The constant magnetic pull that a narcissist uses to lure you in is exhausting.

You don’t want to be dragged into conflict. You don’t want to feel that tension, or prepare for battle.

You need a weapon, but it needs to be non-toxic. You need a voice where you probably don’t have one.

You need a statement.

The ultimate statement that will weaken any narcissist.

So, without further ado, can we…?

Is that all it takes? One statement?!

Believe it or not – yes.

There are things you can throw at narcissists over the months or years you’ve known them.

Phrases that come from anger such as:

Why do you insist on making me feel bad?

Why are you always so negative?

What have I done that’s wrong in your eyes?

Or phrases you say when you’re sad, such as:

I just want to be loved in your eyes.

I’m doing my best to make you see me.

I just want to get along.

I love you and I don’t want to lose you.

You can say all of these things, and what actually happens is that narcissists love knowing that you’ve fallen for their games. You’re emotionally invested in trying to make everything right.

Related : When You Stop Caring About The Narcissist They Will Do This!

But when it comes to this phrase… it’s “game over” for the narcissist.

What’sThePhrase?

All bets are off when you mumble the words:

I see you as you really are now.

Oh!

The narcissist’s power has been forcefully taken away from them, and there’s no way to get it back.

Furthermore, you can tell them straight up that you get it. You’ve been presented with enough evidence over time to conclude that the narcissist is, in fact, a narcissist.

No amount of manipulation, anger, denial, or revenge will change your mind. In fact, all this will do now is validate your thoughts!

Waking up and seeing the narcissist for who they are doesn’t necessarily happen overnight, but when it does, there’s no undoing for either you or them.

WhyThisWorksSoWell?

Think about it this way.

You’ve been playing chess for a long time, and your whole life depends on winning. The crowd has gathered, and your opponent has convinced them that you’re out of their league.

When you look away, your opponent makes a cunning move that leaves you feeling trapped, or that you’ll never win.

Piece by piece, they take half of your board until it feels like there’s nothing left.

Then the impossible becomes possible…

You see where you can move, and you know that when you do, the game is over.

You make your move.

Checkmate.

Your opponent is now helpless, and nothing they do will change the final outcome.

That statement is your checkmate.

What Does Powerlessness Look Like to a Narcissist

Let’s all take a step back, because it’s not going to be pretty.

Narcissists need power like they need air in their lungs. Without it, they’re truly nothing they secretly feel inside.

Without power, they’re nothing.

Remember Oz in The Wizard of Oz? The great, almighty voice of immortality and power?

He turns out to be a scared man, pretending all the time!

Narcissists are the same. When you don’t catch them, they’re happy. The moment you realize the truth, all that power is gone forever…

…and nothing stays the same.

Powerlessness looks like this:

Watching you become more independent and less dependent on them
Watching you defy their criticism and live the life you want no matter how hard they try to hold you back
Not knowing what you do from day to day when they’re used to watching you so closely

WhatYouCanDoWithYourNewfoundPower

Let me start by saying that a whole new world is opening up for you. I’m not kidding. Life is completely changing.

This is the power you’ve been missing out on; the power you wish you had back then to start confronting the narcissist, or rather, to start believing in yourself again.

You have options now.

Eyes that are open to narcissism are eyes that can find a whole new way to live. Can that be scary at first? Of course.

Anything new is scary.

But you can’t let that stop you from standing on your own two feet and starting to grow as a person without their influence and without them telling you that you can’t.

Related : 13 Painful Lessons You Need To Learn From Narcissists

Typically when people discover the real narcissist behind the charm, they:

Deciding that they want no contact. This is a really direct way of saying, “I don’t want you in my life anymore,” and it works for a lot of victims.

Slowly, they start to distance themselves from the narcissist. As you evolve, you’re going in a different direction from where you were once rooted.

You start finding more reasons to leave. From the evidence you find, the memories you have, the research you do about narcissism—you build your own case.

They become very skilled at building their boundaries again. And surprisingly, this is easy once you know the truth, because you know it wasn’t you to begin with.

NothingStaysThe Same

How could this happen? How could something so complicated stay the same when you realize that the person you loved, cared for, and trusted—is a liar?

It was all a lie.

There was never any love.

There was never any trust.

And that doubt or sadness you’ve always felt was because of something.

Be Prepared for Anything!

What usually follows discovering the truth about any narcissist is the possibility of real personal explosions!

Think about the person closest to you, and whether the narcissist has any kind of influence on the way they think or feel. It could be because they are trying to manipulate you.

They will try to hurt you with their words like never before. Never rule out any narcissist being as cruel as possible. Remember – they want to see you miserable and will do whatever it takes.

When a narcissist feels helpless, they will find it difficult to hide their contempt for you. What can hurt you even more is that you may have experienced this with a parent or sibling. On paper, people close to you should never hurt you, but unfortunately many do, and it can make you feel like you’re responsible for it. That’s exactly what they want you to believe. Don’t believe them.

You are capable of this. It is much better to see the narcissist for who he really is, rather than continuing to pretend that he is a good person who really cares about you.