Love is the closest thing we have to real magic. However, we rarely talk about platonic love even though it forms an important part of our lives. Below we look at what platonic love is and how important healthy platonic feelings are.
What is platonic love?
Quite simply, deep platonic love refers to a form of non-sexual love. Platonic relationships generally involve a deep friendship of a non-sexual nature between two people of different sexes who may or may not be the opposite sex. In today’s world, platonic affection refers to a loving relationship between two or more people in which sexual attraction and drives are absent, particularly when sexual interest can easily be assumed by others.
The term platonic love derives its name from the famous Greek philosopher Plato. In his work The Symposium, Plato discussed at length the idea of true love in honor of Eros, the Greek god of love. Through his discussions with his guests, the idea of platonic love was formed in their dialogues. His idea of platonic love and the platonic relationship was not based on lust or sexual relations. When answering the question of what is platonic love, Plato defined this passion and passion as a form of love that does not depend on sexual attraction. Instead, deep platonic love makes us feel connected, motivates us to pursue our dreams and passions, inspires us to improve ourselves and enables us to feel enlightened and connected to the Supreme Being. Furthermore, there are many benefits to platonic relationships such as a sense of belonging, stable connection, lowered expectations, and lifelong bonds.
How does platonic love feel in modern times
Today the answer to the question – what is platonic love? – The meaning of a platonic relationship has changed radically and is widely used to denote good friends, without any “benefits”. These relationships share a strong bond and affection for one another, yet there is no romantic or sexual attraction. But like Plato’s original version, today’s Platonic relationships can be meaningful and deep, leading to lifelong friendships.
There are different types of platonic relationships that hold healthy boundaries, trust, respect, admiration, gratitude, honesty, and are free of anxiety or jealousy. When trying to discover what platonic love is, we need to recognize that platonic feelings are the key to the unique, spiritual, and strong bond between two people who trust, respect, love, and care for one another. This platonic relationship is usually based on similar goals, common interests, shared worldviews and a deep spiritual connection. It’s a relationship where you feel comfortable being your true self without worrying about being criticized or abandoned.
Critical elements of platonic love
Platonic relationships are simply good friendships that inspire us to be better. However, friendships and relationships have become very complicated today. Let’s take a look at some of the characteristics and signs of platonic love and relationships. This will help us identify and nurture them to create lifelong friendships with the people we love and care about.
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Here are some of the basic elements that define what platonic love is –
- Absolute honesty
Pure and genuine honesty is one of the hallmarks of platonic friendship. Unlike romantic relationships, a platonic relationship or friendship has no space for anxiety or fear of abandonment or infidelity. No need for white lies or deception. Since they are not your partner, you are not worried about them leaving you. Since this is not an exclusive relationship, the stakes are not high. This is a crucial aspect when discovering – what is platonic love?
Platonic affection is natural and devoid of any coercion. In a platonic friendship, you don’t have to worry about being overly sensitive about telling the truth. You don’t have to think about what to say because it might hurt the other person’s feelings. It is based on brutal honesty which is often one of the foundations of a great friendship. In such a relationship, you can talk about things that you cannot in a romantic relationship, you can openly discuss your flaws and ask questions that we might not be able to ask our romantic partners.
Romantic relationships are delicate and need nurturing. Platonic relationships are less sensitive and can tolerate brutal honesty. There is no pressure to keep the peace in a platonic friendship. You can argue, fight, and still have a healthy, supportive relationship with your platonic friend after your emotional wounds have healed.
- Healthy boundaries
Even though our platonic friends may not be as valuable as our romantic partners, we still love and appreciate them. Hence, we respect their personal boundaries. However, a platonic relationship may need some strong and healthy personal boundaries. They are usually not directly stated or discussed, but are followed like the unwritten rules of a relationship.
New or developing friendships may not have defined or fixed boundaries. As they begin to share more experiences with each other and understand and accept differences in interest and attraction in friendship, platonic love can blossom. The more they learn about and respect boundaries in a relationship, the stronger the bond. As the relationship progresses, we can become aware of the limits we can push and how far. Setting boundaries can help you describe what platonic love is to you.
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- There are no expectations
Expectations are one of the main reasons most romantic relationships get complicated. Many times we have unrealistic expectations of our romantic and sexual partners, and when they are not met, this can lead to a lot of conflict and complications and may lead to a breakup. However, deep platonic love is not defined by the trappings of commitment, caring, loyalty, and expectations.
Aside from the different types of platonic relationships, joint obligations, paying bills or a mortgage, are generally absent in such relationships. You are not responsible for anything, except for maintaining and nurturing the relationship and friendship. Not having expectations from each other is one of the biggest benefits of platonic relationships. This is what makes it practical and durable.
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- Selflessness
Our ability to be selfless in a friendship can also help you understand what platonic love is. When it comes to platonic love, we usually act selflessly. Despite how much you love your romantic partner, there will always be an aspect of selfishness in that relationship. Committed relationships often cause us to act and act in ways that may not fully reflect who we really are. We act selfishly to protect our partnership with our spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend. Although we may tend to be unselfish in love, we often have a selfish impulse in our gentlest gestures toward our romantic partners. We want them to love us and invest in the relationship. In romantic relationships, the need for the relationship takes on more importance than the need for the individual.
However, in a platonic friendship, we do things for the good of our friends, regardless of how it affects the relationship. We often fall back on our platonic boyfriend when they enter a new relationship or when they want to spend more time with their romantic partners. This is because we realize that it is what is best for them even though it may not be good for our friendship. Platonic love teaches us to give space to those we care about. So we learn to let them go.
This is a selfless act and we gain nothing personal from it. However, seeing our platonic friend happy and content makes us feel happy, hoping that we will be able to reconnect again soon.
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Platonic love is uncomplicated
So what is platonic love? A platonic relationship is not complicated, unlike romantic relationships. However, it is important to decide and clarify what this relationship is and where you should draw the line. Once the terms of the relationship are clear between both people and their commitment to keeping the relationship dynamic, such platonic friendships can work out great.
It is this aspect of being honest and having no expectations that makes platonic love truly valuable. It is a relationship where you can be your true self, depend on someone for companionship for life and live your own life without worrying about losing your friend.
Platonic love shows us that we are loved and gives us new perspectives on how we should love someone: by being honest, respecting boundaries, letting go of unrealistic expectations, and doing what is best for the person we love.
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