While some of us lie to avoid hurting someone else’s feelings, or to avoid conflict, there are people who just can’t seem to come to terms with the truth. Pathological liars have no moral compass.
They use lies as a tool for manipulation, control, and power, simply because they can. You should feel empowered knowing that you can convince someone of something they know is not the truth. But they are so good at lying that they won’t stop doing it.
They may have started using it as a necessary evil, but over time it has become a habit.
Now, they don’t know how to tell the truth even if they wanted to.
Dating a liar can hurt you in many ways, from twisting your mind and questioning your sanity, to feeling betrayed and broken simply for loving someone who has never been honest with you.
There are many signs that you are dating a compulsive liar to save yourself from the ways they can break you down.
- He hides things from you
He doesn’t want to get caught, so he’ll do whatever he can to keep the lie going.
He will hide his phone, keep passcodes and passwords on everything and keep you out of his private life as much as possible.
Even when you feel like something is wrong, he is so good at manipulating you that you will eventually apologize to him, even though he is the one who should be apologizing to you.
- He lies about ordinary matters
They lie about basically everything. From what they had for breakfast, to what they did in the morning, to what time they went to bed.
With them, you’ll never know what the truth is, and even when they know you can see through their lies, they’re still lying. It’s not something they can’t control, it’s something they don’t want to control.
While loyalty is one of the most important qualities in a relationship, it is practically impossible to have it with them.
- He always has an excuse
No matter what happens, he is able to make up the entire story in a matter of seconds.
While the rest of us stumble and stutter, trying to find the words to get ourselves out of it, he doesn’t even miss a beat.
He’ll have an excuse the moment you confront him about anything, leaving you confused and wondering where things went wrong.
- There is nothing he is prohibited from lying about
While some of us lie just in order to avoid hurting someone’s feelings or save their ass (like avoiding answering, “Did you eat my ice cream?”), compulsive lying is nothing sacred — not even lying about whether or not he loves you. If he betrays you or takes something from you.
He has no compunction about manipulating you and will do whatever it takes to keep the charade going.
- You begin to question your sanity
He has a way of convincing you that the sky is yellow and the sun is blue.
You soon begin to question your sanity, because he manages to convince you that the things you went through with him didn’t even happen the way they did. it is good.
And every time you feel upset about his lying, he makes you feel guilty for thinking he’s the victim, so you end up being the one who apologizes.
The thing with compulsive liars is that they have a way of making us question our minds and reason.
- You feel like the bad guy being questioned
Manipulation is his game and he has mastered it to perfection.
No wonder you feel like the worst villain to ever live, just because you dared to question his stories or loyalty.
He will turn your world upside down without even thinking about it, as long as he gets what he wants.
- He never takes responsibility, he blames you
When you catch him in the act and confront him about it, he will either turn the story upside down and try to convince you to see his version of the truth or he will find a way to shift the blame onto you.
He lied just to protect you, was afraid you wouldn’t be able to handle the truth, was sure you weren’t interested in knowing the truth, etc.
He will never, and I mean never, take responsibility for his lies and tricks.
- He has no regrets
With no moral compass or remorse, he is a psychopathic liar who will never feel guilty for making you feel like the crazy one.
Not once will he show the slightest bit of remorse for breaking you into a million pieces, because he’s unable to have any of them.
This will make you feel like you don’t deserve someone’s love, loyalty, and honesty, when the only truth is that they were never able to give you any. All he was able to offer you was lies and manipulation.
- It takes away your security
His games rob you of everything you thought you knew. His games rob you of security, strength, and the ability to trust anyone or yourself.
Relationships are about feeling safe, respected, and loved, and when you’re dating a pathological liar, you don’t have any of those things.
It takes your faith in love and it seems like there’s no way you can get back on your feet after you’ve been broken so badly that it destroyed everything you were.
And just when you think you’ve managed to change it, it breaks you again.
Loving a liar is worse than walking through hell, so it’s best to stay away from him while you still can.