Some relationships aren’t meant for you, but being in a relationship with a narcissist tops the list. Here are the warning signs that you are dating a narcissist and you should run!
“The prerequisite for the realization of love is the overcoming of narcissism. The narcissistic orientation is one in which one experiences as real only what is within oneself, while the phenomena in the external world have no reality in themselves, but are experienced only from the point of view of being useful Or dangerous to oneself. The opposite pole of narcissism is objectivity. It is the ability to see people and things as they are, objectively, and the ability to separate this objective picture from the one formed by one’s own desires and fears.”
- Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
The other day, a friend of mine was telling me about her recent breakup. She had been seeing this guy for a long time and something in him just didn’t click.
“He always speaks for himself,” she complained. “He was just getting on my nerves. He wasn’t even bothering to listen to me, my life.
To be in a healthy relationship, one must know their partner well, with all their good and bad. But this is not the problem of people like my ex-boyfriend. People like them, called narcissists, will keep talking about themselves no matter the situation.
So, in a relationship, only one person gets a chance to talk while the other just listens. This is not healthy at all. To make a relationship work, both people need to have their say, they both need to be a part of each other’s lives. If only one person continues to indulge in narcissism, the other person will remain lonely, with no one to listen to.
How do we know if the person we are dating is a narcissist or not?
7 Warning signs you are dating a narcissistic man
- Quick suggestion
The person will quickly propose to you after a few weeks or months of interaction.
You will be admired and praised as if you were the person he had been waiting for his whole life. Yes, this may sound like a fairy tale. But I will give you reality! This is nonsense. We all know that no one can be that saintly to wait for that particular person and it is wise to get to know the person in such a short period.
Remember, he only wants to trick you into his world.
Read When Someone You Love Becomes Toxic
2. Sope has a story ready
The person will have a tragic story or multiple such stories.
You will be told about those cruel people who came into his life, played with his heart, and then left him broken. We’ve all been through breakups. This is not to say that he only had the worst of them all.
This is just a way to get sympathy and get your attention so that you can fall into the trap and listen to him for the rest of his life.
- He tells you that you are better than his ex-girlfriend
Better than his ex-wife
Am I dating a narcissist: Being in a relationship with a narcissist
It can feel amazing when your partner tells you how much better you are than your ex.
Now, don’t forget that there was a period when he also loved his ex-wife and considered her the best girl in this world. We all have certain positive and negative sides.
Talking only about the negative aspects of an ex won’t make you any better than them. This may happen to you too
- He and his accomplishments
How often do you have to listen to his accomplishments and keep clapping and praising him? Every moment? Then this is a red alert for you.
A person who keeps talking about his accomplishments always and indirectly asking for evaluation is a very self-absorbed person.
He will not be interested in you and will want you to keep complimenting him to satisfy his ego.
Related: What Drives Emotional Abuse in Relationships
- Everything leads back to Him
He only knows how to talk about “me, me, and myself.” Whatever you discuss, it will come down to him in the end.
Everything in this world would be relevant to his life and he would talk about it afterward. Not only is this boring, but it also shows how self-centered he is.
A selfish person cannot love anyone but himself. So be careful.
- How he is affected by every little thing in this world
Is the store closed? get annoyed Is it raining hard and he can’t go out? get annoyed It seems like every little thing that happens triggers his feelings and he’ll get upset about it.
This not only brings negativity into your relationship but also shows how unaware he is of not understanding the situation.
- You have to be there whenever he wants you to the store closed? get annoyed Is it raining hard and he can’t go out? get annoyed It seems like every little thing that happens triggers his feelings and he’ll get upset about it.
This not only brings negativity into your relationship but also shows how unaware he is of not understanding the situation.
- You have to be there whenever he wants you
Have you seen him get upset if you fail to meet him when he needs you? Should you meet him often? Well, reality check again!
He even wants you to talk about himself. He doesn’t want you because of the companionship but for his narcissism.
Therefore, if you find these traits in your partner, it is time for you to realize that they are not worthy enough to move the relationship forward. Good luck and God bless you. There are very nice people in this world who are better than narcissists.
