If you’re close to a narcissist, you’ve probably noticed their criticism. They may criticize your appearance, your hobbies and interests, and even your family and friends. Almost nothing is off-limits.

You may find that you don’t wash the dishes properly or don’t put them away properly. When you cook a meal, it’s either overcooked or under cooked.

After a while, you feel like the narcissist is looking for things to criticize and wants any excuse.

Why do narcissists criticize so much? In this article, I’ll explore the main reasons why narcissists criticize…

To Feel Superior

Narcissists get satisfaction from criticism because it makes them feel superior to the person they’re belittling.

Narcissists suffer from delusions of superiority, but they may not have the accomplishments to prove it. To compensate, narcissists may belittle others to raise their own standards. This, in their view, compensates for their own lack of accomplishments.

Related : Why Narcissists Change Their Name

Narcissists feel accomplished when they put others down, especially if they are more successful than them. This allows them to feel superior to the person they are belittling. Therefore, the more successful the person they criticize, the more superior they feel.

To Bring You Down

Criticizing people weakens them because they feel embarrassed, ashamed, and less capable than they actually are. This helps narcissists.

Narcissists love to control relationships. Criticizing people is one of their tools for controlling them. Imagine this…

A confident, capable, and comfortable person is difficult to control. An insecure and unsure person is much easier.

So, narcissists don’t care about robbing people of their self-esteem by constantly criticizing them. They only care about controlling relationships. Unfortunately, narcissists don’t care what this does to their “loved ones.” They only care about what they can take away from them.

I’m Not Perfect

At the beginning of relationships, narcissists often idealize their partners. They find them perfect enough for someone as great as themselves. But the longer they get to know them, the more flaws they inevitably discover.

Instead of accepting that people aren’t perfect, narcissists focus on their own flaws. The more they see, the more frustrated they become, increasing the frequency and intensity of their criticism.

They Enjoy Hurt Your Feelings

The more vicious narcissists are, the more they enjoy hurting others. And know that criticizing someone achieves this.

Some narcissists frame their criticism as “tough love.” This allows them to get away with criticizing people over and over again, without alienating them. They’re fooled into believing the narcissist has their best interests at heart.

Remember, there are ways to tell people things without hurting their feelings. Or at least you can mitigate the pain, rather than forcefully intervening.

Someone who insists on being “cruel” without being asked probably doesn’t have your best interests at heart, especially if they don’t counterbalance this with compliments and encouragement.

Jealousy

Narcissists become jealous very easily. They may be jealous of the accomplishments of others, even their family and friends.

Related : How “Toxic Empathy” Plays Into Narcissists Hands

So, a narcissist may criticize your successes, making them seem insignificant, or tell you that you were lucky, just to assuage their fears.

Narcissists are hesitant in their thinking. When you achieve some success, they fear that you might be “better” than them and might take control of the relationship. Their instinct is to destroy you. Then you’ll no longer be a threat.

Criticism Is Easy

Many narcissists are lazy and don’t bother to put in the effort necessary to succeed. But they still want to excel.

Many narcissists prefer to sit back and criticize others who are doing their best, while they do nothing themselves.

Narcissists find solace in the fact that, despite having accomplished nothing, they haven’t made any mistakes. This convinces them that they are perfect. They easily forget that mistakes are inevitable when trying difficult things.

In the eyes of narcissists, their lack of mistakes makes them superior to you. They delude themselves that if they tried, they would be better than you.

To_Stir_Up_Arguments

Some narcissists deliberately provoke criticism to provoke controversy. Controversy is their ultimate goal.

Many narcissists enjoy serious arguments because they feed their need for drama and provide them with much-needed attention—even if it’s negative. So, they may continue to criticize you, just to provoke you.

Narcissists may also feel powerful in arguments. If they know that certain criticisms upset you, they have a way of controlling you because they can provoke you with words whenever they want.

To_Make_You_Look_Crazy

Some narcissists want their partners to appear crazy in public. Then, no one will believe them if they reveal their true colors behind closed doors.

Some narcissists resort to emotional abuse to achieve this. They repeatedly criticize their partners until they finally break down. Then they throw up their hands as if the reaction came out of nowhere.

Related : What Narcissists Say To Win You Back

Unfortunately, many narcissists are adept at skillfully criticizing their partners and uncovering their sensitive vulnerabilities. This can give the impression that their partners explode with anger for no reason, and are therefore unstable and untrustworthy.

Conclusion

With narcissists, you’re in a no-go situation. They may initially admire your good qualities, but eventually, they become competitive and jealous, seeking to tear you down.

At the same time, they inevitably discover your flaws and hate the fact that you’re not perfect, because you’re not the best representative for them.

In short, they hate your qualities and flaws. So you can’t win!

Narcissists benefit so much from criticizing their loved ones that it becomes a habit. They may even criticize for no particular reason. But if you ever dare criticize them, it could ignite World War III!