Why do narcissists ruin the holidays? Because narcissists deserve attention and love. Narcissists and people with group B personality disorder thrive on sabotaging special occasions like birthdays and holidays.

Narcissists and the Holidays

If you are reading this, then you have a narcissist in your life. And so it’s crucial to realize that narcissistic people love to ruin birthdays and holidays and let you try to make sense of all the toxic drama.

However, the truth is that despite your best attempts, you can never truly understand their narcissism. In fact, you become more confused about their toxic behaviors during Christmas as they tend to become more aggressive.

So you’re asking yourself “Why do narcissists ruin Christmas?” You’re left wondering “Why do narcissists ruin the holidays?”

Simply because they feel empowered by sucking joy out of other people’s lives, by turning a time of happiness into a time of suffering and tears. If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, there is no doubt that the holidays are a very scary time for you.

Narcissistic people believe that the holidays are a great time and make a special effort to spread their toxicity by distorting expectations and cultural norms around the holidays. They will start pretending to be warm and cheerful and find great ways to manipulate, control and hurt you.

Regardless of whether you celebrate the holiday or not, they will never miss this opportunity to feed their fragile egos and almost non-existent self-esteem.

Related: Have You Been the Victim of Narcissistic Triangulation?

Holidays and birthdays are favorite times for narcissists because such celebrations create stress and spoil the festivities, and they can easily shatter your self-esteem and feelings. So, if you’re stumped as to “Why do narcissists ruin holidays?” This is your answer.

They don’t want to see you happy. Narcissists ruin birthdays. Narcissists spoil special occasions. And narcissists spoil your happiness and peace of mind. the reason? The narcissist cannot stand your happiness.

Narcissists are masters of seasonal devaluation and devaluation especially during festivities and use their abusive tactics on the people closest to them. But why do narcissists ruin the holidays?

Because they need to be the center of attention. However, there are a number of other reasons. Lacking empathy and unable to handle intimate relationships, they are forced to destroy them.

Why do narcissists spoil holidays?

Narcissists spoil birthdays and holidays. Narcissists ruin celebrations even when all your family and friends are there to have a good time. It gives them more satisfaction to spoil your happiness than to celebrate the occasion.

Here are some common reasons why narcissists spoil birthdays and other special occasions:

1. Narcissists hate intimacy
   Vacations are about intimacy and responsibilities. It is about strengthening bonds and making memories through sharing positive experiences. Unfortunately, narcissists hate building healthy, strong bonds with anyone.

Intimacy is something they are afraid of because it requires them to care for others and take responsibility for them. Intimacy makes them restless and unable to deal with being vulnerable. As this anxiety triggers the fight-or-flight response, they either run away or ruin the holidays for everyone.

2. Narcissists lack empathy
   The holidays are about giving and sharing in happiness. But narcissistic people can never experience joy in making others happy because they lack empathy.

Furthermore, they don’t want to waste their time celebrating someone else – whether it’s their birthday, graduation, or a promotion.

Instead, they experience envy and jealousy because people celebrate someone else’s accomplishments and not their own. When this experience becomes unbearable for them, they destroy everything for others. This is one of the most honest answers to the question – why do narcissists ruin the holidays?

3. Urgent need for attention
   And it doesn’t matter whether the attention they get is good or bad.

If you don’t do the festivities to celebrate the glorious existence of narcissists, they will make sure to get your attention by hurting others.

When it comes to holidays and celebrations, if it’s not for narcissists in a positive way where they get all the attention, they will get toxic and make it all about them in the most negative way possible. All they want is attention.

4. Narcissists love misery
   When we try to figure out why narcissists ruin holidays, we have to consider the fact that they thrive on misery. It’s like their default setting. They thrive on misery. Hence, when they find an environment full of love, joy, and positivity, they do their best to make it miserable.

These are the toxic individuals who spread their toxic energy to others and make the happiest environments miserable. Destroying your happiness is like winning them a Nobel Prize. This is why narcissists spoil birthdays and holidays.

Related: 7 Signs Your Mother Is An Exhibitionist Narcissist

5. A new source of narcissistic presentation
   Still wondering why narcissists spoil birthdays and holidays? This is because they need the admiration and attention of others. The narcissistic display is the reason why narcissistic people cancel dates or vacation plans at the last minute.

Although they may have had enough of the narcissistic supply, the alternative and new supply makes them feel excited and excited. This is the latest and unacceptable they need to take control.

So when you find yourself excited about a particular event or occasion, the narcissist will jump in at the last minute to spoil it for you. They simply love to set your expectations and then disappoint you.

What can you do about it?

Holidays and birthdays are a nightmare with narcissists. The narcissist doesn’t care if an event or holiday has special meaning to you. They just want to see you miserable like them. They are twisted, pathological individuals who will do anything to suck the happiness out of you.

But is there anything you can do about it? no. No matter what you do, the narcissist will never completely change, even with treatment. You can only change yourself.

Here are some things you can do to overcome narcissistic abusive behavior when wondering why narcissists are sabotaging the holidays:

1. Don’t get involved in their toxic drama
   Narcissists and birthdays don’t go hand in hand. When you interact with a narcissist, you will make them feel powerful while affecting your mental and emotional stability.

I simply refuse to play their toxic games. Stay positive and stay busy with your own things. Don’t let them affect your mood and emotions. Avoid taking their toxic words and behavior personally and focus on your vacation plans instead. It’s also important to remain flexible in how you celebrate the occasion.

2. Get away
   The moment you realize your narcissistic personality toxins are ruining your vacation, you need to start taking care of yourself right now. Simply walk away and avoid them. Realize that you cannot change another person, however, you can fully control your thoughts, emotions, attitudes, and choices.

You only need to get out of the room or even the house. You don’t have to take their offensive behavior in any way. When you choose to walk away, you won’t be asking, “Why do narcissists ruin holidays?” What length? You will be free from their misuse.

3. Don’t invite the narcissist
   No matter how close they are to you, if you think they can’t be trusted and can spoil the occasion for everyone, don’t invite them at all. Be strong and brave enough to say no, explains Ewa of Soul GPS.

If you think a narcissist might be secretly insulting others, simply remove their name from the guest list.

4. Create strong boundaries
   Narcissistic people hate personal boundaries. But those same boundaries can protect your emotional and mental health and the well-being of your loved ones.

Setting strong boundaries is essential to protecting yourself from mental, emotional, and even physical harm. But remember, the point of boundaries is to control your own behavior, not the other person’s.

Strengthen yourself against the narcissist

Vacations with a narcissist can be really difficult because narcissistic people just love to ruin holidays. But this does not mean that you need to allow them to steal your joy, happiness and love.

Instead of asking, “Why do narcissists ruin holidays?” Focus on taking steps to overcome their abuse. When you know your narcissist is going to ruin the holidays and you realize you can’t control them, simply distance yourself from their behavior.

Related: 20 Identifying Traits Of A Paranoid Personality in Relationships

Separation will allow you to control your thoughts and emotions, experience inner peace and even save the occasion for everyone. By empowering yourself, you can enjoy your vacation just as you did before knowing your narcissist.