Some people are just negative. They’re going through a tough time, and that’s tough.
But that’s not always the case.
In some situations, pessimistic people try to bring you down and ruin your sunny day.
Here’s how to spot pessimists and stop them from ruining your life.
10 Warning Signs Someone Is Trying to Bring You Down (And How to Stop Them)
Watch out for these signs.
Whether it’s a romantic partner, a friend, a family member, a coworker, or a friend, people who engage in this type of behavior are trying to bring you down.
1) They Focus on the Negative
Talking about and bringing up negative things is an important part of life.
You can’t solve a problem or work through it if you actively avoid mentioning or dealing with it.
Bad things happen!
Focusing on the negative is different.
It’s like wearing special sunglasses where all you can see is tragedy, sadness, and despair.
This is one of the biggest warning signs that someone is trying to bring you down:
They try to force you to wear the sunglasses you’re wearing, and when you say no, they start to burden you with negativity and judgment.
The solution: Just say no.
Eventually, you may have to physically walk away from them or tell them you have a headache and need to go.
2) They compete to be more “positive” than you
On the flip side of extreme negativity, there’s “toxic positivity.”
This annoying trend has gained a real foothold in the New Age community, especially because it’s encouraged by ill-considered ideas like the Law of Attraction.
These silly ideas tell people that you have to be positive all the time if you want good things to happen to you in life.
Ironically, someone being overly positive and trying to “outdo” you with positivity is one of the biggest warning signs that someone is trying to bring you down.
Noticing the great things in life is one thing!
Toxic positivity is something else entirely.
It’s trying to suppress your true feelings and feel guilty and shamed for others when they’re having a hard time or not in the cult of positivity.
Beware of this, it can be subtle!
3) They’re trying to derail you in your life
One classic warning sign that someone is trying to bring you down is that they’re trying to derail you in your life.
It can be very simple, but make no mistake:
These can be small comments that sow doubt in your heart about your career, your relationship, your values…
Insecure people love to find a weakness and then work to diminish it.
4) They’re playing you
Emotional manipulation is when you make someone doubt what they see or blame themselves for your problems.
One of the main warning signs that someone is trying to bring you down is that they love to manipulate you.
They’ll tell you that you’re wrong about everything, even what your eyes see and your ears hear.
They’ll make you doubt the existence of gravity and do all sorts of meaningless things.
This is the classic con artist profile:
Someone who tears others down and makes them question everything about their experiences, to reconstruct them as someone they can completely control and manipulate.
Contortionist teachers love to do this.
Don’t let anyone bring you down by making you hate yourself or distrust yourself.
5) They try to undermine your beliefs
It’s one thing to disagree with someone’s beliefs and tell them so.
It’s another thing to undermine someone’s beliefs and actively work to undermine them.
You can respectfully disagree without getting personal.
Unfortunately, one of the most annoying warning signs that someone is trying to dissuade you is that they take your beliefs and make them personal.
“I can’t understand why you think that,” they might comment sarcastically.
Or:
“I thought you were smarter and more open-minded than that,” for example.
What is this?
Bait.
They claim to have the moral high ground and hope you’ll swallow the bait so you can come down to earth with them and feel bad too, while you defend your beliefs.
Forget it. It’s not worth your time.
6) They compete in the Victim Olympics
The Victim Olympics is the opposite of fun.
The worse you are, the more gold medals you get.
This sick mindset has found itself at the intersection of all sorts of related ideologies. They use fancy words, but it boils down to:
If you don’t validate my pain and the beliefs I have that stem from that pain and experience, you’re evil.
This is one of the most common and annoying warning signs that someone is trying to project you onto:
They’re outdoing you as a victim.
Did your house burn down?
They were born orphans and their father was a drug addict!
Did you just break up?
They have an alternate gender identity that makes them feel insecure about their social acceptance, so your breakup is nothing compared to their pain.
Fun stuff.
Try to stay away from people who want you to compete in the victim’s Olympics.
The more gold medals you win, the worse your life will be.
7) They try to make you stressed and insecure
Life is already filled with many circumstances that test our confidence and resolve.
Many of the major warning signs that someone is trying to bring you down revolve around trying to make this worse.
They try to throw you off balance and doubt yourself…
Doubt your plans…
Doubt your friendships, relationships, and values.
These types of people want to capitalize on and magnify any inner imbalance you feel.
8) They try to destroy your reputation
It’s easier than ever to destroy someone’s reputation these days, thanks to the power of the internet.
If they haven’t done enough stupid or scary things for you to pull off, you can always resort to Photoshopping them and showing them doing something outrageous!
RELATED:Men who are deeply self-centered usually display these 8 behaviors (without realizing it)
This is one of the biggest warning signs that someone is trying to bring you down…
They stalk you, bully you online, talk bad about you, write negative reviews online about you or your work, etc.
They want to make your life worse and they use every tool at their disposal.
They can be incredibly difficult to stop.
One bad apple can send a person into a tailspin.
Just ask any journalist who works for a news agency. They want you to think that they don’t care about the angry emails they get and the random crazy people who yell at them on the phone.
Trust me:
They do care a lot. And it stresses them out.
9) They shame you for your appearance
Another alarming sign that someone is trying to bring you down is that they are bullying you for your appearance.
You are too fat, too skinny, too ugly, or too pretty.
There is something about you that is terrible, wrong, and horrible according to them.
Any insecurities you have are magnified the more they continue with these petty assaults.
If you’re like me, you don’t comment on people’s appearance in a negative way because it’s just disgusting and creepy.
But someone who’s trying to bring you down will do just that.
It’s not always verbal either.
Sometimes it’s a very obvious look of disdain at you and then they walk away from you like they’re going to throw up.
Message received.
Frankly, go to hell with these types of people.
10) They Play With Your Emotions
One of the most devastating warning signs that someone is trying to bring you down is that they’re just building you up to bring you down.
They play with your emotions.
This is very common in relationships and work environments.
One day it’s kind words and compliments, the next it’s just angry criticism and scolding.
You can’t keep up with it…
And that’s the point.
This person wants to make you confused, disoriented, and hopeless so they can manipulate you like a puppet on a string.
They want to control you and be the only one to give you a glimpse of hope or happiness when they decide you should have it.
Don’t let them do this!
Whenever you allow someone to be the one to bring you down, you also give them the only power to bring you back up.
This is the most powerful thing in you, so don’t give it up to anyone!
Don’t bring me down!
We all have bad days, as I said.
We all need a shoulder to cry on sometimes and other times to look back and apologize for over-expressing our sadness to others.
However, no one has the right to dump all their problems on someone else and make it their responsibility.
This is especially true in family relationships where this is more common, as well as romantic partnerships where people often think they have the right to use their partner as a blank check for endless sympathy and support.
Well, it doesn’t work that way!
Even the most understanding of us eventually has limits to what we can tolerate…
