Workplace bullying is an unfortunate situation, but it does happen. However, it is possible that your simple case of “workplace bullying” is actually narcissism.
No one likes the idea of workplace harassment; In an ideal world, everyone would get along and there would be no need to resolve conflicts in the workplace.
However, learning effective workplace communication with fellow employees and the difference between simple bad behavior and actual signs of narcissism from a workplace “bully” will help you determine if the situation calls for something more drastic than “talking down” to employees. The potential narcissist in question.
It is widely accepted that knowledge is power. Therefore, it is best to start by raising your awareness of the nature of the “bully” and the role narcissism plays in the workplace.
What is narcissism, and how can you differentiate it from bad behavior when it comes to workplace bullying?
According to the American Psychiatric Association, it is a personality disorder characterized by the following narcissistic traits:
- An exaggerated sense of self-importance
Believing they are special and expecting people to defer to them
Recognition is expected without accomplishments to justify it
The belief that they are superior and can only be understood as equally superior individuals
The need for constant admiration
Possesses a sense of entitlement and expects special considerations and accommodations
Lacks the ability or desire to recognize the needs or feelings of others
He displays an arrogant and superior manner
They often act with the behavior of someone with high self-confidence when in reality they are in a constant battle with their fragile self-esteem.
Their actual confidence is superficial and cannot withstand scrutiny, let alone criticism. Their reaction to criticism goes beyond the traditional human reaction of defense and anger.
It arouses the desire for revenge within them. They embody the proverb: you are with me or against me.
It is important to understand the narcissist’s secret weapons. They can have above average IQs and are usually very skilled at what they do.
They rely on making themselves indispensable, so that you hesitate to address their disruptive behavior once and for all because you need their knowledge and skills to help the department run smoothly.
They view information as power. Therefore, they are usually well informed and willing to volunteer to be on committees that they consider powerful or at the heart of things.
Perhaps the most disturbing tool in a narcissist’s arsenal is that they possess the following characteristics of a predator:
Attractive
Charming (when they feel it is a useful tool.)
Seduction (They have the ability to tell you what you want to hear and make you believe they are truly sincere in wanting to “get it done right” if you give them another chance.)
In comparison, the characteristics of a chronically uncivil person can be annoying, immature, and destructive, but they do not leave the target of their behavior threatened, humiliated, or feeling weak and insecure.
Related: Why Empaths & Narcissists Are Attracted To Each Other (And The Toxic Relationship Between Them)
Examples of chronic uncivil behavior include, but are not limited to:
Frequently late for work, reporting, and assisting others
Weak boundaries with personal life and challenges
Chronic complaint regardless of the issue
Inappropriate body language in gatherings and meetings
Chronic cancellation of meetings
- Interrupting or talking to someone repeatedly
However, if the bully is indeed a narcissist, he or she will rarely follow the accepted chain of command when he has an idea to share or a complaint to register.
They do not view people immediately above them as special or worthy enough to appreciate their contributions. Usually, they prefer to go straight to the top no matter how it is structured.
Unfortunately, they will only take you seriously when you use a disciplinary process. An uncivilized employee may sometimes jump the chain of command, but will stop if the appropriate structure is reworked.
It is unusual for an individual who engages in narcissistic-disruptive behavior to self-correct without leadership intervention. Training and training aimed at influencing and modifying behavior requires time and patience.
