Ah yes, narcissists! What a fun group of people who abuse you and ruin your relationships and your life. While narcissists are horrible to be with as they are, it can be difficult to be around a showmanship narcissist. But what is a showy narcissist?
Let’s take a deep dive and learn how to spot one and protect yourself from treacherous mind games.
What is a showy narcissist?
Narcissism is a personality trait and it can manifest in different ways such as the vulnerable narcissist, the wardrobe narcissist, the toxic narcissist, the showmanship narcissist and many others. So what exactly is a showy narcissist?
What is a narcissist?
Display narcissism definition: Display narcissists are people with narcissistic traits who constantly crave attention, affection, admiration, and praise.
They can make anything and everything about themselves and be very charismatic and humorous about it. However, since they are so desperate for attention, validation, and adoration, they can go to great lengths to make it happen.
While people with narcissistic traits are usually thought to lack empathy, individuals with showmanship narcissism understand and recognize what you’re going through but simply don’t care. Although they may lack emotional empathy (the ability to share and relate to other people’s feelings), they still have cognitive empathy that enables them to understand your state of mind.
How do narcissists like to show off?
Show-off narcissists believe they are better than most people and believe their behavior is “normal.” They are unaware of the fact that most people are not like them and that their words, reactions, actions, and behavior are toxic and offensive. People with showy narcissistic personality disorder have –
Inflated ego
Great self-portrait
A burning need for attention, admiration, and validation from others
lack of awareness
feelings of emptiness
feeling insecure
A strong sense of entitlement
Individuals with exhibitionist narcissistic disorder tend to have a superiority complex, are overly confident, and do not hesitate to criticize and devalue others. They dominate all conversations and quickly change the subject to themselves no matter the mood or situation. They like to talk about themselves, exaggerate their achievements, and give “advice” to others.
But most of all, they desperately need attention. If you’re a little perceptive, you can spot their attention-seeking behavior from a mile away. They will act strangely, dress provocatively to seduce you, act impulsively, flaunt their physical features and wealth, and constantly talk about how amazing they are…all to get your attention.
But there’s more to the question: “What is a showy narcissist like?” Display narcissists feed on the attention they receive and may violate social norms or act inappropriately to get the attention they need.
They are often charming and attractive, which makes it easy for them to attract others. However, they don’t care about others because their primary concern is their own needs and desires.
They are often oblivious to the needs and feelings of others and may use others for their own needs without any regard for the well-being of others.
They will violate your boundaries and will not respect your opinions, emotions, needs, desires, or accomplishments unless it serves their purpose. They often take advantage of others to achieve their own goals. They may also have a distorted sense of self, poor self-esteem, a lack of accountability, and difficulty accepting criticism.
Related: 7 Stages Of An Emotional Abuser’s Trap
13 Traits of an exhibitionist narcissist
Now that we have an idea of “what is a showy narcissist?” Let’s take a look at some of the most common and defining traits that most individuals with showy narcissistic personality disorder possess –
- Attention-seeking behavior
Display narcissists crave attention and may engage in attention-seeking behavior to get what they need. They desperately need praise and admiration from others. Thus, they may dress provocatively, speak loudly, or act in a way that draws attention to themselves.
They may engage in risky or impulsive behaviors, such as drug use or reckless driving, to get a thrill or to impress others. They may also seek attention through their achievements or wealth.
- Greatness
Showy narcissists have an inflated sense of self-importance and believe they are special, unique, and superior to others. They may exaggerate their accomplishments, talents, or abilities to attract attention and admiration. They expect others to recognize and praise them for being special.
They may also believe that they are entitled to special treatment and privileges, and may become angry or resentful if they feel that they are not being given the attention or respect that they believe they deserve.
- Lack of empathy
Showy narcissists lack empathy and are often oblivious to the needs and feelings of others. They may have difficulty empathizing with others and may lack the ability to understand or care about other people’s feelings.
They may ignore the needs or feelings of others and prioritize meeting their own needs, wants, and interests. They may also have a callous attitude towards others and not feel guilt or remorse for their actions.
