Long-term relationships require honesty and trust. These two things go hand in hand in a healthy relationship.

Narcissists come hand in hand with deception. They come as a package deal. Narcissists’ lives are focused on self-preservation, and they will say anything to stay relevant and influential.

Narcissists live in a web of lies, prioritizing their own interests over honesty. If you’re wondering why narcissists can’t be honest, it’s because it’s all about them and what they need to do and say to appear important and powerful and boost their ego.

1 Need for Control

Narcissists have a need for control. They need to control their partners and control others. Controlling and controlling others makes them feel superior, which boosts their ego. They believe they are more important than everyone else, including their family and partners.

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Deception comes naturally, and plays a central role in their need for control. When they are honest, their flaws will be exposed. They lie to make themselves look good, to make themselves appear superior and important.

2 Entitlement

Narcissists feel entitled. They believe they are more important and superior to everyone around them. It’s all about self-importance. In their eyes, no one else is as important or perfect as them.

While this isn’t reality, it’s what they think, honesty doesn’t work for them, as lying provides them with the benefits of entitlement.

They will lie about anything to make themselves look perfect. This includes lying about you, their successes, their life, their work, and anything else they can think of.

They are compulsive liars; unfortunately, most of what they say isn’t true. This makes it very difficult to be in a relationship with a narcissist, as you need to be able to trust them.

3 Low Self-Esteem

Did you know that narcissists have low self-esteem? This is why they need to feel more important and superior to everyone else. This is what drives them to be manipulative liars and get the recognition they need.

Narcissists act on how they feel right now, hiding their insecurities.

This is what drives their inability to be honest. If they were honest, they would expose their insecurities and would not be able to hide their lack of self-esteem. Lying is as natural to narcissists as the air we breathe.

4 Lack of Empathy

Narcissists will never be able to put themselves in your shoes. They lack empathy. They can’t understand your feelings; they will never put themselves in your shoes to try to understand what you’re going through. As a result, they see nothing wrong with lying to get what they want and need.

Without any compassion, they will lie about anything to gain validation of their importance. They are the only ones who matter to them. Even if you’ve been in a relationship with a narcissist for decades, they will still think they are superior to you and will only think about themselves.

5 Defense Mechanism

Unfortunately, narcissists can’t stand to look or feel bad about themselves or anything they’ve done, and they often resort to lying as a defense mechanism. Why? It’s all about making themselves look better to those around them and to themselves.

They use lies to cover their tracks and avoid confrontation when they’re caught red-handed. You may have caught them lying about where they were or what they were doing. To cover up, they will lie even more. They often exaggerate their lies to make you believe what they are saying.

6 Manipulation

For a narcissist, it’s all about manipulation. They manipulate you and situations to gain control.

Being dominant by nature, they need control to feel better about themselves. They are self-important, superior, and complete. Through manipulation, they can remain important, and control everything about you.

Those who have been in a relationship with a narcissist or are currently in one will know how to manipulate things to get what they want.

This is to ensure that all of your attention is focused on them. Lying is easy for them, which helps them manipulate you and those around you.

7 They Don’t See It as Wrong

You’re probably not lying. If you are, it’s probably a little white lie to protect someone you care about or love. Narcissists lie about everything. They don’t see it as wrong. Lying is a means to an end for them.

Narcissists are often compulsive liars. They can add facts to their stories, making them seem more believable.

It is not uncommon for their partners to question their sanity, and struggle to remember how something happened, because the narcissist adds and distorts facts in their disbelief.

8 Gain Attention

If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, you know how they want you to focus all of your attention on them. They need to be the center of attention. They need you to focus on them, making them feel important and special.

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When gaining attention, they will use lies to get emotional responses from others. They do not like it when they are not the star of the show, whether at home, at work, or in a social setting.

Lying helps them socialize and connect with others, and helps them build friendships and relationships, which helps them gain the attention they need.

Dealing With a Narcissist’s Lies

Living with someone who rarely tells the truth can be exhausting. When they do speak, you’re constantly trying to figure out what’s true and what’s not. You’ve probably reached a point where you think everything that comes out of their mouth is a lie.

There are a few things you can do to deal with a narcissist’s lies. The first is to remind yourself of the truth. When your narcissistic partner is blatantly lying, reminding yourself of the truth will reduce the risk of falling for their lies.

Keep in mind that when a narcissist lies, they want what they’re lying to be true. They believe it’s true; therefore, you can’t change them, in the same way that a leopard can’t change its spots.

They lie to disarm and weaken you so they can control you. For this reason, you need to remember the truth and know what kind of person you’re dealing with.

Narcissists lack empathy; they don’t care about how you feel about their lies. As a result, it’s up to you to stay calm and keep the truth in your head. When they lie to you, as long as you know the truth about yourself, they won’t get the upper hand and control they need.

Keep your support base close. Talking to a close friend or family member can often help you remember who you are and remind you of the truth.

This can be invaluable when dealing with narcissistic dishonesty. Don’t let them win. Be honest with yourself and be honest with who you are.