People with a narcissistic victim mentality are well known for following various social patterns. If you have ever dealt with a person with pathological narcissism, you have probably noticed that whenever there is any form of disagreement, they tend to behave predictably. This post will delve into the diverse reasons behind why a narcissist plays the role of a victim.

Denial and delusion: the victim is a narcissist

Narcissists live in a fantasy world. The truth is impossibly painful for the narcissist, who spends his or her life running away from the crumbling true self and the intense shame associated with it.

The coping mechanism of narcissists is to deny reality and decide that their perception is reality. The problem is that the perception of a narcissist, based on his feelings, is skewed and devoid of logic.

Often, a narcissist believes in unreality. Other times they may realize that their version is not completely accurate but it will continue to push their narrative. As in life, the sooner you tell a story, the sooner you begin to believe that fantasy is real. Why does a narcissist play the role of a victim? Well, maybe they succeeded in deceiving themselves into believing that they are. While pity plays may not at first seem overtly harmful; they are classic examples of narcissistic abuse.

The victim cannot be the bad person

People with this personality disorder need to reframe the narrative and rely on the narcissistic victim mentality to survive. The idea, and the fact, that a narcissist is an uncaring, abusive individual who is incapable of love is not something his impossibly fragile sense of self can handle. Therefore, the narcissistic victim needs to find ways to avoid accountability.

One of the most effective ways to rewrite history is to appear as a sufferer. This basic dynamic enables the narcissist to assemble supporters, or the Narcissistic Supply, who believe that the narcissist is a poorly treated individual who needs empathy and protection. Playing this character is an ideal way for a narcissist to get on the show, as people tend to view the victim as vulnerable, which causes them to let down their guard.

While the narcissist is mastering the victim mask, they are also busy rewriting the story for their smear campaign. The defamation campaign comes straight from the textbook of examples of narcissistic abuse and is a systematic attempt to damage someone’s reputation by spreading harmful propaganda. The paradox is that the target of the narcissist’s smear campaign is the actual victim or the person who is most often abused in the first place. With the narcissist emerging as a harmless and pathetic individual, it is difficult to be convinced that the truth is the opposite of the situation presented.

Unless the narcissist’s supporter starts spending more dedicated time with them or reveals a fact that goes against the narcissist’s web of uncomfortable and undeniable lies, the narcissist is unlikely to be seen as the wrong person in the scenario. So, why does a narcissist play the victim role? Because he lets the narcissist off the hook in every possible way.

The victim is a hero

Examining why a narcissist plays the role of a victim is not as clear as it might seem at first. The narcissist’s depiction of a wounded individual lends itself to the anecdote that he was mistreated and misunderstood. Strangers begin to wonder about the terrible treatment to which the narcissist was subjected.

A narcissist can use the narcissistic victim mentality to his advantage and regret all the hardships they had to overcome to develop into the person they are today. Such manipulation is a lonely endeavor, devoid of consideration of the narcissist’s responsibility for affairs. Playing a victim of a narcissist enables them to present as a hero, a survivor of terrible events. By identifying oneself as the protagonist of the story, the narcissist can simultaneously fuel his ego and maintain the feelings of worthlessness that haunt him momentarily.

Is the narcissist a victim, though? Narcissistic victim mentality

The narcissist creates a very deliberate image of a wronged person; the question arises; is the narcissist, in fact, a victim of some kind? Why would a narcissist play the victim role, and so easily, if it’s not a role they can somehow identify with?

He presents the narcissist as a victim of the treatment they receive in adulthood. They take on the FA of an abused partner, a poorly treated employee, or a misunderstood individual cast aside by society. For the most part, however, this is pure delusion in the narcissistic mind.

A narcissist is a victim but not in the way they think themselves to be. They are a victim of a cruel childhood, which, it can be said, lacked unconditional love. However, the narcissist is now mainly a victim of their disorder. It is the disorder, and the condition alone, that causes such havoc in a narcissist’s life. Being incapable of introspection, however, the narcissist can never realize this fact and continues to play his victim.

To compensate for the inability to look inside, the narcissist automatically projects the pain caused by the disorder onto others. Once the narcissist is in full blame-shifting mode, with accusations flying around, their unreality and version of events transcend from emotion to facts. A narcissist trusts their feelings much more than hard, cold evidence.

So, why does a narcissist play the victim role?

Assessing why a narcissist plays the role of a victim is a question with multifaceted answers. For the average person, the narcissistic victim mentality is illogical. However, for a narcissist, taking on the role of a victim is a psychological way that is necessary for his survival. In survival mode, there is no real sympathy.

Playing the victim is an easy and lazy strategy that the narcissist knows has proven to be effective and has many advantages. The narcissistic victim has practiced, on autopilot, from a very young age. It is a sick form of genius, an effective manipulation and full of irony.