Narcissistic women often gather a group of male admirers, using them to boost their self-esteem and manipulate them to their advantage.

But they don’t enjoy this group of men by chance; they gather them intentionally. These men aren’t saints who love to give; they are manipulated.

Once you learn how narcissistic women attract men, you’ll be more likely to recognize what they’re up to and be able to identify whether they’re narcissistic and want to take. This allows you to know whether you’re in a genuine friendship or relationship, or whether you’re being exploited for your own resources.

Here’s how narcissistic women attract men…

Playing The_Victory

Many narcissists play the role of the helpless victim, especially with men. This serves several purposes.

The narcissist hopes that the man will take pity on her and take her under his wing. Help her with whatever problem she’s facing.

Related : How Life Improves When You Leave A Narcissist

This allows her to enjoy a one-sided relationship, where she creates problems, and he comes to the rescue. It allows her to take without giving anything in return.

Playing the helpless victim also allows her to test the man. To see if his instincts push him to help and protect her. To be her knight in shining armor. Because that’s what she wants.

Subtle Flirting

Most narcissistic women flirt with men because they know it gives them power. And more importantly, it also gives them attention.

Narcissistic women know that if a man is interested, they’re more likely to go out of their way for him. So they reap the rewards.

They may benefit from free nights out, gifts, help with their problems, and all sorts of other perks.

So she shows there’s a spark between them. To attract them. But she does it subtly. So, it’s not very obvious. But why is it subtle? There are two reasons for this…

The first is to maintain power. A narcissistic woman knows that if she seems too excited, the man has the power. Because he has what she wants.

So she flirts subtly, so it’s not entirely obvious that she’s flirting. This raises suspicion. This keeps her in the driver’s seat.

The second reason is that the man believes he’s the one initiating a romantic relationship. She may delude herself about this, reinforcing her grandiose delusions.

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This makes the narcissistic woman feel special and desirable. More importantly, it allows her to put the “pursuer” in a place where no one else knows. And that’s exactly what she wants…

Back Off

Once the narcissistic woman receives signals from the man, she backs off. She acts cold. At least from a romantic perspective.

She may say she just wants to be friends. Or she may claim she’s unsure what she wants.

This is designed to confuse and distract the man. And to control him. Because he picks up on the signals, yet is told no.

If the man continues to pursue her, she knows she has him where she wants him. Because now she has what he wants. Her own. So she can dangle the carrot and exploit him.

If a man respectfully stops pursuing her, it doesn’t end there. She restarts the flirting. To attract him back. Because she wants him to want her.

Narcissists know that the person with the least interest in a romantic relationship has the power. So she directs him to where he wants more. But she doesn’t.

Triangulation

During this push and pull, the narcissistic woman often brings other men into the equation. They may be male “friends” she also flirts with, ex-partners, coworkers, etc.

The narcissistic woman hopes to make them compete for her affection, fight among themselves, and win her over.

This conflict provides abundant narcissistic supply, in the form of attention, flattery, and favors. It also feeds her ego, making her believe she is a highly coveted prize.

Related : What Makes Narcissists Jealous?

The narcissistic woman may show off with gifts and nights out. Others pay for it, hoping to stir up jealousy and competition. They compete to outdo each other, while she makes the money.

Test

Inside her harem, a narcissistic woman tests her male admirers. She sees how obedient and controlling they are, how generous they are, and how strong their boundaries are.

Narcissists don’t want mutually beneficial relationships. They want to take as much as they can, with as little as possible to give. So she tests them to find the perfect match.

She may decide that one man will give her more than the others, so she surrenders to a full-fledged relationship with him. But what about the others?

Keeps Her Male Friends

Even though she’s now in a relationship, she keeps her male admirers. She acts naively, as if she doesn’t know they’re interested.

If her current partner complains about the men in her life, she turns things upside down. She accuses him of being a controlling man. Who wants to get rid of her friends? He’s left with no choice but to accept the situation.

She knows full well that he doesn’t like her having male friends. But she doesn’t care, because it’s all about what she wants.

More Triangulation

With a permanent lover and a network of male admirers, the narcissistic woman has complete control. She keeps her partner on their toes by complimenting them on things like their generosity from her male “friends.”

She wants her current partner to realize that she has options. So, she improves her performance to keep her.

Related : Why Narcissists Mirror You

To her male friends, she keeps dangling the carrot, hinting that they may still be alive. She may even discuss the relationship’s “issues” with them, knowing that this boosts their hopes and keeps them in check.

Temporary

These male friends offer more than just a temporary fix for her partner. They are also useful options that can be kept in reserve in case her primary relationship deteriorates.

Most narcissists need unlimited attention and hate the idea of ​​being single.

Having a large number of admirers is a great insurance policy for narcissists, as they don’t have to worry about their partner leaving because there are alternative options available.

This allows them to treat their partner even worse, reassured that if their partner has had enough and leaves, they can be quickly replaced.

Marital_Relationships

Although narcissists are more likely to cheat, not all of them do. Not in theory, anyway.

If a narcissist isn’t having an affair with one of her admirers, she’s likely to cross the line emotionally.

She may hint that something else might be going on between them, and she may discuss her relationship “issues.” All to keep them close, to exploit them, and to keep them in the background.

She may also reveal secrets about her relationship. And even make things up, if it’s in her best interest. Because she has no real loyalty to her partner… or to her admirers.

A narcissistic woman rules like a puppet, controlling everyone. She plays them all off against each other, making their lives miserable. While taking the maximum possible advantage. In all of this, the only person she truly cares about is herself.