Being with a narcissist can destroy you in every aspect, be it mentally, physically, or psychologically. The narcissist will always try to make sure that you doubt yourself every step of the way. One way or another, the narcissist poisons you emotionally, day after day. But how does a narcissist poison you?
The narcissist goes beyond challenging the dignity and human rights of another person, to the point where it is classified as psychological and emotional abuse and domestic violence. They undermine a person’s psychological well-being in such a cunning and sadistic way that the target becomes completely vulnerable, unprotected, and frightened.
Related: What It Means When a Narcissist Says “I Love You”
Who is a narcissist?
A narcissist is someone who cannot think of another person apart from themselves. They have a pathological need to dictate to everyone, and if someone tries to challenge them, they rain hell on them. In the narcissist’s world, there is no room for others in his life or their emotions.
How does a narcissist poison you and your whole being?
Narcissists manipulate and bully their victims to the point that the victims begin to question themselves at every stage of their lives. They do not fully trust themselves and their abilities and are constantly looking for external validation from the narcissist. In addition, they are also unable to make any kind of decisions on their own, and will always depend on the narcissist for himself.
This is when a narcissist dominates and brainwashes someone so much, that they lose their ability to perceive, decide, and act on their terms. Due to the massive psychological and emotional abuse, victims lose their sense of themselves and believe that narcissist is always right.
This is also exploited when narcissists poison you emotionally by manipulating the truth and making statements like “You’re crazy,” “I never said that,” or “You’re imagining things.”
Narcissistic manipulation involves the narcissist stepping up the game by reinforcing what they say by backing it up with statements from supposedly agreeable friends, co-workers, or relatives who are extremely concerned about the target/victim (and possibly further lies).
The target/victim is completely broken and unable to trust their notions of life (those we take for granted as merely knowing what to do with life, etc.), so they isolate themselves because life is so confusing and they dread it.
The narcissist’s ultimate goal is complete control of his victim’s life, hence the constant emotional abuse and psychological abuse. They don’t even care the slightest bit about the victim’s condition or what she’s going through, as long as their needs are met.
Related: 4 Levels of Gaslighting: From Unconscious to Malicious
Who does this? The answer is only someone with a very black and disturbing mind. The main reason a narcissist would emotionally poison you is that this way you will be completely under his or her control.
A relationship with a narcissist almost always ends in a lot of pain and self-loathing. Even if you can cut ties with a narcissistic partner, you come out of the relationship completely broken and filled with self-doubt.
It takes you from the goodness and normalcy that you have lived your whole life to a dark place where you now feel incompetent and worthless because everything you do is wrong and you are worthless.
Every step you take, you will think about it again and again until the feeling of helplessness settles in like old times. Feeling useless and helpless all the time is one of the after-effects of narcissistic abuse.
This is how you can break this vicious cycle of abuse
The good news is that you can beat this! No matter what narcissist filled your mind or no matter how he destroyed your self-confidence, you can take it all back.
The first step in achieving this is to accept that you are not useless and that you are not worthless at all. Whatever the narcissist has filled your mind with can be discarded and you can go back again to being the person you were before you got into that painful relationship. However, such changes can only be made by you and only if you wish to do so.
Constantly tell yourself that the things the narcissist has made you believe and feel are not true. You are so much more than he thinks of you. You are so much more than he makes you feel. Once you start stripping away the layers of abuse, you will find yourself again.
The moment you get the education that helps you see the narcissist’s reality, you can free yourself and break the vicious cycle.
Related: 15 Effects of Being Raised by a Narcissist
This is what begins on your path to recovery, acknowledging the fact that this was apparent and managed by someone with a personality disorder. Don’t blame yourself, you were tricked into believing this person loved you, you trusted this person, you believed in them, and you gave them your love in return.
But they were never that person – they were a sadistic, abusive person who caused you great distress. Know this and never allow yourself to accept their abuse again.
