the main points
It is a common misconception that narcissists only look for emotionally dependent partners.
What appears to be an overabundance of self-confidence in the narcissist is a protective wall of insecurity and lack of self-confidence.
Narcissists often feel secure with powerful partners because they have always struggled with a consistent parental figure.

One of the most common misconceptions is that narcissists only look for partners who are emotionally dependent and lack confidence and self-esteem. In fact, narcissists are often attracted to strong, confident women.

While this may seem counterintuitive, it is important to realize that the narcissistic traits of grandiosity and confidence are actually a mask for deep insecurity. What appears to be an overabundance of self-confidence is actually a protective wall designed to prevent the narcissist from admitting his insecurity and lack of self-confidence.

At the same time, the narcissist uses this feeling of self-confidence and reassurance to portray an attractive persona of a confident, successful woman. She is looking for a man who does not need her constant support and who has the strength

Narcissists often feel secure with powerful partners because they have always struggled with a consistent parental figure. When you take charge, manage life effectively, and create your own success, this becomes a magnet for narcissists. Coupling this with your ability to show empathy and kindness creates a natural magnet for narcissists who desperately want to have these characteristics.

In addition, the narcissist sees a strong woman as a conquest. It provides him with a sense that he is equal or worthy of a relationship with someone successful, independent, and strong.

Signs your new partner may be a narcissist

As a confident and strong woman, knowing what red flags to look for to identify a narcissist is essential. Remember, anyone can display some of these behaviors occasionally, but if they are frequent, there is likely a problem:

Mr. Perfect – Although the new partner may be Mr. True, there could be a problem if he seems too perfect. The narcissist will remember what you say you like, enjoy, or have a passion for, and suddenly incorporate everything you like into his preferences, choices, and decisions.

Crossing boundaries – A narcissist has difficulties with boundaries and may use jokes, comments, or actions to try to cross your boundaries. If you notice this and bring it up, they will try to deflect the problem, make a joke, or even blame you or someone else.

Playing on your empathy – Through manipulation, the narcissist plays on your empathy or kindness to get his own way. This usually involves blaming and attempts to shame you into doing what they want.

Wanting to be alone all the time – Although it may sound romantic, a narcissist creates a feeling of isolation and dependency when they insist on being alone. Be careful if your new partner never wants to go out, spend time with friends, or introduce you to his friends and family. In some cases, a narcissist may be willing to go out with you but never wants you to spend time alone with your friends and family or out of his sight.
If you believe your partner is a narcissist or has narcissistic traits, considering whether the relationship should move forward is a crucial step. The longer a strong, confident woman stays in a narcissistic relationship, the more challenging it becomes to stay away from her.

Working with a therapist to clarify your relationship needs, boundaries, and expectations is an effective way to evaluate possibilities. This is also helpful in completely breaking up with the narcissist early in the relationship if it is not sustainable. While a narcissist can seek counseling and make changes to become a healthier partner, this is not a common response for those with this personality disorder.