Will a Narcissist Come Back After Dumping You?

Being in a relationship with a narcissist is emotionally draining, so when a narcissist breaks up with you, it can feel like a godsend.

You’re now free from controlling behaviors, degrading comments, and constant manipulation.

Unfortunately for you, narcissists don’t like being alone; they’re always looking for a source of supply, someone who can make them feel better about themselves.

Sometimes they find a new source, but more often than not, they come back to you.

Related : Do Narcissists Regret Divorce?

Do narcissists come back after being dumped? Yes! They often come back after ending a relationship if there’s still enough supply left for them.

Why do narcissists come back after being dumped?

As with all questions about a narcissistic ex, the answer is “it depends.”

The circumstances of the breakup, your ex’s mental health and self-esteem, and your willingness to communicate with the narcissist after the relationship all play a role.

Why do narcissists come back?

While narcissists have an exaggerated sense of pride, they won’t hesitate to get back into a relationship if they think it will benefit them.

This is especially true if they can make it seem like they’re getting you back, doing you a favor.

They’re always looking for a source of supply and if they can get it while making you feel like they’re the more emotionally mature and forgiving person in the relationship, all the better.

However, many narcissists take the approach of acting as if nothing happened.

They’ll come back into your life as if the breakup never happened. Not only does this give them an enormous sense of power, it also weakens you mentally and emotionally.

Their actions make no sense, making it difficult for you to understand what’s real.

Are you misremembering that fight? Are you sure he left you (or you left him)? Narcissists thrive on your confusion because it gives them control over what’s real.

How long does it take for a narcissist to get back?

There’s no definitive answer to this; It can take a week, a month, or even years.

Narcissists don’t have a timeline, they just have alternate sources of supply. When those sources run out, they look for more.

It’s safe to say that the longer you’re with a narcissist, the longer you’ll be wondering, “Will they come back after they dumped you?”

The longer you’re in a relationship, the longer the narcissist has had to learn your quirks and how to control you.

They feel comfortable in your toxic relationship, so it’s always easier to come back than to find someone new.

WhyDoNarcissistsComeBackWhenYou’reStrong Again?

Narcissists love you at your best. In the initial phase of a relationship,

They idealize you, love to shower you with compliments, and tell you how great you are and how great they feel because of you. But it’s the last part of that statement that really matters to the narcissist;

The longer you’re with them, the less they feel.

Over time, they begin to devalue you and in doing so, they eliminate your ability to make them feel better about themselves.

Once they devalue you enough, they no longer need you and eventually get rid of you.

Breaking up resets the entire cycle, especially if you have the time and strength to restore your mental health to what it was before the narcissistic relationship.

You are once again the shining source of narcissistic supply, ready to be idealized, devalued, and discarded again.

What Makes a Narcissist Move After a Breakup?

As always, this depends on a number of factors. The first and most important is who initiated the breakup?

If the narcissist initiated the breakup, the breakup may simply be a show of power or a final disposal.

The show of power is designed to force you into a position of submission—you will ask for forgiveness, compliment them, and provide a source of supply.

Related : Are Female Narcissists Different Than Male Narcissists? 10 Tactics Used By The Female Narcissist

In a way, this type of breakup is the narcissist’s cry for help because he or she is not getting what he or she wants from the relationship (admiration, sex, and control).

If you don’t give the narcissist what he or she wants after the breakup (i.e. submission), he or she will change tactics and may even ask you to forgive him or her.

But if the narcissist is finally getting rid of everything, he or she may not contact you for months. He’s moved on to his next target and has no use for you.

He may reach out to you months later when he has a need for supply that hasn’t been met in his current relationship, but it doesn’t take long for his attention to shift elsewhere.

What to Expect After a Narcissist Breakup

There’s really no guide to how things will go after a breakup with a narcissist.

How things go depends on the narcissist’s needs and how willing you are to meet those needs.

But in all cases, the narcissist needs supply and needs his ego repaired (even if it’s at your expense).

How Does a Narcissist React When You Leave Him?

If you were the one who initiated the breakup, your narcissistic partner is likely filled with anger.

You’ve blown a hole in his ego and destroyed his self-esteem—and the only way to fix that is to destroy you.

Narcissists have a variety of dirty tricks they’ll use to bring you down, including smear campaigns involving mutual friends, stalking, and luring you back into the relationship only to break up with you.

Whatever the situation, the primary motivation for a narcissist after a breakup is to find a new source of supply or reclaim their old one by luring you back in.

The solution? No contact, cutting off all lines of communication.

