Have you ever wondered if someone you know is a narcissist or sociopath? How can you tell the difference?
First, let me say that all sociopaths are narcissists, but not all narcissists are sociopaths. Confused? Let me try to explain.
While there are clear similarities between the two personality types, the motivations behind what they do and say are different. The sociopath wants to control every aspect of your life, while the narcissist wants you to devote all your time and attention to him.
However, both personality types will say similar things to get you where they want you.
Here are 5 phrases a narcissistic sociopath will use that will make you feel like you’re crazy.
Related: 7 Things Only Narcissists Will Do (Because They’re The Worst)
- “I hate drama.”
They’ll tell you they hate drama, but you’ll soon learn that there’s more drama surrounding them than anyone you’ve ever known.
At first, they worshiped you more than anyone else, praising you for your quiet, idealistic nature. But remember, they are pathological liars, serial cheaters, and eternal victims. These traits will soon start to appear and cause you great confusion.
Anytime you mention your concerns or frustrations, they will declare their hatred for drama and make you feel bad for reacting to their awful behavior.
She makes you feel like a drama queen or king.
- “You…”
…fill the gaps. Crazy, bipolar, jealous, bitter, infatuated with them…the list goes on and on. Name-exchanging usually begins when the relationship starts to go downhill.
At the beginning of your relationship, they will tell you that all their ex-lovers, colleagues, and friends are crazy, bipolar, jealous, bitter, or that they still love them. But they then maintain contact with these same people, and use them to cause chaos.
Then they throw you into the same “crazy pile,” making you feel insecure and lowering your self-worth. While you’re frustrated, they make excuses for their toxic behaviors.
Related: How A Narcissist Thinks (Warning: It’s Pretty Messed Up)
- “You’re too sensitive.”
After they shower you with praise and compliments 24/7, they will ignore you for days on end and wait for your reaction.
When you finally do, they’ll accuse you of being sensitive or needy. They will insult you, belittle you, criticize you (sometimes in a teasing or teasing manner), and push your boundaries until you finally speak up.
Then they use your reactions to make you look crazy. Within weeks, they can turn a simple person into a complete mess of insecurity and self-doubt.
- “You misunderstood me.”
We all misunderstand what people say from time to time. But a narcissist and sociopath will intentionally say things they know will make you angry.
Then when you act, they will turn it around and blame you for misunderstanding. Often times, they will deny that they ever said it before.
This is called “gaslighting” – doing or saying something blatantly, then blaming yourself for misinterpreting it (or denying that it happened). The truth is that you understood what they said perfectly well. They are just trying to make you doubt your sanity.
- “You can’t live without me.”
This is the hoped-for outcome that all sociopaths and narcissists want. They use manipulative phrases and actions to make you feel like you can’t survive without them.
But they don’t do it because they want a healthy relationship with you. What they want is to control you, and they control you by making you feel like you are crazy.
Don’t let them get away with it. You can and will survive without them.
Related: 5 Personality Traits That Attract Narcissists & Abusers