- Manipulation
Showy narcissists may use manipulation to get what they want. They may use charm, flattery, play mind games, use emotional blackmail, and other tactics to influence and control others or to gain their trust. They may also lie or deceive others to get what they want or to avoid responsibility for their actions. - There are no limits
Showy narcissists may have weak boundaries and may find it difficult to respect others’ boundaries. They won’t hesitate for a second before invading your personal space and being intrusive or overly familiar, making you feel uncomfortable or violated.
They may also ignore social norms or rules, or violate the rights of others. They tend to expect others to cater to their needs and wants without regard for their own needs or feelings.
- Lack of self-awareness
When trying to figure out “what is a showy narcissist?”, we need to address the most important aspect of showmanship narcissism – the apparent lack of self-awareness. One of the main features of narcissism is a lack of empathy, which can lead to a lack of self-awareness. Narcissists may be so focused on themselves and their own needs and desires that they fail to recognize how their behavior affects others.
Hence, showy narcissists may not be aware of the impact of their behavior on others. They may be unable to see their flaws or shortcomings and may reject or minimize any negative feedback or criticism they receive. However, not all narcissists lack self-awareness. Some may be aware of their behavior and its effect on others but choose to ignore or minimize it.
Related: 6 Telltale Signs You’re Dating a Narcissist, Expert Reveals
- Arrogance
Because they may have a sense of superiority, individuals with the exhibitionist narcissistic disorder may look down on others they consider inferior. They may belittle or criticize others to make themselves feel better or to assert their dominance. They may also refuse to admit fault or take responsibility for their behaviors and actions, blaming others instead. - Envy
The showmanship narcissist may become jealous of others who they perceive as enjoying relatively greater attention, admiration, or success. They may feel threatened by others they see as competitors and may try to undermine or sabotage them to regain their superior position.
- A sense of entitlement
Showy narcissists believe they deserve special treatment and privileges. They may feel worthy of admiration or attention or believe they are entitled to take advantage of others to get what they want. They may believe that the rules do not apply to them and that they are above the law. They may become angry or upset when their expectations are not met. - Exploitation of others
This type of narcissist may take advantage of others for their own goals and gains. They may use, manipulate, lie, or deceive others to get what they want without any concern for the welfare of others. They may also use others for emotional support, financial gain, or to boost their self-esteem. - Lack of accountability
Showy narcissists often lack accountability for their actions and may shift blame onto others. They may refuse or refuse to take responsibility for their actions, mistakes, or shortcomings and may refuse to apologize or make amends, even when it is clear that they are at fault. They can blatantly blame others for their failures and deny any wrongdoing. - Inability to accept criticism
People with these narcissistic traits are unable to accept criticism and may react defensively or aggressively when criticized. Since they have such a fragile sense of self-worth, they can easily become hostile when faced with negative feedback or criticism. They may see any criticism as an attack on their ego and feel belittled, even when the criticism is constructive. They may become dismissive of the person who criticizes them. - Impulsiveness
Showy narcissists may act impulsively without considering the consequences of their actions. They may act on their desires without properly thinking about it and may engage in risky behaviors or make impulsive decisions that are self-serving and could harm themselves or others.
Oppositional narcissists are the classic stereotype
What do you think of when you hear the word “narcissist”? A self-obsessed person? Someone who doesn’t care about others? Someone is constantly posting new photos on social media to get more likes? Well, this is your typical narcissist.
So what is a showy narcissist? Well, it fits the bill when it comes to describing narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) as mentioned in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). Showy narcissism is the classic form of this personality disorder.
They are like the toxic version of children who are constantly thinking about how to get someone’s attention because they have a strong “please look at me” attitude. Similar to children, these narcissists don’t care or care about what the other person might be facing. They only care about the attention they are not receiving at the moment.
However, as children grow up and mature, they become sympathetic, gentle, and compassionate. But oppositional narcissists do not. They are never satisfied with the attention they receive.
Being the stereotypical version of narcissists, they believe they are special and believe they deserve love, admiration, attention, and success without having to put any actual effort into it. They think they are cool, more powerful, smarter, and more attractive than others. They think they are better than their loved ones, spouse/partner, friends, and family members.
