People with narcissistic personality disorder may seem like they are very confident, but in reality, they are often insecure and extremely needy. When it comes to relationships with these types of people, it can be difficult to set boundaries and create a healthy relationship dynamic. Here are some strategies to break free from a narcissistic relationship pattern.
What is the narcissistic relationship style?
A narcissistic relationship style is a type of dynamic, dysfunctional relationship between two people, with one individual usually displaying multiple narcissistic traits.
This pattern of behavior involves manipulation, emotional abuse, control, and dominance on the part of the narcissist, while the other person often plays the role of accommodating or enabling this behavior in order to maintain a certain level of peace or stability.
Common patterns that people experience in narcissistic relationships include gaslighting, invalidation and criticism, unrealistic demands from the narcissist, and a general power imbalance between the two parties.
Freedom from the narcissistic relationship pattern
Breaking free from a narcissistic relationship pattern can be a very difficult process.
It takes courage and strength to recognize the signs of narcissistic behavior and begin the healing and recovery process, but it is possible with the right tools and resources.
1- Know your value
It can be easy to fall into the cycle of trying to please someone who is always looking for happiness, even if that person doesn’t offer anything in return.
This may mean giving them attention, validation, or material possessions without receiving any reciprocity.
To break this pattern and create a healthier relationship, it is important to first realize that you are dealing with a narcissist and acknowledge the negative impact the relationship is having on your mental health.
It’s important to realize your worth and know that you don’t have to put up with someone else’s behavior or emotional abuse.
It can be very difficult to break up from a relationship like this, especially if the person has become an integral part of your life.
However, the truth is that no one has the right to make you feel worthless, and it’s okay to set boundaries.
Confronting a narcissist takes courage, but once you make the decision, start taking small steps toward breaking free from the cycle of manipulation.
2- Setting boundaries
The most important step when breaking out of a narcissistic relationship pattern is to define your boundaries.
Narcissists tend to assume that their needs should come first, so make sure you are clear about your needs and how they should be respected in the relationship.
This could mean anything from setting an expectation for frequency of contact to letting them know when something is inappropriate or unacceptable in terms of behavior.
Setting your boundaries also means being honest with yourself about what you can and cannot tolerate in a relationship. Communicate your boundaries effectively
Once you have determined your boundaries, it is important to communicate them effectively to the narcissist to avoid any misunderstandings or misconceptions.
Effective communication also involves being assertive but not aggressive when expressing your needs or concerns.
It is important to remember that although it may seem that the narcissist does not care about your opinion, this is not necessarily true.
Communication can help bridge any gaps between you and foster understanding.
Here are some examples of the types of boundaries you can set and how to implement them:
“It’s not good for you to manipulate me or disrespect me, and if that happens I will leave.”
“I expect you to treat me with respect, and if you don’t I will end our conversation immediately.”
“You may be having a hard time at work, but my feelings and needs are important too, so if they are not respected, I will have to leave.”
“I will not tolerate any more manipulative behavior from you, and if it continues I will end this phone call.”
Recognize the projection and don’t get sucked into their drama
Narcissists often project their insecurities onto those around them by engaging in destructive critical or humiliating behaviors.
It is important to remember that these attacks are not personal, and that the narcissist is likely coming from a place of feeling insecure or hurt.
The best approach when confronted with this behavior is to remain calm and detached while also reinforcing your boundaries.
It may be helpful to remind yourself that this behavior has more to do with the narcissist’s insecurities than you as an individual.
3- Get professional help
Professional help from a therapist or counselor can be invaluable when breaking out of a narcissistic relationship pattern.
A therapist or counselor can provide invaluable support, advice, and resources to anyone who has been in a toxic relationship with a narcissist.
Receiving professional guidance can help those affected by narcissistic behavior gain clarity and insight into the situation, while also learning how to address the underlying issues that caused the patterns of abuse in the first place.
Talking to a therapist provides victims with a safe environment to talk openly and honestly about their experiences without fear of judgment or criticism.
This enables them to regain control of their lives, while also learning basic strategies and techniques they can use to better deal with future interactions with narcissistic people in their private lives and professionally.
Therefore, therapy is one of the most effective ways to break free from the cycle of abuse that often characterizes relationships with narcissists.
It allows those affected by narcissistic behavior to gain insight into how their behaviors enable this cycle of abuse, as well as access specific tools and techniques to navigate these types of dynamics safely and confidently moving forward.
4-Make time for yourself
When trying to break out of a narcissistic relationship pattern, it is important to take time for yourself away from them.
This includes engaging in activities that enrich your life such as hobbies, spending time with friends, pursuing passions outside of work or school, etc.
Taking time for yourself will help build your self-confidence and self-esteem, and also provide you with an opportunity to reflect and grow without having to worry about the impact of the narcissist’s presence or your opinions.
5- Building a supportive network
When it comes to finding emotionally supportive people during your healing journey, friends and family can be invaluable sources of guidance and support.
Spending time with those who understand what you are going through and can provide you with a shoulder to lean on or an ear to listen can be incredibly beneficial when trying to break free from a narcissistic relationship pattern.
It may also be helpful to look for groups or organizations specifically designed for those with issues related to narcissistic personality disorder.
Conclusion – How to break free from the narcissistic relationship pattern
Ultimately, dealing with someone with narcissistic tendencies can be very difficult, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible.
By understanding your worth, setting boundaries, not taking things personally, and seeking professional help if necessary, it is possible for someone stuck in a narcissistic relationship to break free of this toxic pattern and begin building healthier relationships instead.
