What do narcissists want? attention! When do they need it? now! Of course, there is nothing wrong with attention and praise, but narcissists force you to focus on them. Narcissists use every manipulation tool in their arms to get your attention.
One way to do this is to get you involved in arguments that you can’t win. Narcissists never back down or apologize. So what can you do if you get into an argument with a narcissist? Here are 25 closure statements for a narcissist in an argument.
25 Phrases to Close a narcissist
If they blame you
Narcissists blame their nearest and dearest, loved ones, strangers, and even society when things go wrong. Nothing will be their fault. There is a psychological term known as “locus of control” which perfectly sums up narcissists.
While you will never make them accept responsibility, there is no reason for you to take the blame for something they are not happy about. Here’s how to shut down a narcissist using the blame game.
This is not how I remember the situation.
I’ll wait for you to calm down, then we can talk about this.
I am not responsible for the way you live your life.
I’m sorry you feel so, maybe we need some time apart?
I will not argue with you anymore.
If they criticize you
Narcissists are arrogant and lack empathy. They use words as weapons and target your weaknesses like a nuclear missile. They know what to say to hurt you, and they are happy to do so.
Narcissists want to see the damage they’ve done, so don’t give them the satisfaction of showing your feelings. Make your answers unemotional and matter-of-fact, and don’t ask why you’re being criticized. This gives the narcissist more fuel for their fire.
Here’s what you say to a narcissist to shut him down if he criticizes you:
I won’t let you talk to me like that.
Unless you treat me with respect, I can’t continue this conversation.
If I’m so bad, I’d better leave.
I can’t control your opinion of me.
Can we please respect each other?
when they want attention
Narcissists suffer from low self-esteem and need the attention of those around them. The problem is that if you give them too much attention, you inflate their egos.
However, narcissists want any attention, be it positive or negative. If they don’t get enough positive attention, they will stir up an argument to put the focus back on them.
They make up silly things, talk fast, and swap one topic for another to deliberately throw you off balance. They would be wildly emotional and, in some cases, make no sense at all.
In situations like this, you need to shut down the narcissist quickly, or it can quickly escalate into a narcissistic rage.
Slower. you do not understand.
Prove what you say.
you keep changing the subject; Which one would you like to discuss first?
I don’t deal with this.
Let’s sort out one thing at a time.
Lies, lies, and lies
Narcissists are pathological liars, but they use lies as a gaslighting technique. They lie about what they did, what they imagine you’ve done, and everything else in between. Narcissists twist reality to confuse and ultimately control you.
They may deliberately lie in advance to catch you. For example, they ask you to meet them at a certain time and get there an hour early. You start to doubt yourself. This is where the narcissist wants you.
My friend’s girlfriend was a narcissist and once called out to my friend complaining that he brought up my name every two minutes. This is impossible. He had to say my name 30 times an hour.
If you want to shut down a narcissist who constantly lies, pay attention to his exact words and then call them out.
This is physically impossible.
I know I/you didn’t say/do that.
Prove That.
What you say is meaningless.
I have no reason to do the things you accuse me of.
If they escalate into a narcissistic rage
There are stages of narcissistic abuse. In certain circumstances, the narcissist will give you the silent treatment or narcissistic stare to intimidate you into compliance.
Narcissists want your reaction, so if they don’t get the reaction they want, they will say the most hysterical and dramatic things to force a response. The more frustrated they are, the more likely they are to enter a narcissistic rage; This could be dangerous.
One way to defuse an escalating argument is to agree with them. Although this may seem counterintuitive or wrong, realize that narcissists live in a fantasy world.
Nothing you say will make any difference to their behavior in the long run. Furthermore, this is one way to shut down the narcissist if the situation is heading towards the narcissist’s anger.
I understand your point.
I completely agree with you.
This is an interesting perspective. Let me think of it.
I’ve never thought of it this way before.
Thanks for bringing that to my attention.