While they may struggle emotionally with insecurities, they never express them before others. Instead, they humiliate, devalue, and put others down to hide their insecurities and insecurities that could make them appear uncaring, callous, and rude.
Related: Spotting the Warning Signs: How to Recognize Breadcrumbing in Your Relationship
Are exhibitionist narcissists toxic?
Although exhibitionist narcissists are not necessarily abusive or vicious, they can be self-obsessed, toxic, and downright annoying.
She is charming and arrogant.
They are arrogant and very confident.
They must be the center of attention.
They have black-and-white thinking and always think of the absolute.
They cannot accept criticism, even if it is productive.
They make it all about themselves.
They like to manipulate people and situations to get what they want.
They pretend to be perfect – the perfect partner, the perfect friend, the perfect employee, etc.
But behind it all, they hide their fragile sense of self. When challenged or protested, a person with exhibitionist narcissism can become defensive and hostile to protect their vulnerable ego.
How to identify a showy narcissist
While we may have a clear understanding of “what is a showy narcissist?”, we still need to know how to spot it in our life. Here’s how to spot someone in the wild –
- They are desperate to be the center of attention
The exhibitionist narcissist is in desperate need of attention, validation, and admiration and they can go to any lengths to get it. They may display behaviors that catch your attention such as –
He speaks loudly
Showing off their looks
flaunt their wealth
Make great claims
No matter who may be speaking or what the topic of discussion is, they interrupt others and start talking about themselves. They can easily change the topic of an ongoing conversation to make it revolve around them. They may also seek positions of power or influence to become the center of attention in a social setting.
- They get upset easily
If you find the courage to criticize a showy narcissist, you need to be ready to face his wrath. They have fragile egos and may become defensive or hostile if they feel criticized or challenged.
They may criticize or try to denigrate others to protect their self-image. They may also see themselves as victims of unfair treatment of others or jealousy.
- They think they are special
Narcissism and an inflated sense of self-importance go hand in hand. Showy narcissists believe they are unique and important and therefore deserve special treatment. They may overestimate their abilities, achievements, or social status. They may also expect others to treat them with respect and admiration, regardless of their behavior or actions.
- They will violate your boundaries
Exhibitionist narcissists intrude and will frequently intrude on your personal space, both physical and mental. While they constantly seek attention and admiration, they don’t consider other people’s needs important. They will shamelessly enter your life and space whenever they feel like it without permission.
For example, if you live with such a narcissistic person, he may enter your room without knocking, making you feel uncomfortable and anxious. They may also get too involved in your personal life, trying to control you, making decisions for you, and taking advantage of your achievements.
- They don’t care about your feelings
Being low in emotional empathy, they are unable to feel your pain and connect with your emotions. This lack of awareness of self and others makes them disinterested and unconcerned with other people’s feelings.
While they may have cognitive empathy and fully understand how their behavior affects you, they simply won’t care. For exhibitionist narcissists, only their emotions matter. you don’t. They find it difficult to put themselves in the shoes of others. So they ignore other people’s feelings or needs and prioritize their own.
- They devalue others to control them
“Why do you have to be so stupid all the time? Can’t you do anything right?”
Sound familiar? Showy narcissists will verbally abuse others to control and control them. If you manage to offend them in some way or refuse to fulfill their desires, they will immediately explode and will not hold back from criticizing, humiliating, belittling, and devaluing you.
Since they feel they deserve everything, they won’t hesitate to ruin your life if you challenge them in some way or disagree with them. They will play unfairly and use the dirtiest tricks in the book to bring you down if you are bothering them.
- They are obsessed with their looks
Narcissists being narcissists are obsessed with their appearance. They tend to spend a lot of time and money on their appearance. They may wear flashy or provocative clothes, wear excessive makeup, or undergo cosmetic procedures. They may also obsess over excessive exercise or dieting to ensure they look visually appealing and attractive. - They like to take advantage of others
Manipulating and exploiting the people around them is their favorite pastime. When learning about “what is a showy narcissist?” Wondering how to identify them, and spotting their exploitative habits is like a no-brainer.
