spiral of negativity.

How do you maintain your neutrality?

This means not responding with as much anger or frustration when they try to provoke you.

Instead, keep your tone of voice and body language calm and collected, even if you’re seething inside.

Their negativity is their problem, not yours. Don’t let them dictate how you should feel.

This way you conserve your emotional energy and avoid unnecessary confrontations.

Staying neutral is not always easy, but with practice, it becomes a powerful tool in dealing with toxic individuals.

2) Set boundaries
I remember when I had a difficult coworker. She had a talent for turning even the simplest issues into dramatic incidents.

For some reason, I liked to bring drama into my office.

At first, I coddled her, thinking I was being supportive. But soon it started to drain me.

I felt like I was always on edge, preparing for the next crisis.

That was the moment I realized the importance of setting boundaries.

I politely declined when she tried to lure me into the drama.

I would say things like, “I’m overwhelmed right now; Maybe we can discuss this later? Or “I think you should talk to our supervisor about this issue.”

Over time, she received the message and backed off.

Although the situation was difficult, it taught me that setting clear boundaries is crucial when dealing with toxic individuals.

Boundaries protect your mental health and signal to others that their negativity has no place in your space.

3) Focus on solutions, not problems
In the modern world, bias can often lead us to think about problems instead of looking for solutions.

When dealing with toxic people, it’s easy to get caught up in their drama and negativity.

Instead of getting sucked into their problem-oriented mindset, try shifting the focus toward potential solutions.

For example, if someone is constantly complaining about a situation, you can suggest a potential solution instead of joining the complaining session or ask them how they plan to solve the problem.

This approach helps maintain your mental balance and subtly encourages a more positive and proactive outlook.

Where attention goes, energy flows. Let’s direct it towards solutions instead of problems.

4) Practice self-care
While dealing with toxic people, it is essential not to neglect your own needs.

Self-care comes in many forms. It may take a few minutes to meditate or do deep breathing exercises every day.

This could be going for a run, reading a book, or just taking a relaxing bath.
Whatever form it takes, self-care can recharge your emotional batteries and give yourself the strength to deal with toxic individuals.

You can’t pour from an empty cup; Hence, take time to replenish your needs.

5) Don’t take it personally
Toxic people often have a way of making you feel like you’re the problem.

Their behavior is a reflection of them, not yours.

It’s easy to internalize their negativity and start thinking there’s something wrong with you.

But this is not the issue. People act toxically because of their problems and insecurities.

When a toxic person tries to bring you down, remind yourself that it’s not your problem. You are a target for them to project their problems onto.

Ignore it and move on. You know your worth; Don’t let anyone make you doubt it.

6) Show empathy
Here’s the hard truth: Behind every toxic person, there is often a story of pain, disappointment, or trauma.

This no longer excuses their behavior but may help you understand it better.

Showing empathy does not mean accepting or condoning their toxic behavior.

It just means that you acknowledge their humanity, and that can be a powerful tool in dealing with them.

When you approach a toxic person with empathy, it can sometimes defuse their negativity.

It shows them that they are being heard and understood, something they may not often receive.

Sometimes, that’s all people need to start making positive changes.

7) Ask for support
There was a time when I felt so overwhelmed by a toxic person in my life.

I felt helpless as their negativity was seeping into every aspect of my being.

That’s when I reached out for support. I opened up to a close friend about what I was going through.

I had someone who would listen and validate my feelings, which makes a difference.

Sharing your experiences with someone you trust can be incredibly therapeutic.

Helps you gain perspective. Often times, they can offer advice or ideas that you may not have thought of yet.

You don’t have to deal with toxic people alone. Reach out and ask for support.

Sometimes, a shoulder to lean on is all you need to regain your strength.

8) Limit your exposure
Staying calm can be difficult if you’re always around toxic people.

Limiting your exposure to them is a practical and effective strategy.

This may mean physically staying away from them or limiting your time with them.

If you can’t avoid them completely (for example, if they’re a coworker or family member), try minimizing your interactions.

By doing this, you are creating a healthy environment for yourself.

You have the right to protect your mental and emotional health.

Don’t feel guilty about doing what’s best for you.

9) Be honest with yourself
The most important thing to remember when dealing with toxic people is to stay true to yourself.

Don’t let their negativity change who you are or how you see the world.

It’s easy to start mirroring their toxic behavior or let their negativity overshadow your positive outlook.

You have control over your actions and attitudes.

Be kind, stay positive, stay you. You are stronger and more resilient than you think.

Final Thoughts: Self-preservation

When navigating through the murky waters of dealing with toxic people, it’s not a contest of who can outdo whom, but rather a strategy for self-preservation.

You keep your cool around toxic people.

You choose peace instead of chaos, solutions instead of problems, and compassion instead of resentment.

You maintain your mental and emotional health with negativity.

Stay true to your values, and don’t let others dictate how you should feel or react.

Ultimately, dealing with toxic people is an exercise in patience and resilience. It is a journey of self-growth.