Narcissists are known for ruthlessly manipulating others to dominate and control them.
However, when they realize that their plan has been exposed, and their exaggerated sense of entitlement and superiority will explode.
In their minds, the tables have turned, and they can no longer control their victim and this calls for a great deal of anger within the narcissist’s soul.
In most cases, there is no need to fear for your life; narcissists are generally nonviolent people with child-like insecurities.
However, that doesn’t mean that they don’t have the capacity to do some very evil things to the person who has the audacity to cut off their supply.
If you are a victim of narcissistic abuse, you will need to think and act quickly to escape the clutches of a narcissist because if there is one thing a narcissist will not do willingly, it is to accept defeat. When a Narcissist Knows You’ve Got Him, Prepare for War!
How Does a Narcissist React When He Knows You’ve Got Him?
Narcissists feel an urgent need to control others; There is more to their obsessive desire to control others than just their desire to control their own space.
Fundamentally, it is about protecting themselves from narcissistic injury; any attack on their self-esteem or ego is devastating to them.
Narcissists live in constant fear of losing control; they need to be appreciated and admired at all times by those around them.
They are the ones in control, and their thought processes lead them to believe that they have the right to abuse their partners if they do not comply with their excessive demands.
When the narcissist is unable to control their victim, they bombard them with narcissistic rage.
Narcissistic rage is a primitive, childish, immature expression of their needs.
According to psychologist Adam Plattner, narcissists go through seven levels of rage:
Anxiety: Indirectly expressing their anger.
Tension: Feeling angry internally.
Irritability: Showing slight hints of resentment.
Agitation: Showing their anger without blaming their partner.
Frustration: Using harsh words or scowling.
Related : What happens When You Ignore a Narcissist Who Dumped You?
Anger: Yelling, swearing, and verbally expressing to their partner that they are angry.
Anger: Losing control of their temper, acting aggressively, and getting angry.
The bottom line is that when they can’t control you, and the narcissist knows you understand them, they no longer have a source of supply, and narcissists find this very difficult to deal with.
How long can a narcissist go without a source?
Narcissists exploit attention, applause, admiration, and approval. When this supply runs out or is no longer available, they suffer from what is known as Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
This is similar to depression, where there is a change in eating and sleeping patterns, they become lethargic and seem constantly sad.
They no longer take pleasure in things they used to enjoy such as interests, hobbies and activities.
Narcissists may suffer from violent mood swings and often turn to alternative addictions such as drugs or alcohol, they will become addicted to shopping or engage in reckless driving.
They will withdraw into a distant, dream-like world where there is plenty of narcissistic supply.
So the short answer to how long can a narcissist go without a supply? Not for long.
Think of it this way, how long can a heroin addict go without heroin before they start showing a physical withdrawal reaction? Not for long, right?
Once they start to feel the pain of not having the drug in their system, they will find a way to get their next fix by any means necessary.
The same goes for narcissists; They are addicted to power, and the feeling of being in control of others is like a drug to them, and when they run out, they will do everything they can to find their next fix.
So, things can get very complicated when you decide to end a relationship with a narcissist.
Do narcissists care if you move on?
Not particularly. When you decide to break up with your narcissistic partner, they won’t be upset that you’re moving on, they’ll be more angry that you had the nerve to leave them because that’s their job.
As a result, they’ll do everything they can to make your life hell. Here’s what you can expect when you break up with a narcissist:
Confronting a Narcissist?
Narcissists live in a fantasy world where they not only believe they’re superior to everyone else, but they also believe they’re invincible.
So when a partner or friend confronts a narcissist, they see it as an attack on their ego, and if they don’t have another source of supply at their disposal, they’ll come at you like a raging fire.
He’ll get really angry if you decide to end the relationship. It’s normal to feel hurt after a breakup, and depending on how much he values his relationship, the average person will want answers or try to get his partner back.
There will likely be some excessive texting, emailing, or phone calls.
He may even show up at your ex’s job or home. But after a while, once logic takes over and you regain control of your emotions, you’ll stop.
A narcissist, on the other hand, won’t do that, and depending on the severity of the NPD, he’ll wage an all-out war against you.
Why Does a Narcissist Want You Back When He Knows You Don’t Want Him Anymore?
When a narcissist knows you’ve gotten it, he’ll hate the fact that you’ve gotten over him; after all, that’s his job.
