When someone is in a toxic or abusive relationship, the first question on everyone’s mind is why they don’t leave.
After all, who in their right mind would consciously choose to stay in an unhealthy relationship that continues to break their heart and ruin their life?
Well, the truth is that things are not as simple as they first seem because toxic people have a way of dragging their victims into an endless cycle of emotional violence and toxicity.
They use different manipulation strategies to keep you always wanting more, here are the most common ones.
- It’s inconsistent
The main reason you keep coming back to a toxic man is because of his inconsistency. You see, this type of person rarely shows their true colors from the beginning.
Instead, they usually pretend to be something they are not until you fall in love with them. The same goes for this guy.
There are days when he is the best man in the world.
The days when he keeps reminding you what butterflies feel like and the days when you feel like the happiest woman in the world just by having him by your side.
However, there are also moments where he turns into a monster and moments where you don’t recognize him.
Unfortunately, situations where its toxicity comes to the surface are occurring more and more often.
So, he always leaves you coming back for more simply because you’re hoping to get the guy back from the beginning of the story.
You keep lying to yourself that his evil side is just a phase and you keep expecting the nice guy to show up again.
- He convinces you that you are not enough
Another strategy toxic men use to keep their victims wanting more is telling them they are not enough.
This man has succeeded in convincing you that you are worthless and that nothing you do is right.
So, unconsciously, you keep coming back to him and trying to prove him wrong.
You want him to see your true value and stop considering you immature and a good-for-nothing.
Without realizing it, you are actually in a constant search for his approval, which you will never receive.
You want him to realize that you are enough because you believe that this is the only way you will regain a sense of self-worth.
- It makes you think you are unlovable
So, after a while, you feel grateful that he agreed to be with you.
You think you’re lucky to have him, despite all the terrible treatment he gets.
You also don’t even think about replacing him with someone else because you think that no other man can ever love you.
Even when you’re trying to find someone else, you doubt their intentions and constantly hear this man’s warning voice in the back of your head, telling you that you’ll end up ridiculed and sad.
And this is exactly what he wants: to keep you by his side and for you to always come back to him.
- It isolates you from the rest of the world
All toxic men have one thing in common: They go to great lengths to isolate their victims from their loved ones.
Suddenly, your friends aren’t so good to you, and even your family members don’t mean well to you.
At first, you think that this man is trying to protect you from the bad guys in your life, without realizing that he is the bad guy in the picture.
You do not notice that he is actually doing all this to keep you away from everyone who could open your eyes and reveal the truth to you about him.
Besides, by making you cut ties with everyone around you, he makes it even more difficult to leave him.
This way, even when you think about walking away, you remember that you have nowhere to go.
You’ve lost all the people you can count on, the people who can help you get back on your feet, the people who can support you when you turn over a new leaf. So you stay there where you are, without a chance to make a difference.
- He made you dependent on him
One of the most important things for toxic people is to make their victims dependent on them.
It doesn’t matter whether you suffer from financial or emotional dependency, the point is the same; It’s a man’s toxic way of trapping you.
He is the one who knows what is best for you. He is the one whose advice you should listen to, and even when he insults you, he does it for your benefit.
After he devalues you, you think he is much better than you.
You believe him when he tells you that you can’t achieve anything without him, that you can’t live life without his hand guiding you.
So, even when you try to walk away from that relationship, you keep coming back to it because you’re afraid you won’t be able to make it on your own.
