Hi Evie. My boyfriend (24) has been talking about applying to be on a reality TV show where couples’ loyalty and commitment to each other are tested. Without naming names, I’m sure you’ve seen this show before or at least heard about it. He’s been training and trying to build up his online following to have a better chance of getting on the show, but I don’t see the point. Most of the time, people end up cheating and I don’t see why we should put ourselves through that (especially on TV). He says it’s going to be an adventure but deep down I think he just wants to be famous and have fun. I’m younger than him (22) but I already feel like I want to settle down and work towards our future. How can I convince him that a decision like this could be the end of us? I’ve told him several times that I’m not a fan of the idea but he won’t give up on it. – Marta, UK
Dear Marta,
Thank you for writing. I’m going to be very honest here – your boyfriend’s obsession with this reality TV show is a big red flag. It’s not just about the show – it’s about what it says about where his mind is. He’s putting his ego, his image, and the chance for his five minutes of fame above the relationship you’re trying to build together.
You’re right to be concerned.
These shows are designed to stir up drama, push boundaries, and create chaos for the sake of entertainment. If he’s willing to drag your relationship into this mess for what he calls an “adventure,” then his priorities are not where they should be. Let’s be real: This isn’t about testing loyalty. It’s about setting up situations where betrayal is almost inevitable, all for the sake of ratings.
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Your gut instinct is right. His desire to appear on this show isn’t just a harmless fantasy — it shows that he’s more interested in chasing attention and excitement than building something real with you. That’s not the mindset of someone ready to settle down or work seriously toward a future together.
You’ve already told him how you feel, and he’s still not backing down. That’s a pretty clear sign of his attitude. If he’s more interested in the idea of fame than he is in protecting your relationship, then you have a real problem on your hands.
So here’s the thing: Stop trying to convince him. Instead, set boundaries. Tell him that if he chooses to go this route, he chooses it over you. There’s no middle ground here. You deserve a partner who values you and your relationship more than the lure of some television spotlight. If he can’t see that, then you need to seriously consider whether this is the relationship you want to be in. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is step back and let someone make their own decision—even if it means walking away. You deserve someone who is fully engaged, not someone who gets distracted by whatever shiny object comes along.t
