Narcissism is a personality disorder that involves an inflated sense of self-importance and is manifested by an extreme preoccupation with one’s personal appearance, desires, and needs. Narcissists are selfish, controlling, and manipulative. They also lack empathy for others and routinely ignore the needs of those around them. In this article we will look at a very special family dynamic – that of the narcissistic grandmother and the golden grandchild.

Inevitably, the presence of a narcissist in the extended family creates an environment of stress and instability.

The narcissistic grandparent will manipulate family members and play them against each other, creating instability within the family unit.

Such power battles cause discord and the resulting environment can be stressful and damaging to the mental health of other family members caught in the crossfire.

Narcissistic grandmother

Narcissistic grandmothers can be difficult to interact with and often make family relationships strained.

To better understand the complexities of this situation, let’s take a look at the main characteristics and behaviors of these toxic grandparents.

greatness. A narcissistic grandmother typically has an inflated sense of self-importance, believing that she is superior to everyone else in the family and deserves special treatment.

She often takes credit for the successes of other family members and expects to be seen and treated as the leader of the family.

manipulate. Narcissistic grandmothers tend to manipulate the people around them in order to get what they want and maintain control over people and situations.

They may use guilt trips or passive aggressive behavior to pressure people into giving them what they want.

Selfishness. Narcissistic grandmothers often focus on meeting their own needs at the expense of others—and expect special privileges like taking up the most space in the room or speaking the longest in conversations even when it’s not warranted.

Lack of empathy. A narcissistic grandmother lacks empathy, which makes her seem callous or uncaring about the feelings and experiences of others—especially those who don’t agree with her point of view.

Cash. Narcissistic grandmothers are highly critical of others, always looking for flaws in other people that can be pointed out, mocked or belittled, which increases their superiority complex.

Need for attention. Narcissistic grandmothers tend to demand constant attention from those around them and may become angry if they do not feel they are receiving enough validation from family members or friends.

The narcissistic grandmother and the golden grandson

The golden grandchild is the narcissistic grandmother’s favorite child. She gets all the attention and is the beloved center of her grandmother’s world.

This relationship can be incredibly fraught but full of love, as the golden granddaughter often works hard to maintain her special place in her grandmother’s life.

Here are some ways a narcissistic grandmother treats her golden grandchild.

Possession. A narcissistic grandmother may be overly possessive and controlling of her golden grandchild, expecting them to always act in accordance with her desires.

envy. You are more likely to be jealous of the child’s achievements, rather than feeling proud of them and celebrating with them.

Unrealistic expectations. The Golden Grandson may feel that their successes are not good enough for them, no matter how hard they work or how far they have come.

Manipulation. Narcissistic grandmothers can be manipulative, often using guilt trips or other strategies to get what they want from the golden grandchild.

Very critical. Grandmothers may also criticize a child’s appearance or performance and actively try to undermine his or her self-esteem as a way to maintain control over them.

Plays favorites. You’ll play favorite among siblings or cousins and make sure it’s clear who you like best – the golden grandchild.

The impact on the golden grandson

A narcissistic grandmother can have a long-term detrimental effect on the life of a golden grandchild.

In adulthood, the golden grandson may suffer from low self-esteem and depression as a result of the constant manipulation and guilt he experienced from his grandmother.

They may also have difficulty expressing themselves authentically or living up to the values that are important to them as a result of being subjected to intense supervision during childhood.

This is because instead of helping the child develop their own opinions and beliefs, the narcissistic grandmother imposed her own opinions and expectations on them, leading to feelings of confusion and resentment.

Having such a controlling or overly critical personality in his life can make a child very afraid of making mistakes, leading to a lack of confidence in himself and his abilities.

There is also a risk that they will develop codependent tendencies, leading to problems in their relationships with other family members, friends and romantic partners later in life.

Protecting the golden granddaughter from her narcissistic grandmother

Parents can protect their children from the harmful effects of their narcissistic grandmother by setting boundaries, setting a positive example and intervening if necessary.

Boundaries should include limits on the amount of time the child spends with his or her grandmother, in order to minimize contact as much as possible.

Furthermore, it is important not to leave the child alone with his grandmother during visits, as this may leave him vulnerable to manipulation and emotional abuse.

It is also important that parents do not allow a narcissistic grandmother to dictate how they raise or discipline their children.

Instead, it is important for parents to set consistent rules and expectations so that their child has a safe and healthy environment to grow and develop.

In addition to these preventative measures, parents should be willing and ready to intervene if they notice their child’s narcissistic grandmother belittling them, manipulating their emotions, or engaging in other manipulative behaviors such as unhealthy or unfair comparisons with other children.

Finally, it is important for parents to model healthy communication techniques so that their children have a positive example of how to interact with others.

How can the golden grandson undo the damage caused by the narcissistic grandmother

Unfortunately, for the golden child, the damage done by the narcissistic grandmother can continue into adulthood.

However, by taking proactive steps to heal from trauma, they will be able to break free and live a healthy, well-adjusted life.

Make time to take care of yourself

A narcissistic grandmother can cause a lot of damage, and it is important to take time to recover from the trauma.

This may include activities such as exercising, getting enough sleep, talking to friends and family about your feelings, and doing things that make you feel happy.

Additionally, it’s important to recognize when you’re starting to feel overwhelmed so you can take steps to manage your feelings and practice self-care.

Seek professional help

If the situation is causing long-term emotional or psychological distress, seeking professional help may be helpful.

Talking to a therapist can help you work through any issues you may have, especially because he or she has the proper training and experience in dealing with mental health issues caused by toxic relationships.

Improve your boundaries

To make sure your narcissistic grandmother doesn’t continue to cause damage in your life, set clear boundaries with her if possible.

This may include limiting the amount of time you spend together or keeping interactions as brief as possible.

Contact for support

Toxic family relationships are difficult to deal with alone. This is why it’s important to build supportive networks outside of your family dynamic wherever possible.

This may include leaning on close friends or having meaningful conversations with a mentor or therapist, so you don’t feel isolated during difficult times.

Asking for help can make a big difference in protecting yourself from further manipulation by providing additional social support outlets as well as emotional guidance when needed.