How An Astrology Reading Narrowly Saved Me From A Toxic Relationship

I discovered my love affair, and perhaps my entire life, through reading astrology. For this to make sense, you have to know what “transits” and “progresses” are in astrology. According to the Dictionary of Astrology, the definition of transit in astrology is: “the passage of a planet or celestial body relative to the position of another celestial body or celestial sector in the astrological chart.” According to Astrology Answers, the definition of progression in astrology is: “Progress is simply the way the planets move around your birth chart.”

In your birth chart, which tells you where all the planets were in the sky at the time and place you were born, you have a snapshot that describes you. But planets don’t stay in the same place forever. Keep moving. When where a planet is at the present moment is at an exact angle to where the planet is at the time of your birth, that planet is said to be “transiting” your natal planet.

Related: 7 Definite Signs That You’re In A Toxic Relationship And Need To Leave Now

The angle it forms, as well as the houses and signs of the planets involved, all have a specific meaning. In Progress, the astrologer moves the natal planet by a specific number of degrees, representing several years or months of life. For example, the Sun “progresses” by a degree for each year of your life, and any angles it makes reflect something that will happen that year.

It is generally believed that for something to occur, it must have a transitivity and development that reflects it. If the natal chart doesn’t show it’s possible, it won’t happen no matter what. Since I’m a new student of astrology, I haven’t been able to study millions of birth charts and figure out what each aspect means to me. Some people have been doing this for twenty years, and have interpreted natal charts by the thousands. Why did I decide to get an astrology reading all my life? It all started with a love triangle between me and two other people. I found myself saddened by this toxic relationship, and I wanted to know what would happen.

So, I purchased Liz Greene’s annual horoscope analysis of all three members of the triangle, every three years, for the next 30 years or so. This astrology chart explains that for those who haven’t bought one, choose the strongest 22 to 26 transits and progressions, with Liz Green’s thoughts on what they mean. After a lot of digesting and thinking about these three natal charts, something clicked for me.

The contradictory nature of the aspects was confusing, and it seemed like nothing positive or happy would happen to me. but why? My first clue had to do with my past experiences. Nearly four years ago, I was unceremoniously and painfully dumped. The man who dumped me (whom I was in a relationship with) decided he wanted to go to couples counseling to work things out with his partner (the third member of the triangle).

At this point, I was expecting to hear from this person in October 2017 and that he would get back to me for some advice. The transits and progressions I was reading in my astrological chart were all over the map until 2019. Suddenly, the transitions and progressions were split between being alone or having another toxic relationship.

And the natal charts of the other two people involved were pretty lackluster as well. The man’s scheme was stuck between two women once again. Another female chart shows that she has become aware of the presence of a competitor. I can only conclude from this, and the fact that the expected visit occurred in October 2017, that they are the same three people again (me, the man, and his partner). All of these transits agree with one exception. There is a very big Saturn, which was due to end in November 2018. It has been a very happy and stable transit relationship!

What was he doing there? I recognized this immediately because, while I was in this toxic relationship, a bunch of very happy transits including a Saturn and a Venus trine appeared in my birth report for the following year, along with some terrible transits.

Related: 13 Inescapable Signs Of A Dead-End, Toxic Relationship

Both his therapist and my therapist reflected optimism about the relationship. He seemed to be making good progress in therapy and I saw this set of happy traits and decided to stay in the relationship. But nothing happy happened, so he left me and went to counseling with the other woman.

All the terrible transits predicted for the next four years have happened to me. I started studying birth chart astrology and learned a lot. Amid everything going wrong in my life, Venus still makes an appearance. So what is he doing there?

Liz Green and Robert Hand, in their writings on these cases, assured me that these transits were excellent, and would help them make progress in treatment. I was now told that this was not the case and that many more terrible transits were coming. Looks like this guy is going to try to get back into my life as expected. What happened? What happened to him?

Through my experience in astrology and reading birth charts, I discovered the following life lessons:

  1. The choices we make matter

Every choice in a particular situation in your life has a transit, and most likely also a progression, reflecting that. But who decides what happens? We do. This is true in the love triangle scenario above. In the scenario where she dumped me, this guy had the option to move on and leave the old relationship. If he had done so, the crossover could have occurred in my happy relationship, but he chose not to.

There was a possibility that I could experience a Saturn-Venus trine, but someone chose to do something else instead. Reflecting on this, the happy relationship lasted only two years. Now, my natal chart indicates that I am doomed to be alone or end up in the same kind of toxic relationship.

It’s as if the planets in the universe are betting on what people will do. There is still time to notice it and do something about it. In the case of my competitor, she had the opportunity to present herself in marriage counseling, or enter individual counseling, and make progress on her childhood issues.

What struck me here is, that if she had done that, Saturn and Venus would have been real to her. And I may not have heard from him again in October 2017. The Saturn trine was a place where a shift for the better could happen if she chose to do the right thing. For me, it seems I have a choice to either slip into depression or refocus and embark on new life adventures like publishing a book.

Related: 5 Ways Letting Go Of Your Toxic Relationship Can Save Your Life

  1. A happy and sad life is possible, but a happy life requires work

In summarizing each important transit for each person during this long period, I noticed that some of them seemed to be very happy transits, and others seemed gloomy and pessimistic. I tried to sort the happy people from the sad people and put them all together for each person year by year in a grid. Every year, everyone is good versus bad.

And what I found is that all the transits, which have been summed up and linked together end-to-end like this for decades, tell two stories for each person: a happy and triumphant one and a very sad and tragic one. The difference between the story we live and the story we don’t depends on whether each person does the emotional and psychological work to recover from their childhood. In a good situation, the person does the work and gets a positive result.

In bad situations, we make the same mistakes over and over again, and the result is tragedy and suffering. For these three people, all wounded by a bad childhood, the issues that make or break success and happiness in life are very clear. It is clear that emotional healing is a critical factor in every life, and it is clear where all the choice points lie.

  1. Actions have consequences

In each case, the natal chart, whether Davison’s (relationship natal chart) or a person’s natal chart, shows the highest potential of that couple or person. I noticed that some reports say that a relationship should end well when in reality the opposite is true and vice versa. I’ve found that when a relationship was expected to end well but it doesn’t, it’s usually because the individuals didn’t put in the work.

In cases where the highest relationship potential emerged, it was because both people were serious about doing their emotional work to make the relationship work. So, while the natal relationship chart shows relationship potential, the transits and progressions predict how each person can go wrong, and what will happen if they do. The natal relationship chart is like a beacon of light that we need to reach without taking actions that might destroy it.

Since so many things have likely gone wrong, people push forward because of pain, suffering, and unhealed wounds. It becomes difficult to find the courage to work on themselves and look at the situation with a new perspective. The truth is, if I hadn’t looked so far forward, I would have misunderstood what this person’s reappearance in October 2017 meant.

I could have made a very wrong decision. If the charts are correct again and this person shows up again – any time between January 1, 2019, and the end of May – I may have misunderstood again and made another huge mistake. As I read further, I see that my transits are warning me not to get involved with this person, and I can save myself from making a mistake that would put me in a toxic relationship again.

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