Once I kicked my toxic ex out of my life, I started breathing again.
I was completely ignorant of all the ways my ex had poisoned my life. He would twist my words so subtly that I would end up apologizing for things I didn’t do. I was always the monster and he was never to blame.
I loved the attention he gave me from the beginning, and I loved listening to him but as we progressed in the relationship, he abused my words and thoughts. He took advantage of my weaknesses and insecurities and made them deeper.
Like an idiot, I made excuses for him because I didn’t think he did it on purpose. But it got worse over time and I became a shadow of the woman I once was.
I didn’t recognize my voice anymore because it was so silent. The volume of my laughter decreased almost completely. All that kept screaming were the doubts in my head and the sounds of wailing at night when I was alone.
I knew I had to do something or I would completely lose myself. I had to get away from him to save myself.
Once I broke up with him, I felt like I was freed from the mental cage he kept me in. I have been freed from the shackles of insecurity that have been imprinted on me.
Finally, I started to hear my voice again, I started to laugh again, I started to breathe and live again. Because my relationship with him was not life.
Once I started listening to all the mean voices, I thrived.
Deceptive comments packaged like honest advice have toxic substance written all over them. People who try to bring you down in order to lift themselves up are the worst thing that can happen to you professionally and in life.
Don’t allow it. Smile at them and keep doing what you’ve been doing and your hard work will pay off in the end. Mine did.
What I learned here is that not all of your coworkers have to be your friends; You are very lucky if they are. Time always tells you who you can trust and get close to, who you should keep away from you and who you should build your relationship with on a professional level.
I surrounded myself with people who had my best interests at heart, who didn’t envy my successes, and who didn’t feed their broken egos with my suffering, and I began to rise from the ashes that toxic people had put me in.
Once I said goodbye to some of the people I thought were my friends, my connections with the real ones became stronger.
A toxic friend is just like a toxic friend, they suck the life out of you. All the energy and love you invest in them, they don’t invest back in, and when you keep giving, you’re left empty.
True friends never do that. They never use you, they meet you halfway. They never put you down, they lift you up because they believe in you even when you start to doubt yourself.
Not only are they there during calm seas, they are there during the worst storms as well. They have your back no matter what. They are happy for your happiness and empathize with your pain.
I really started to appreciate true friends once I compared them to toxic friends. All the ways in which they were different spoke to me. They are the best thing that could ever happen to me and I’m sure they know how grateful I am.
Once I stopped trying to make everyone around me happy, I started feeling happy.
It’s as if I have a subconscious mission in life to make everyone happy. I would go so far as to accommodate them and it would backfire on me.
The nicer I was, the worse they treated me. No matter if it was my ex, my boyfriend, or even a family member, the process was the same; The more I try to make them happy, the more they expect from me. They took me for granted.
I will give up everything I was doing or everything I planned to do. It’s like I didn’t know how to say no because I was afraid they would be offended.
And after a long time of putting up with it, I changed. I couldn’t take it anymore. So, I started putting myself first for a change.
Some people left, some stayed and adapted to my new personality. Either way, it was the best decision I’ve ever made.
Once I started eliminating toxic people from my life, I realized that this was the best form of self-care.
Once I said goodbye to all the toxins in my life, I suddenly began to thrive. I wasn’t as worn out as I used to be. I had more time to meet my own needs. I have more time for people who inspire me to grow.
After I got rid of all the negativity in my life, positivity found its way back to me. My life is much better with the absence of some people. So, you see, this method of self-care wasn’t selfish, it was necessary and long overdue.
