How do you teach a toxic person a lesson in your life? Well, honestly, a few things. If you want to protect your sanity, there are some practical ways to stand your ground.
Teaching a toxic person a lesson may not be like beating up a bully or demonstrating narcissistic behavior to others around you. After all, it’s almost impossible to tear off the narcissist’s mask in front of everyone.
However, you can show the obnoxious person that you will not go quietly. Standing up for yourself and making other small moves of courage can greatly improve your life.
Effective lessons for teaching a toxic person
Here’s the thing: Toxic people can be anyone in your life, including your parents, friends, siblings, or even a date. How you deal with them depends on the relationship.
So, teaching this person or people a lesson will not always be easy. But for the sake of your mental health, this step may be necessary. Let’s take a look at some of the ways we can put an end to how toxic behavior affects us. Let’s teach them a lesson, shall we?
- The gray rock method
Most of you know what the gray rock method is, but in case you don’t know, let me explain. This way of winning against a toxic person requires persistence.
When narcissists, for example, do things to get a reaction, you can refuse to show emotion. While this is easier said than done, ignoring a toxic person’s attempts to make you angry or upset will lower their ego.
After many attempts to start a fight, they will realize that you really have the upper hand by holding your feelings and refusing to fight back. They learn quickly through this.
- Say no without explanation
We, as humans, are used to explaining ourselves a lot. The toxic person already knows this and uses this guilt to get what they want. In fact, toxic people always expect you to say yes to them because they feel right all along.
When you say no without any explanation, the toxic person’s mind just can’t comprehend it. It throws them for a loop and they learn that you are not as resilient as they thought. Also, when you say no, just walk away. It reinforces the point.
- Stay unavailable
Speaking of staying away, the narcissist will quickly learn if you remain unavailable to their manipulative tactics.
For example, every time they try to start an overtly toxic conversation, tell them, “I have to get work done. I don’t have time to talk,” or something like that. Making yourself unavailable to all negative encounters will let the toxic person know that you know what they’re doing. Thus, you will not be located in the trash.
- Set those tough boundaries
Listen to the voice within when it comes to your limits. Toxic people will consume you before you understand what happened. If you feel like something is not right, just know that your boundaries, which were set before, have been broken. And this usually happens gradually over time, especially when it comes to someone close to you, such as a partner.
To teach a toxic person a lesson, let them know your boundaries and refuse to let them cross those boundaries. They will understand the message.
- Be strong but kind
When you say no, set boundaries, and make yourself unavailable, there’s no need to be mean about it. You can stand strong with love and compassion to get your point across.
Just say what you mean and do it without shouting or insulting. This sends a message to the toxic person about how they should be. It’s a lesson that helps you grow and plants seeds that might help them too.
- Don’t take unjustified blame
A toxic person rarely takes responsibility for the things they do. That is, if they could, they would blame you.
So, to really teach them a lesson, refuse to blame them, even if it means making them angry. It may not change the way they act, but they’ve learned that you won’t be playing any of their games.
- Give them alone time
A narcissist, for example, likes to use the silent treatment when you make him angry. But instead of letting this get to you, walk away. This reinforces the fact that you don’t care if they stop talking to you. When they see that you are not affected, most of the time they will start talking again.
Unfortunately, talking can be more serious, but at the very least, they’ll learn a lesson about not using the silent treatment. Toxic people, when they fail to win, will go back to their bag of tricks until there are no tricks left to try.
Teach a toxic person a lesson today!
The faster you teach a toxic person a lesson, the faster your life will improve and improve exponentially. This does not mean that there should be negative encounters going on as I mentioned above. You see, you can resist without being tough at all. That in and of itself teaches a lot when you’re trying to be strong and compassionate.