A narcissist needs supply and if they can’t reach you, there’s no chance of receiving it.

Do Narcissists Come Back After No Contact?

Whether a narcissist will come back after you cut off contact is the most pressing concern, at least initially.

Your tactic has almost certainly made them angry and they will do anything to regain control of the relationship.

This doesn’t mean that cutting off contact is a bad idea; if they continue to communicate after you break up, they will almost certainly tempt you back in.

Whether it’s through love bombing, insults, or begging for a second chance.

There’s a high chance you’ll get back at the narcissist.

Cutting off the lines of communication leaves the narcissist with fewer options to control you.

If you don’t talk to them, the narcissist will try to recruit your family, friends, or even coworkers to get you back.

A lot of times, the narcissist will act hurt, as if they don’t understand why the breakup happened in the first place.

In doing so, they may also smear you, mentioning all the things you did wrong in the relationship (real or not).

The narcissist wants you to feel like there’s no escape and that the only way to fix things is to get back at them.

However, if you do get back at the relationship, don’t expect flowers and chocolates. They’ll make you pay for the pain they felt and the effort they put into getting you back.

If your no-contact attempt works, you’re not out of the woods yet.

Just because the narcissist leaves you alone for a while doesn’t mean they won’t come back.

As mentioned earlier, narcissists come after you when you’re at your best. You are more valuable to them after you get your life back in order.

Related : 10 Reasons Why The Narcissist Hates You

This is when they will hound you, saying “you were good together” and “they don’t even know why you broke up in the first place.”

Time heals all wounds and helps you forget the pain the narcissist caused. Don’t let them creep back in after your no contact attempt has been successful.

Do Narcissists Come Back After the Silent Treatment?

The silent treatment is usually a tactic used by the narcissist.

While fighting can eventually lead to a resolution, the silent treatment never solves anything.

A narcissist may go weeks without speaking to you, with the implication that you need them more than they need you. You will be the one begging for forgiveness and giving in to their demands.

Sometimes the silence never ends. They walk away and never speak to you again.

While you won’t get any closure, consider yourself lucky if it does. Often, the narcissist will remain silent for a while, then return as if nothing had happened.

Maybe he found a new source of supply but he fell out with them and now he needs something from you.

Your best bet is to ignore him the way he ignored you before. Being silent with him lets him know that you are not a viable source of supply.

How long can a narcissist go without contact before they contact you again?

Unfortunately, there is no good answer to this question. Some can come back immediately after a breakup, while others may take months or years. It is not uncommon for a narcissist to cycle through multiple exes.

In general, narcissists often try to get back into their exes. They usually do this when they want more attention or can take advantage of the other person.

They often test your resolve, coming into your life to see if you have forgotten how toxic your relationship was and if you are vulnerable enough to take them back.

But remember, every narcissist is different.

Do Narcissists Always Come Back?

Narcissists tend to revisit their old relationships, but that’s not a given.

They may cut you off completely. At the time, it can be very painful, but they’re actually doing you a huge favor (even if they’re doing it for themselves).

They’re unlikely to come back to you if they find a steady source of supply.

In a way, their loss (being with the narcissist) is your gain. Narcissists don’t usually stay in lasting relationships, so there’s a good chance you’ll see them again when the next one fails.

Does a Narcissist Regret Losing You?

Your narcissistic ex can’t care about you, they only care about how you made them feel.

They regret losing a partner the way you might regret losing a car — it was something that was good for you and you’ll need to find another to get over it.

The narcissist will almost certainly say they regret losing you. They will do anything necessary to get you back in a relationship with them.

This is all a form of control, and the narcissist will quickly lose the facade of appreciation and revert to their old ways.

How to Break Up with a Narcissist and Stay Breaking Up?

Recognize that you are in a relationship with a narcissist.

Recognize that as a narcissist, they are unlikely to change (they don’t want to).

Break up with the narcissist, but be prepared for the short-term consequences.

If the narcissist is nearing the final stage of getting rid of you, let it happen.

Regardless of who initiated the breakup, do not contact them again. Keep this up even if the narcissist tries to reconnect with you months or years later.

Related : What Happens When a Narcissist Loses in Court?

Start the healing process. A relationship with a narcissist can be incredibly damaging to your self-esteem. Seeking out a professional to guide you through the process is always a good idea.

Ending a relationship with a narcissist is never easy. There is a good chance that they will come back to you at some point,

And while they may say they have changed, this is just a ploy to get you back under their control. Once you’re out of the relationship, stay out and don’t look back.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *