A relationship ending is never easy, but relationships do fall apart and it can be the most painful and messy experience for some people. But, even after a difficult breakup, it is possible to walk the road to recovery. But how to be happy after a breakup? Here are 5 things you need to do to rebuild your life and open the door to a brighter future.

If you’re reading this article, I suspect you’re trying to figure out how to be happy again after a breakup. I get it! I’ve been there.

I’m not sure there is any pain more intense than the pain we feel after a breakup! I remember my first heart broken. With Bobby Fortunato in eighth grade. Nowadays, laptops come with high-quality graphics card. I remember my mom letting me stay home from school and giving me jello!

So there you are, in the middle of the storm, struggling to stay afloat and wondering how you’ll ever be happy again! You can be! I promise you!

How to be happy after a breakup

Here are 5 things to do to be happy again after a breakup.

1. Ban them everywhere.
   Blocking the ex is the number one thing I recommend people do to be happy again after a breakup. Which is the number one thing people don’t do and it holds them back.

So why is it so important to block someone after a breakup and why is it so hard to do?

The reason why it is so important to block your ex is that you mustn’t ‘contact’ them. That means not seeing each other, talking to each other, texting each other, or liking each other’s posts on Instagram. Why is this important? Because any contact, any contact, will take you back to square one—the moment of separation—when the pain was intense.

Back in the day, when we broke up with someone, we broke up with them. With a little effort, we can avoid them, and then we can move on. Now, we can access any information about our ex that we want, at any time. And when we do, it sets us back.

I have a client whose heart was broken by a man, and after six months, she’s starting to feel better. She was even opening herself up to the idea of dating again. What happened? Late one night, her ex-husband drunkenly texted her. She was so excited because she thought he wanted her back.

So, she replied and they texted all night long. The next morning, there was radio silence. He got up and moved on. And what happened to her? I’m devastated, yet again, and back to square one!

So why is it so hard to stop someone after a breakup? I think it’s mostly about hope. I hope their person comes back to them one day and they want to make sure they are there just in case that happens. People also want to keep tabs on their person, to see how fast they are progressing. Sometimes they can’t or don’t want to, break the habit. But mostly, I think, it’s because they’re pinning hope on the future.

Now that I’ve shown you what my client’s reunion with her ex did for her, I hope you can see that you don’t want to be there for your future ex-partner — you want to move on. So, if you want to be happy after a breakup, block your ex. I promise it will be of great help.

Read : Getting a Divorce? 5 Things You Need To Do First

2. Rearrange your space.
   be honest. How many times in the past few days have I looked at the chair they sat on at breakfast or their side of the couch or the pillows they slept on and then burst into tears? The memories your ex-husband had in your home are deep and may prevent you from recovering.

So, what can you do about it? You can change your space! Shake things up so your ex’s energy is gone for good and you have room to make new memories. What do I mean by changing your space? You can be big or small. Whatever is good for you.

When my sister got divorced, she switched her bedroom to another room in the house. A client of mine painted all the walls. I bought flannel sheets because my ex hated them. A friend moved the breakfast table to the other side of the kitchen. Remove any things they may have left behind, including photos!

Imagine what it would feel like to walk down the stairs in the morning and not see your ex sitting there empty. Imagine if, because of your new sheets, your bed no longer looked like the bed you shared with your ex. If your space is your space again.

Even if your space is small, there’s still an opportunity to make a change right now. Look around you. What would feel good to change now? Stand up and do it or make a plan to do it this weekend! You’ll be glad you did!

3. Change your routine.
   Just like changing your space, changing your routine is an essential part of feeling happy again after a breakup.

We are all creatures of habits and we tend to do the same things day in and day out. My partner and I know, when we get home from work, we go for a walk, have a drink on the couch, make dinner, watch some TV, and go to bed. We do it almost every day and we love it. It is very convenient.

I know if we broke up, I would be devastated. And I will, probably, continue to do the things we’ve always done together. This will make me lonely.

Take a look at your routine. What kind of habits did you and your ex develop throughout your relationship? Do you go to the same coffee shop every Saturday? Go to a different one. Do you have pizza for dinner every Wednesday? Have a burrito instead. Did you both have your side of the bed? Switch your place to another side.

Changing your routine will help you get over your ex. It will also adjust your mind to the new reality. When we do the same things over and over again, our brains get messy. When we are pulled out of our cracks, we feel very uncomfortable. But, if we can stay away from them, we can rewire our brains to do things differently—namely, to no longer focus on our ex.

So, what kind of routines and habits do you and your ex share? Which of them can you change? (You can even start with just one!) When can you change this thing? How would you feel doing that? Changing your routine will be an essential part of your journey to being happy again after a breakup.

4. Push yourself.
   How to be happy again after a breakup: 5 things to do
   Ways to find happiness after a breakup
   When I got divorced 12 years ago, I was a shell of myself. For 20 years I was married to someone who made me feel fear – not afraid of him but afraid of the world around me.

As a result, there were a lot of things I didn’t do. I couldn’t do that. And when I noticed this, I realized that I would have to do some of these things if I wanted to be happy again. So what did you do? I proceeded to do all the things I was uncomfortable doing.

I’ve always been afraid of jet skis and snorkeling – and I’ve done both. It was becoming increasingly uncomfortable driving in snowstorms, so I did it at every opportunity I could. I went to Peru and climbed a 17,000-foot mountain and to Arizona and climbed to the bottom of the Grand Canyon.

What have you done for me? It rebuilt my self-esteem and made me realize that I was a person outside of my relationship. Accomplishing things that were hard made me feel so good about myself and so strong. And I realized there wasn’t anything I couldn’t do on my own — and I didn’t need to be part of a couple to succeed or live a good life.

I would encourage you to take stock of the things that scare you and to start doing at least one of them. Do the things you’ve always wanted to do, even if you have to do them alone. Be the person you were before the end of this relationship. That person is still there waiting to be freed from behind the grief!

Read : 7 Small Things To Do When You Feel Like A Failure After Divorce

5. I wish you hope.
   I know that from where you sit, you feel that your future is hopeless and that you will never love or be loved again. What I can promise you is that what you feel is not right. I promise you. When we’re in a bad place, it’s almost impossible to see the future as a hopeful one. We feel what it is like when we are miserable and the journey out of that misery is murky.

What I can promise you is that with time, you will be happy again. You will get your life back. you will be happy. You will love and be loved again. It is more than possible – it is most likely.

However, you can’t just sit back and eat ice cream, watch TV, stalk your ex on Instagram, and wait for the misery to end. You should be able to step up and take the necessary steps to get your life back. So, even if you feel hopeless, listen to me. You can do that! And it will be worth it, you’ll see!

I know it’s hard to believe that you can be happy again after a breakup but I hope I inspired you to change things up a bit so you can move on and be happy, sooner rather than later!

When we let go of a relationship, it is often the lingering effects, the energy, the loss, and the grief, that keep us from healing. If you can shake your space and your head, completely block out your persona, and push yourself to find yourself again, you will be happy again.

You will have the life and love you always wanted! I promise you! Healing after a breakup is entirely possible