Narcissists don’t like anyone to know that certain things are driving them crazy.

They prefer to expose their fake selves to the world, and save their moods for those closest to them – usually behind closed doors.

If it’s behind closed doors, it’s your word against theirs, right?

If you really want to know what gets under a narcissist’s skin to drive them absolutely crazy, I’ve got the perfect list for you.

Remember – simply being you can get them in the way, and the stronger you are, the more stressed the narcissist becomes!

YouStandAtYourBoundaryFort

It’s taken years to build the kind of fortress that will protect you from people who are trying to destroy you or take over your life.

Related : 7 Narcissist Hobbies that are Instant Red Flags

You’re there, in the fortress, and you see the narcissist approaching.

Do you run for cover? Do you see them inside and tell them to get comfortable?

No!

It may have happened to you once – but it did so much damage that you promised never to do it again.

They’ll be mad when they know they can’t affect you the way they once did. Panic will set in as they desperately search for more supplies.

What will they do now?

ControlFade

Narcissists cling to control like it’s solid gold in a hurricane. Their grip is tight because they fear that every day they have it will ultimately be their last.

Control isn’t something they’re supposed to own, you see. It belongs to the person who took it from them. Instead of being a good citizen and giving it back, they steal and celebrate with sleight of hand.

Their biggest fear is loss. At some point in their lives, it happened to them to become this way. Losing control over you is a trigger for them that they can’t do anything about.

You Don’t Believe Their Love

If you’re confident, with moderate levels of self-esteem, there should be no reason for you to fall for their love.

Their love works best when the person feels flattered that someone is giving them attention. They absorb it because it feels good (who doesn’t feel good about the promise of the world?)

Empaths love to hear nice things. As people with good, compassionate energy, they assume that all good things are true. It’s not in their nature to assume the worst in people. Empaths love, and tend to see beyond a person’s negative traits.

So if a narcissist comes along and they love bomb, an empath won’t see the motive behind it.

Learning not to believe them can be a challenge. Once you see what’s coming, you can avoid it.

Think of it as a bit like an emotional dodgeball game.

Giving them the least

Your irresponsible behavior with a narcissist will drive them crazy. Not only will they not be able to convince you to get into a fight, but they won’t find it possible to lure you into making unnecessary apologies.

Related :Things Narcissists Will Never Do

The gray rock is what you think of when you see a gray rock.

It blends in with the gray rock.

It offers nothing.

It doesn’t have much to offer.

In conversation, this is the key to disarming a narcissist. They can tease and tease you all they want, but you won’t respond.

It’s a form of control that takes practice. It can be difficult at first to find the patience to sit through a narcissist’s face this way, but once you get the hang of it – it’s very effective.

CancelPlans

Cancel our trip?

Can’t do it?

Change your mind?

Would you rather do something else with someone else?

Yes – all of these things come from the center of the narcissistic soul. You should feel proud that the narcissist wanted to see you in the first place. Now you have the courage to walk away?

Related : Things Narcissists Do at the End of a Relationship

Don’t think the narcissist will forgive you, and don’t ever think they will forget either.

Narcissists hold grudges like a child holds cotton candy at a summer fair.

They won’t let you go.

Of course, you have the right to cancel. Sometimes things come up, sometimes you feel tired. Priorities change.

But if you make something else a priority over the narcissist – there will be a problem!

Success

You may think that good things or good news will make your loved ones feel happy. Family, friends and your spouse will unite to make you feel proud of your accomplishments.

You will be asked questions.

You must be thrilled?

How great is this news?

Tell us about it!

No.

Forget it.

Nothing disgusts a narcissist more than someone getting all the attention. If you’re successful at something, it will be there. If not, people will ask questions.

Related : Things That Make Narcissists Lose Their Mind

But don’t expect them to engage in any flattery. They don’t want to know anything about you or your news. They want to try to find something going on in their lives to steal your shine (and yes – this happens all the time!)

happypeople

What makes them so happy?

I work hard and look at them – they’ve got it all.

My goodness. It’s a good thing for some people.

Happy people are happy because they naturally exude light. That light is not something a narcissist ever possesses, unless they steal it from you.

It’s baffling to any narcissist how someone can be so carefree and carefree. Sadly, his character can’t understand happiness without:

Happy People

What makes them so happy?

I work hard and look at them – they have it all.

Oh my. That’s a good thing for some people.

Happy people are happy because they naturally exude light. That light is never something a narcissist has, unless they steal it from you.

It’s baffling to any narcissist how someone can be so carefree and carefree. Sadly, his character can’t understand happiness without:

Vacations.

Control.

Making sure others are miserable.

Seeing others get what they want

Narcissists want everything to happen to them. They want to be the winners of the competition. They want to be invited to that party. They want the new neighbors to talk to them first. They want their soccer team to win.

If everyone else happens to be first every time? That will drive them crazy.

In fact, they will act like they don’t care.

We think they protest a lot…

Independence

If you go out and do your own thing without the need or inclination to tell them first – the narcissist will hate it.

Independent people are a threat. They have everything the narcissist secretly craves.

Narcissists can’t function without others around them. The supply they need is constant. The approval they need is daily. The validation they seek is constantly being pursued.

Related : 8 Things a Narcissist Will Never Tell You

So seeing you treat life like a big piece of cake and live by your own rules disgusts them.

You’re Sick

Stop making a fuss. You’re fine.

Do you want to see a sick person? You should have seen me a few weeks ago.

Actually, you say you’re sick but I feel bad too.

My back hurts again.

They can’t stand it. It’s really funny if you can ignore the sheer audacity with which they treat you like a burden just because you have the flu or a stomach virus.

Being sick means people will pay attention to you. They will ask about you instead of the narcissist.

Not being the center of attention?

Yes – this is a real trigger that is sure to send the narcissist into a spin!