That’s it. Enough. You’ve learned to put up with them for too long, and it’s time to take a stand and speak up.

Finally, the narcissist is in your metaphorical crosshairs, and you’re ready to confront them.

You confront them—too late—but, wait…

…you quickly discover that the confrontation was a complete waste of time.

But why?

I have 13 reasons to help you.

Your Time Is Precious

I know you want to be able to use it wisely, but there won’t be much of that while the narcissist is around.

Related : 16 Scary Things Narcissists Do

What you see as precious, they don’t mind wasting and making you feel worse than you already did.

1 They Don’t Listen

Whenever you entertain the idea of ​​confronting a narcissist, you’ll sometimes find that they don’t listen.

They don’t want to hear what you have to say if it’s not helpful to them, and half the time they decide to ignore you, it’s because they think you’ll somehow pull away if they refuse to listen.

Is this any different from every other time you’ve tried to talk to them? They never listen anyway.

2 You Won’t Feel Better

Victims of narcissistic abuse always think there’s going to be improvement when they talk to their narcissist.

They try so hard to find ways to get their point across, and it can feel like a long-winded attempt to anticipate the conversation and how it’s going to go.

And so you do. You try to talk, and you talk about a problem that’s been bothering you for a long time.

Listen—no matter what answer you get, no matter what mood you’re in—it won’t improve your mood.

You won’t hear the words, “Oh my God, this was worth putting myself in danger for.”

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It won’t be worth it, because you won’t feel the relief you deserve after the conversation.

3 They’ll Deny

What are you saying?

I don’t even know what you mean.

Your words don’t make sense.

This never happened.

A narcissist’s denial will be powerful. Remember, this is what they’re used to, and this is their way of defending themselves.

It’s no different when you try to confront them.

4 Wait for Revenge

Because I’m telling you right now, revenge is coming.

Confronting any narcissist is not risk-free, and while you’re risking everything, they’ll make you pay for it in some way.

Related : 7 Ways To Move a Narcissist Out of Your House!

Revenge can be anything from silence, to yelling, to physical abuse, to spreading lies or rumors about you.

I know it sounds dramatic, but remember who we’re talking about here. We’re talking about some of the most dramatic people.

It makes perfect sense that they’d try to throw some of that at you.

5 People You Love Will Disappear

Your words to the narcissist will turn into horrible rumors about you.

I felt verbally attacked.

They were extremely aggressive.

They completely misunderstood me.

I don’t know what else to do.

They seemed pretty nice at first.

All it takes is planting a few seeds for the people you love and trust to think differently about you.

And trust me when I say that will happen to as many people as the narcissist can find and manipulate.

6 Prepare for Anger

Any narcissist should wear a T-shirt that says “My Anger Is All Anger.” In the world of narcissists, this is what they are truly known for. And unfortunately, you are the one who will bear the brunt of it.

I don’t want that for you, so this should be on your list of reasons why confronting them is a waste of time.

They get angry for one reason:

You upset them.

Related : Devastating Mistakes I Made When Divorcing a Narcissist

Don’t get me wrong, you can upset them for a million reasons, but this is one of the most powerful ways to do it.

You’ve caught them. This anger is panic in disguise. They can’t panic because they know you’ll realize you’re right.

Instead, they cover up their fear by reasserting their power over you. Anger is the best way to do this.

7 Self-Projection

If you’re going to confront them about something, be prepared for self-projection.

Projection statements might sound like this:

You dare accuse me, and you’re solely responsible!

You confront me about this, and you’re responsible for it?!

Well, maybe I wouldn’t need an accusation if I were as honest as you claim.

Whatever it is, it’s your fault.

8 Better Use Your Energy for Your Advantage

It takes a lot of effort to confront a narcissist. I’ve seen how it affects others, and to be perfectly clear, that energy can be better used for your own advantage.

Be kind to yourself, and channel it toward your goal. Take some time for yourself.

Don’t let the narcissist siphon off your energy, because when they do, you’ll never get it back.

9 More Lies Are Coming Your Way

When you confront them with what you know to be the truth, be prepared for the lies to come crashing down on you at lightning speed.

Related : Narcissists Are Attracted To You When You Do These Things

It’s really just an excuse for narcissists to violently throw whatever they can at you, and it’s a very predictable way to tighten the noose around you needlessly.

10 Prolonged Conflict

Any confrontation of this magnitude is an invitation to a protracted conflict. Nothing will be resolved as long as you have this courage and remain with the narcissist.

They will immediately know that you are no longer a weak person, and moreover, they will know that their power is weakened when they are with you.

This will only lead to more problems.

11 Insulting Your Opinion

Will you listen to yourself?

How do you sleep at night when you are this rude?

A narcissist can, and will, deceive you as soon as you try to tell them the truth.

You can understand how they are trying to make you collapse when you feel ashamed for even expressing your opinion.

12 Psychological Manipulation: What are you talking about?

Are you confused?

Are you imagining things?

Are you exaggerating? Are you feeling overly sensitive today?

Be prepared for your reality to be shattered immediately as soon as you take the initiative to speak directly with the narcissist.

They are always ready for you, and this is no exception.

ItWon’tChangeThem

And that’s the crux of the matter.

It doesn’t matter what you say, or why you’re trying to say it.

Nothing will change.

A narcissist will always be a narcissist. And I know you want to say something to make a difference, but it won’t.