If you leave a narcissist, this may not be the last you hear from them, especially if they haven’t found a replacement.

Most narcissists are forced to stay in a relationship because they need constant attention and validation.

So they resort to devious tactics to get someone back. Ultimately, they don’t care about what’s best for you; they only care about what’s best for them. And because they’re exploitative, staying in a relationship always pays off.

So narcissists use manipulation to convince their ex-partner to take them back, because they can’t do it with dignity. Here are some of the things narcissists say to get their partners back…

You Won’t Find A Better

Narcissists say this to plant seeds of doubt in your mind, hoping to have depleted your self-esteem enough to make you believe it.

The narcissist hopes your insecurities will push you to get back with them because you don’t feel you deserve someone better than them, who will treat you better. Furthermore, you may feel you deserve their harsh treatment.

Related : What Is A Narcissistic Collapse?

Believe me, you can be much better than any narcissist. Because they don’t care about you, and they never will. They only care about what they can take from you. So, it’s never in your best interest to be with them.

You Alone Save Me

Narcissists may give the impression that you alone can save them. So, they need you to survive. But this is a deliberate attempt to manipulate you on many levels.

Some narcissists become dependent on their partners. They make an implicit agreement that they are responsible for their care. As caregivers.

They hope to guilt you into returning to them. They encourage fear that something bad will happen to them if you stop caring for them. It’s like abandoning a child. This tactic also plays on your ego. The narcissist puts you on a high, claiming you’re the only person on earth who can save them. But this is a lie, and it makes no sense.

First of all, if they truly believed this, they would treat you better. Additionally, you’re probably not the best therapist on earth. So, there are probably plenty of people who could help them as much as you, if not more.

Narcissists say, “Only you can save me,” to lure you into fearing the consequences of them not coming back. This makes you feel responsible for any harm that may come to you, even if it’s your own doing.

Always remember, you’re not responsible for anyone else. You’re not a mature adult. You’re only responsible for yourself. So, if a narcissist chooses not to take care of themselves, that’s their responsibility. You can’t be expected to protect them 24/7.

Im Sick

Similarly, narcissists may claim to have a serious illness. They hope to trigger your emotions, making you feel guilty for leaving them.

Related : How Narcissists Use Double Binds Against You

Claiming they have a life-threatening illness lowers your guard. It’s natural to feel empathy, even for those who have harmed you. Therefore, you’re less likely to maintain your boundaries.

Even if this tactic doesn’t work immediately, it usually opens up communication channels, giving them the opportunity to try other tricks to win you back.

You’ve_Changed

Narcissists may openly claim they’ve changed, or they may hint at it through their actions.

They may, for example, go to therapy. Not because they want to change, but to “prove” it, even if they aren’t truly committed to it. They may decide they’ve found a religion. Or they may get a new job, if that was a problem before.

Unfortunately, narcissists rarely change permanently for the better, even though they may appear to.

They may act very nice while trying to win you back. They may continue this for the first few weeks while they regain their balance. But, just as is often the case when they fall in love, they eventually return to normal once they get what they want.

We Are Soulmates

Narcissists often delude their partners into believing they’re soulmates, kindred spirits, or otherworldly connections. But this isn’t the romantic gesture it may seem.

Narcissists often claim you’re soulmates, creating the impression that you have an unbreakable bond. This makes you less likely to leave them, no matter how badly they treat you. Who would willingly give up such a divine bond?

Just remember, the term “soulmates” is a hoax. Even narcissists don’t believe it. That’s why they treat you this way and repeat the same nonsense to all their partners.

Remember The Good Times

Narcissistic relationships aren’t all bad, because they know they have to please their partners every now and then to keep them happy.

So they may talk about the beautiful places you’ve visited together and even send photos and videos of the “good times.”

This is a deliberate ploy to stir up your emotions, making you focus on the good times, while forgetting the bad times you’ve been through.

Related : How Echoism Turns You Into A Narcissist Magnet

So remember, no matter how you decide to forgive, never forget the hard times you went through. Because that was the reality of the situation. And the same thing will happen in the future. Why not?

For The Kids

Although a narcissist didn’t care about their children during the relationship, they suddenly care. They claim to want to save the relationship for the sake of the children.

But if they truly cared, they would treat you better and maintain the relationship, instead of taking care of themselves all the time.

Sadly, this is a ploy to get you back. This is often demonstrated by their attempt to spend more time with you than with their children when they visit. They may also stop these visits if they feel they aren’t getting any benefit from you.

I Will Kill Myself If You Don’t Accept Me

Some narcissists even threaten to commit suicide if you don’t accept them, or they may hint at it. This is another attempt to make you feel responsible for them and worry about their safety if you don’t behave.

But the truth is, they are adults, and it’s their responsibility to take care of themselves, not yours.

It’s unrealistic and unfair to be held hostage and expected to dedicate your life to “rescue” them, especially when they wouldn’t do the same for you.

Conclusion

All of these tactics have one goal in common: They’re designed to trigger your emotions.

It’s well-known in psychology that when you’re in an emotional state, your logic breaks down, and you make bad decisions.

Related : The Hidden Costs Of Narcissists In Your Life

When a narcissist wants you back, they try to lure you into making bad decisions. Instead of giving you space to make a rational decision that’s best for both of you.

This shows that deep down, they know your life is better without them. It also shows that they don’t care about what’s best for you; only what they can take from you. So, remember this if a narcissist tries to use these manipulation tactics to get you back.