Why the Narcissist Does Not Change

Have you ever wondered why a narcissist hates and is unable to change? Most people continue to develop and mature emotionally as they go through life. For a narcissist, this is not the case. In general, the narcissist does not change. Many of us may also be wondering do narcissists get worse with age? Any transformation is a challenge for pathologically narcissistic people. There are several reasons why narcissists can change?’ It’s a common question and a hotly debated topic.

Rigid character structure

Firstly, in response to narcissism can change, individuals with this personality disorder can not understand the problem. Pathological narcissism is a defense mechanism that developed as a way of adaptation in very early childhood. Suppose a parent, who most likely offered conditional love or was a narcissist, unfairly blamed a narcissist as a child. In this case, the narcissist will be very sensitive to blame him in adulthood. This situation is the case even when you justify the blame. The cold truth is that a narcissist cannot take responsibility for anything and hates nothing more than being asked to be responsible.

The inherent pattern of behavior is the denial, disbursement, and rejection of anything they perceive as cash. The narcissist lives in a constant mode of survival, although the emotional abuse incurred by childhood has long passed. Will a narcissist ever change? The abuse created the narcissistic wound at an age when the narcissist was unable to emotionally process the hurt. The narcissist, therefore, became emotionally stunted and never continued to develop emotional intelligence at an adult level. As a result, they focus entirely on their needs, in the same way that we see young children behaving. Empathy comes at a very high cost in the narcissist’s battle to exist and feel as if it matters.

Can a narcissist be changed? In the narcissist’s mind, they do not want to see the reality of the situation. Doing this will be very painful, and they are devoid of the ability for self-reflection and healing. Their dysfunction has developed, so they don’t have to see or face the truth. If they manage to perceive the truth, they will be able to at least make small changes to their behavior, giving people who are wondering if the narcissist will change some hope.

Related : Why the Narcissist Blames You

However, as far as narcissists are concerned, they are abused, misunderstood, and suffer a lot. They are the victims in this case, and as victims, how can they be bad? Rather, you are a terrible bully and abuser. The narcissist is unable to understand that their negative feelings stem from a personality disorder and not, in fact, others. This misunderstanding is a winding psychological blind spot for a narcissist and endlessly frustrates everyone in their life.

Have you spent countless hours explaining to a narcissist that the way they perceive events is dysfunctional? You may have reached a point where you thought the narcissist had finally realized reality and was on the verge of a breakthrough, only for the individual with this disease to turn around and throw everything in your face. This pattern of behavior is beyond irritating and will destroy you both mentally and physically unless you accept your helplessness to help.

In narcissistic relationships, the child-parent dynamic is reenacted, and the narcissist is a blameless and helpless child. Anyone involved with narcissism finds themselves in the role of parents, a position they initially didn’t realize they were going to play. Can narcissists change and not rely on this toxic dynamic? It is unlikely because they do not know an alternative way of working. You realize that even the most grandiose of overt narcissists play the role of a child as soon as they see behind the mask.

Narcissists believe that they deserve special treatment and that others must make great sacrifices on their behalf. It does not occur to them that they do not give others this kind of love and affection. As far as narcissists are concerned, their beliefs and behaviors are completely justified, because they suffer more intensely than anyone else.

Pathologically narcissistic people are also incredibly worried about changing their behavior. Narcissists and control are hot topics. They perceive this as a threat to their identity, which means that the answer can change narcissists. More or less impossible. A narcissist cannot fix his broken and dysfunctional personality structure, in the same way a cat cannot magically turn into a dog. Also, as their sense of self is incredibly fragile and fragile, the narcissist views trying to make any changes as scary and possibly harmful.

On the third reason, narcissists have little or no desire to fix their problematic ways. In their minds, you are the problem. All narcissists are dependent on projecting their unwanted painful feelings onto others – they do not have the strength to bear the burden. The narcissist does not change, because they think that the way they work works for them and they cannot see this; in fact, it does not happen. The narcissist’s personality structure is completely rigid, with the false self-placed above the layers, stifling any possible development of the stalled authentic self.

Can a narcissist be changed with tough love?

Perhaps finding answers to whether a narcissist will change is difficult to understand or accept. If so, you might be wondering, Can a narcissist be changed with tough love? In these circumstances, tough love refers to openly clarifying the truth to the narcissist in an unemotional way. You might think that it is because of the lack of emotional empathy in people with this disease; perhaps this direct tactic is effective. Unfortunately, you will probably be disappointed all over again.

Narcissists usually perceive anything that resembles tough love as abuse. They cannot understand what you are trying to say and do not want to understand, they are very upset by the way you address them. You can try to explain all you want that you are trying to help them in the long run, but narcissists do not look to the future; they live only here and now.

Like a small child on the receiving end of discipline, the narcissist despises your attempt to employ authority and may even frame you as his attacker. Your expectations of a narcissist will only make them retaliate even more, dish out insults, and push you away. Someone has to be motivated to want to change, and narcissists don’t have the life force within their psyche to face the challenge. Trying to change a narcissist with tough love is an exercise in futility.

Tough love works only on the assumption that someone is capable of self-reflection. Narcissists spend their lives avoiding looking inside and addressing their many issues, deep down, they know they are powerless to change the business. Parenting and conditioning shattered the plot of narcissists’ emerging personalities during early childhood, and they now have no real way to put the jigsaw back together.

Do narcissists get worse with age?

Most of us who have been on tour or in a relationship with a narcissist may be curious- do narcissists get worse with age? Unfortunately, evidence suggests that most people with narcissistic personality disorder suffer more from their illnesses as they age.

Related : Is the Narcissist Happy?

Firstly, the narcissist is likely to have less supply. Our social circles tend to shrink as we get older, and relying on benefits such as good looks and charm becomes less viable. No one finds aging easy, but for narcissists, the effects on their mental health can be catastrophic. The realization that she is not a characteristic example or a shining example of an ideal citizen, causes narcissistic injury and depression.

Secondly, narcissists get worse with age because they have not treated and healed their internal wounds. Like everything in life, neglected and unexamined, wounds have a habit of rotting.

Why a narcissist doesn’t change the bottom line

With disrespect or understanding of others as human beings, narcissists do not change; they have no reason for it. To continue to work the way they do is much simpler and more manageable. In the mind of an emotionally arrested narcissist, change is unnecessary and does not provide any benefit to them. After all, their survival is all that matters. So, please don’t make the same mistake that many of us have made along this difficult path and spent eternity wondering, Will a narcissist ever change? Your time and mind are very precious.

Even if the narcissist desperately wants to change and be able to feel more positive emotions, such as love and emotional empathy, people suffering from this disease cannot change the basics of their personality structure. Once in adulthood, a narcissist is who they are and cannot switch to another type of existence. Contrary to popular belief, many narcissists express a desire to exist without their disorder, sometimes only out of sheer curiosity. Unfortunately for everyone involved, the magic wand to fix debilitating personality disorders remains elusive.