As a wife, you may find that one of the most annoying things is a stubborn husband who always believes that he is right and cannot do anything wrong.
Everyone makes mistakes sometimes or doesn’t do the right thing and it’s normal to notice it after the fact. However, if it continues to become a pattern, it is a problem.
Specific signs of a husband who believes he can do no wrong include:
- Your husband blames you for everything that goes wrong.
- He has to win every argument.
- He always projects his feelings onto you.
- He suffers from mood swings and gets upset, and he sees that you are getting emotional after he hurt you.
- You always feel like you do everything for free.
According to marriage and family therapist Frances Patton, a spouse who believes he has done nothing wrong not only neglects to apologize, “He flatly refuses to apologize. He believes he has not done anything he needs to apologize for.”
Maybe think about why he does this and how you can help him change his ways.
Fortunately, some people can change, so don’t worry, try not to lose hope, first understand why he is like this, and then ask how you can help.
Related: 11 Honest Signs Your Parents Might Not Love You The Right Way
Reasons why your husband thinks he is doing nothing wrong
There can be several reasons why your husband feels this way. If you’re wondering why your husband turns everything against you, it’s likely because he was raised to think this way. After all, he probably experienced a lot of rejection in childhood which led to low self-esteem.
It can also result from one of these five reasons.
- He is a perfectionist.
The husband’s belief that he does nothing wrong may be a result of his mentality that makes him perfect all the time. He believes he can do no wrong because he is perfect. He cannot admit that he is wrong or that he has failed at something because that would mean that he did not succeed and therefore is not a perfect person.
This is a terrible mindset because we all know that no one is perfect. We all make mistakes, and it’s healthy to admit when you’re wrong, even if your perfectionist self doesn’t think you are.
According to clinical hypnotherapist and relationship expert Kia Murthy, he was raised as “Mr. Excellent!”
“Maybe he saw men around his mother doing that to her and she never stood up for herself,” Murthy says. “He may say he loves you but he doesn’t like your ways or he doesn’t like you when you don’t suit him. Maybe he doesn’t even love you but keeps you close to him for reasons best known to him. He doesn’t love you because you are you.”
- He has narcissistic tendencies.
Your husband may be a narcissist, which is why he thinks this way. The narcissist always turns the conversation around and makes himself the victim and the accuser responsible, which is one of the signs of a bad husband.
“When a husband doesn’t meet you halfway, he’s not a good husband,” says Murthy.
A bad spouse will also be abusive, have narcissistic tendencies, and may be diagnosed as a full-blown narcissist.
If so, your husband will misinterpret everything you say and emotionally manipulate you, and you should reach out to a mental health professional or couples therapist to fix your marriage.
- He rejects your accusations.
Your husband may have developed this while growing up. When he is called out for a mistake or accused of doing something wrong, he immediately shuts it down and rejects it. This is because he used rejection as a defense mechanism and has to always be right.
According to Murthy, he can show you certain signs of this when you start talking. “He’s not looking at you, and if he does it’s a blank look or a look that’s nothing but interest in your words.”
He also doesn’t respond when you call him, and if he does, “he’s in a hurry or frustrated. He shows no respect for your things, your time, your words, or any opinion.”
“If you bring up your opinion or anything remotely related, the response is a shrug, a blank stare, a ‘So?’ or walking away,” says Murthy. “If he’s a speaker, he’ll bring up things from the past where he feels you were wrong.”
- He has low self-esteem.
If your husband has low self-esteem, it is most likely due to childhood problems, especially unresolved issues such as not feeling loved, praised, or accepted by parents and family. It’s also possible that he has a parent who is just like him and believes he is always right, which is why your husband thinks this is the way he should act.
When you try to explain your point of view, he doesn’t listen because he has to be right.
“He interrupts you to argue his point. He gives you all the rationales for why his point is right and yours is wrong. No matter how you try to tell him why you believe the way you do, he just gives you more rationales that You make him right.'” When you tell him he hurt your feelings, he says you shouldn’t feel that way. “He doesn’t seem to care that you’re in pain.”
- He has unmet needs in his life.
Your husband may feel like he is missing something in life. He may have never achieved his goals of winning something or having what he desires in life that he does not have. However, not everyone can win at everything because life doesn’t work that way, and he cannot accept the fact that this is true.
