The way they deliberately go out of their way to make you feel that way, right?
Raise your hand if you’ve been there.
I see you all.
Narcissists are constantly looking for ways to make you look ridiculous, even if it’s for their own personal enjoyment.
But let’s start looking right here, because I can tell you right now—I bet you can all relate to at least one of these 13 things.
Trust Me…They Try All The Time
I’d like to say I don’t know what makes narcissists such toxic, unhappy members of society, but I’d be lying.
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I do.
They hate themselves.
They can’t stand your happiness, your success, your accomplishments, your kindness, your compassion, your love, your mercy—I could go on.
Well, yes. Any chance they get to bring you down in your prime, they’ll do it.
Having a good day? A narcissist will take it away from you!
Did you get a promotion at work? The narcissist will steal your happiness!
Are you offering the world some happiness? The narcissist will make you look stupid!
It’s best to keep your eyes open for these situations, because they’ll happen to you if you’re around them.
1 Hiding Things
Where exactly did you put it? You can’t remember it.
You swear it was on the side of the road.
No. You left it in the car.
No! It was actually in your dresser drawer.
Well, it doesn’t matter now, because the narcissist moved it and hid it well from your view.
Not only that, but they’ve even gone so far as to accuse you of being forgetful, careless, stupid, or even anxious—as if you have a real memory problem.
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It’s a clear sign they’re trying to make you feel crazy and stupid, and it happens a lot.
For example, a client I know once told me that her ex-husband would ask her to iron his shirt for work, but the iron would never work. She plugged it in—and nothing.
One time, she disappeared trying to find a solution, and when she returned, she caught him reconnecting the power, turning it on, and yelling, “I’ll fix it myself!”
Not great, is it? But at least he got caught in the act.
2 Manipulate Your Emotions
The first point was a form of emotional manipulation, but this one leads into more direct ways a narcissist can manipulate your emotions to make you look and feel stupid.
Really? Are you that stupid? Don’t you remember?
I told you so clearly, how could you remember it any differently?
It’s simple.
The narcissist will rob you of your reality—the true reality.
When they replace it with their own, you’ll feel stupid most of the time as they manipulate what’s really going on.
3 Tell Personal Stories in Front of Others
I hate all of these points, but this one is the most dangerous.
In front of anyone, a narcissist will make you feel or look stupid by telling stories about you.
You turned the kitchen faucet the wrong way.
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You filled the car with the wrong gas.
You fell behind in a school math competition.
You’ve never known the capital of Brazil.
Whatever they can offer to judge you on, they will.
4 Mention Your Weaknesses in Public
Oh, it’s true they don’t like their hair. What do you think?
Do you notice how upset they get whenever I mention their teeth?
They always tell me how exhausted they are at work. I think it’s their way of not feeling up to the task.
It’s like you want the ground to swallow you up and make you disappear forever.
Your weaknesses are personal, and you probably shared them with the narcissist in private, thinking you could trust them to at least keep them to themselves.
Why would someone who says they love you do this to you and make you look so stupid?
The first thing they know others will do is look at you. Check your hair, or take a quick look at your teeth.
Their job is done. People make you feel uncomfortable, and they just sit back and pretend to laugh.
5 Remind Yourself You’re “Unqualified”
Nothing is more dis empowering than being reminded that you’re unqualified for a certain opinion or idea.
Of course you’re not, and speaking up is threatening enough to them that they want to put you back in your place.
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I say: Refuse to be put in that position, and keep talking!
6 Never Stand Up for Yourself
Narcissists expect you to support them in everything, but they’ll never reciprocate by standing up for you and showing you how important you are.
It won’t be painless, so either get used to feeling stupid, or leave.
7 Absence
You wait and wait, but they don’t come. They didn’t care enough to remember, or they didn’t care enough to make the effort.
I think both are just as bad as each other, but I want you to know that’s not how you define your worth.
8 Subtle Sarcasm
Subtle sarcasm might be the worst, because it’s so subtle, isn’t it?
You think everyone is listening and understanding what’s going on, but the sarcasm is subtle enough that only you can understand.
If you feel stupid, the narcissist secretly knows how they did it.
9 They Criticize You Publicly
As if you need an audience to watch you blush with embarrassment. For the narcissist, with a little luck, you might become the person people never forget in that moment.
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You’ll always be remembered, and not for the better!
10 Speak Up
Oh my God, is there anything more infuriating?
You’re trying to get your point across, but the narcissist completely ignores you.
The assurance of their authority over you is frustrating and can make people feel insignificant.
This shows how little they care about you. You might want to remember this the next time they tell you they “love” you.
11 Speak Up
Like you don’t have a voice!
You do!
The less you use it, the more the narcissist will love your presence.
You need to break this cycle and stop appearing weak in front of everyone. Your voice is your gift, and using it means keeping your opinions and ideas…
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…before the narcissist steals them forever!
12 Hate Your Suggestions
Rejecting you is exactly what they love to do.
If you have a great idea, they’ll reject you, steal it, and even steal it for themselves.
How bold!
13 Make fun of what you love to do
Your hobbies and enjoyments are your own business. Not that the narcissist thinks so.
Have you ever felt like the narcissist in your life wants to make you feel stupid just because you like what you like?
Well, they’re hoping you’ll stop.
Stop everything.
