If you learn to recognize the secret language of manipulators, it will be much more difficult for them to take advantage of you.
If you’ve ever encountered a sociopath, psychopath, narcissist, or other type of deviant personality, you’ve probably wondered how you were tricked, played, used, tricked, or deceived.
People like sociopaths and psychopaths use different techniques and a kind of secret language to manipulate their victims. They will want to confuse, demoralize, and disorient their victims so that they can exercise absolute power over them.
They are experts at manipulation and have a number of tricks up their sleeves, including a secret language, all designed to overwhelm their victims.
Here are some of the kinds of things they say:
sociopaths
‘You exaggerate’
This is the manipulator’s most common response, as it immediately returns focus to the victim and draws attention away from the problem or situation. This phrase is often used by a psychopath or sociopath because it makes the victim believe they have nothing to worry about, when in fact the opposite is true.
“just kidding”
This is especially bad because it immediately ignores the other person’s feelings. They are considered invalid, the conversation is closed, and you are seen as a delicate snowflake. If this starts to become common behavior, you should be concerned that the next level may involve aggression against you.
“Stop being so silly”
Again, this is another dismissive tactic to make the other person feel like a hero and that their thoughts and feelings don’t count in the relationship. A normal partnership involves two equal sides who communicate well and are considerate of other people’s feelings, regardless of whether they are silly or not. If someone is constantly telling you that you’re being silly all the time, it’s time to leave.
Oh, Lord
“You’re over-analyzing.”
The thing about psychopaths is that they do things that make you think you’re crazy, so when you start to question those things, their usual reaction will be unperturbed boredom. It’s their ultimate quenching. They make you doubt your sanity through their very actions, but the minute you start getting answers, they shut you down.
“I really hate drama”
Which is invaluable to say because psychopaths love to create drama, and that’s what they live for. They are sneaky liars, manipulators, con artists and are always the victim in their own little dramas.
“You misunderstand me”
Psychopaths will intentionally say things they know aren’t true, but when you react to this they will say they never said them in the first place. This is known as gaslighting and is intended to make you question your own sanity. When psychopaths keep doing this, you will feel as if you are going crazy, which of course is their ultimate goal.
narcissus
‘I’ve never felt this way before’
Narcissists often make their intended victim believe they are in an amazing relationship, so they will say things like “You are so amazing,” “I have never loved anyone like that before,” but these are all lies. The narcissist is conditioning his victim to believe that this relationship is very special, but only because they will require the undivided attention of the other person in the future.
“You’re paranoid”
Narcissists often say things that reflect their inner fears and anxieties, so when they say things like “You are paranoid” or “You are a control freak,” what they are really saying is that they are all of those things.
“I don’t have this problem with anyone else”
In order to hide their own insecurities, the narcissist will often turn the tables on their partner by saying that the problem lies with them, not the narcissist. This is to weaken the self-esteem and confidence of the other person until they become completely docile in the hands of the narcissist.
The good news is that whether you are dealing with a sociopath, a psychopath, or a narcissist, we all have our own defense mechanism, which is our intuition and gut feeling. If something doesn’t feel right to you consistently, trust your own judgment, not what someone else is telling you.
If you have encountered any of these deviant personality types in your life and know more examples of the secret language of manipulators, please share them in the comments below. It might help some other people who have to deal with it.