Once he feels he’s gotten all he can from you, he moves on to his next victim. A person with NPD will see your decision as abandonment.
Unless you feel that your life would be in imminent danger if you sat down with your partner and told them why you left them, the proper thing to do is to have this conversation.
When you do, a typical narcissist will ignore your needs and focus on their own.
They won’t empathize with your plight, nor will they understand why you need to leave for the sake of your mental health; it’s all about them at the end of the day.
In other words, a narcissist doesn’t want you back because they love you madly; they want you back because you’ve cut off their supply of narcissism.
What Happens When You Confront a Narcissist?
They’ll cry, beg, and plead, but this response isn’t because they’re afraid of losing the love of their life, it’s because they no longer have control over you and their selfish behavior has been exposed.
When you confront a narcissist, you’re letting them know that you know who they really are, and that’s the worst thing that can happen to a narcissist.
The only thing they grieve for is their loss of power. As a result, narcissistic abusers have been known to harass and stalk their ex-victims for months, and in extreme cases, years after the relationship has ended.
Another possibility is that they start bombarding you with text messages, emails, phone calls, or contacting you on social media.
When that doesn’t work, they may start sending you threatening messages, love bombarding you, or both.
They will swing between tenderness and anger, causing a roller coaster of emotions for their victim who wants to be left alone, but at the same time they will wonder if their ex’s behavior was a genuine attempt to get them back.
What Happens When a Narcissist Is Outed?
You won’t see the full extent of a narcissist’s true personality until they expose it.
This is especially true for malignant narcissists; Once you confront the narcissist about their behavior, they will try to convince you that you are imagining it and that you are the one with the problem.
When the narcissist knows that you have exposed them, they will try to manipulate you in an attempt to get inside your mind and make you feel like you are the crazy one.
If their tactics fail and you decide to end the relationship, they will do so in cleverly designed text messages or through some form of written communication.
Narcissists use a technique called “baiting” which involves using their words to put you on a sales pitch in an attempt to “lure” the victim back into their web of charm.
But when you resist their pleas and refuse to meet up, remain friends, or rekindle the relationship, the narcissist will start hurling abuse at you again.
Related :; The Narcissist Discard Phase: 3 Signs a Final Discard is Coming
This is the same split personality that lured you in in the first place. Love bombing and then abuse.
Does a Narcissist Forget You?
If there is one thing a narcissist will never do, it is forget you if they are not winning.
So, they will try every trick available to get your attention, and one of them is making you jealous. He will do this by flaunting his new relationship to your face.
Psychologists recommend that once you decide to break up with a narcissistic partner, the most logical thing to do is to block him, his friends, and his family members on all platforms.
That way, you won’t accidentally get a glimpse into his new life.
No matter how strong you think you are, most victims of narcissistic abuse will always remember how good the love bombing phase of their relationship was.
And being physically reminded of this by seeing pictures of your ex and their new partner can quickly send you into a downward spiral of self-blame and self-doubt, opening the door to thinking about getting them back.
So should you tell a narcissist they’re a narcissist?
This is not a good idea; first and foremost, it’s a pointless endeavor. Unless the narcissist is at the point where they’re ready to change, telling them will only make them very angry.
Not because you’re telling them they’re a narcissist, but because you’ve figuratively ripped the mask off their face and they now feel very vulnerable.
Related : Why Do Narcissists Get Jealous? The Narcissist and Jealousy
Vulnerability is something narcissists avoid at all costs because their main goal is to convince everyone they’re someone else.
If you feel the need to confront someone about their narcissistic behavior, think about why you are doing so in advance and weigh the pros and cons of having this type of conversation with a narcissist.
If you truly believe it will help them, then go ahead; if it doesn’t, it’s best to keep this information to yourself.
FinalThoughts
What happens when a narcissist finds out you’ve found out? This is a question many people in a relationship ask when they realize they are dating a narcissist.
This question is often asked out of fear, accepting that the person you’ve been sharing your intimate space with is suffering from a mental illness is scary, and your primary concern will be your safety.
Not everyone chooses to leave a relationship at this point; if your partner is not abusive, you may want to work things out.
However, if you are a victim of narcissistic abuse and have decided to cut ties, make sure you cut off contact with them completely.
If you feel your life is in danger, file a police report and let your support network know what is happening. Your safety is always your first priority.