They take advantage of others to get what they want and manipulate or use people for their gain, without regard for their feelings or well-being. They may also engage in behaviors that are harmful or destructive to others, without feeling remorse or guilt.
- They are very selfish
For a showmanship narcissist, their needs and wants matter more to you than your own. If you are married to such a narcissist, their work and hobbies will take a higher priority than your relationship or household chores. They don’t care how it affects you or your life as long as they do what they want.
They assume that they are entitled to do whatever they want and that others in the family handle the responsibilities. They are very selfish and don’t care about other people’s needs.
- They brag about themselves
Show-off narcissists may brag about their accomplishments or abilities, often exaggerating their accomplishments to make themselves appear more impressive. They may also drop names or talk about their connections to famous or influential people.
They may flaunt their wealth or status by wearing expensive clothes, driving fancy cars, or living in lavish homes. They may also look for social events or clubs that cater to the rich or elite.
However, not all narcissists display all of these traits, and some people may have narcissistic tendencies without meeting the full criteria for narcissistic personality disorder.
If you notice these traits in someone you know, it may be worth considering the possibility that they are a showy narcissist and taking steps to protect themselves from their potentially harmful behavior.
6 ways to deal with a showy narcissist
Are you wondering how you can interact positively with a showy narcissist without letting their toxicity affect you? Well, here are some strategies for dealing with them while avoiding all that drama –
- Set clear boundaries
If you want to keep their toxic narcissism out of your life for good, set strong boundaries and be firm about maintaining them. The exhibitionist narcissist will always do his best to push your limits. So be clear about acceptable and unacceptable behavior, and stick to your boundaries. - Don’t be a catalyst
An enabler is a person who enables, encourages, or allows the narcissist to engage in toxic behavior and continue their destructive behavioral patterns. Empowerment includes making excuses for their behavior, ignoring the consequences of their actions, offering financial support, or taking responsibility for their problems.
If you want to deal smartly with a showy narcissist, don’t give in to their demands for attention or validation. This can reinforce their behavior and make change more difficult.
- Avoid asking for attention
If you live with someone who suffers from exhibitionist narcissism, you will be haunted by their constant and incessant need for attention. The best way to deal with this is to ignore their attention-seeking behavior. Do not engage them or give them the attention they are looking for, as this can reinforce their behavior.
Related: What I Learned From Living With A Narcissist
- Avoid confrontation
Narcissists tend to get defensive when challenged or confronted, so avoid confronting or arguing with them directly. You can never win an argument with a toxic narcissist and stay sane. So it is best to communicate your concerns calmly and firmly. - Keeping records
Show-off narcissists are masters of gaslighting, a psychological manipulation strategy that causes you to question your sanity. So be sure to keep a record of their behavior, including specific dates, times, and actions.
Make a video or audio recording, write down details, and take photos as evidence. Not only can this serve as a guide when you begin to doubt yourself, but it can also be helpful if you need to seek legal or professional help.
- Ask for support
It may be helpful to seek the support of a therapist or counselor who can help you develop coping strategies and set healthy boundaries. Not only can mental health professionals help you develop healthy coping techniques, but they can also help you deal with the negative feelings, such as stress and anxiety, that come from living with a narcissist.
You can also seek help and support from trusted loved ones as they may provide helpful guidance and help you gain a different perspective on the situation. Remember, dealing with a showy narcissist can be challenging, and you must take care of yourself. Don’t hesitate to ask for help if you need it.
Protect yourself from narcissistic opponents
So what is a showy narcissist? They are individuals with a deep need for attention and admiration and their desperation can lead to disruptive, attention-seeking, manipulative, and exploitative behaviour. Dealing with a exhibitionist narcissist can be difficult, but setting clear boundaries, seeking support, and avoiding enabling behavior are important steps to take.
By identifying the symptoms of exhibitionist narcissism and taking the necessary steps to protect yourself, you can reduce the impact their behavior has on your life.