When people think of narcissists, they often assume that they all experienced some form of trauma during childhood. This assumption is made because it is believed that the root cause of narcissism is unresolved trauma and an attempt to deal with it. However, this is not always the case.
Not all narcissists experienced childhood trauma, and many develop narcissistic traits without any history of trauma. This is why searching for the root cause of narcissism can be one of the biggest rabbit holes you go down during your time in a toxic relationship or in your recovery.
In this article, I explain how not all narcissism arises from childhood trauma, how this theory gets us stuck in cognitive dissonance, and how all the different labels for types of narcissism that are created every day help narcissism develop.
Let’s dig deeper.
Not all narcissists develop their narcissism as a defense mechanism
Not all narcissistic individuals are this way because of childhood trauma or deep-rooted shame. Many narcissists develop their narcissistic traits without any traumatic experience and share the same exaggerated sense of self, grandiosity, and entitlement as others of this type. Not to mention, some have developed narcissism because they were overly spoiled as children. They had no accountability for treating people poorly, and no consequences for how they treated people.
But more than that, we are now learning that narcissism can have a genetic component, which means that even the most loving childhood environment will not necessarily prevent them from becoming narcissistic abusers.
To understand how not all narcissists have experienced childhood trauma, it is important to understand what narcissism is. Narcissism is a personality disorder characterized by an exaggerated sense of self-importance, grandiosity, entitlement, and the need for admiration from others. People who possess narcissistic traits typically engage in exploitative or manipulative behavior, have little or no empathy, and show a lack of concern for the feelings of others.
The idea that narcissistic behavior is an attempt to deal with the pain and confusion of unresolved childhood trauma is simply not true of all narcissists.
What if the narcissist you know was born this way because of a genetic predisposition? All those months and years I wasted believing they were that way because of trauma, but then it turned out it was all genetic. So all those months and years of research you’ve completed don’t even apply to the person you’re with.
If you want accurate insider information about the root cause of narcissism, you don’t want to put all of your focus on the field of mainstream psychology and the DSM. Look at the work of FBI profilers, criminologists, forensic psychologists, and the Dark Trinity. Because of all the information. Misinformation, and even the misinformation we see on the Internet regarding the root cause of narcissism is the biggest cause of cognitive dissonance.
Exploring the ancient causation of narcissism
Most of what you read about the root cause of narcissism is based on old Freudian concepts, and much of this outdated causation of narcissism is what is going wrong in our world today. Some too many people call themselves experts, too many people spread information without scientific backing, and too many labels are being created to categorize different types of narcissistic abusers.
Simply put, many people insist that all narcissists are like this because of trauma.
Psychology itself is not based on science and is entirely subjective. Certainly, we have the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, and that was a good start. It was a good basis, but the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders does not allow for other reasons to present people as narcissists or whatever their condition may be. This is why one person can go to three different therapists and leave those offices with three different diagnoses.
Narcissism has been around for centuries, but recent research on the disorder has revealed that the ancient causes of narcissism are no longer applicable. For many years, narcissism was seen as a character flaw, as those who displayed narcissistic traits were seen as vain, selfish, and overly ambitious. This view of narcissism has been debunked in recent years, with research revealing that narcissistic behavior is often the result of a combination of environmental and genetic factors.
One of the reasons why narcissism is outdated is that it results from a need for attention and admiration. While narcissistic individuals may seek attention and admiration, recent research has found that this is only a small part of the disorder. Instead, narcissism is seen as a combination of personality traits, such as grandiosity, entitlement, and a lack of empathy. These traits are thought to result from a combination of environmental and genetic influences, rather than simply a need for attention.
The flaws inherent in mainstream psychology and the DSM
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) is the primary diagnostic tool used to classify mental health disorders in the United States. Despite its widespread use, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders has several inherent flaws.
First, the DSM is largely based on subjective criteria, and diagnoses are often made based on mental health professionals’ impressions rather than objective evidence. This makes it difficult to ensure that diagnoses are accurate and reliable. Furthermore, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders does not consider the possibility of cultural, racial, or gender bias in diagnosis. This means that certain groups of people may be more likely to receive a DSM diagnosis than others, leading to disparities in access to treatment.
Finally, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders does not provide an adequate framework for evaluating the effectiveness of treatments. It does not account for individual differences in how people experience and respond to treatments, nor does it guide how to adjust treatments for different groups of patients. Thus, it is difficult to assess the effectiveness of mental health treatments in a meaningful way.
Overall, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders has significant limitations that must be recognized to ensure accurate diagnosis and effective treatment of mental health disorders.
Creating new labels and categories of narcissism takes our focus away from what is important
The concept of narcissism is complex, and many aspects can be explored. However, most experts agree that there are only three distinct types of narcissism. This is because the three types represent the core characteristics of narcissism, and all other possible variations of narcissism can be seen as a mixture of these three types, or as an extreme version of one of the three types.
The three types of narcissism are arrogant, fragile, and malicious. Grandiose narcissism is characterized by a heightened sense of self-importance, a need for constant admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. Vulnerable narcissism is characterized by feelings of inadequacy, a need for excessive attention and affirmation, and a tendency to be overly sensitive to criticism. Finally, malignant narcissism is characterized by a lack of empathy and a desire to manipulate and control others.
These three types of narcissism are the building blocks of narcissism and include all the different possible expressions of narcissism; Other variations are simply derivatives of the three basic types.
Childish narcissists help narcissism develop right under our noses
The concept of narcissists polarizing children is one that has gained traction in recent years, particularly due to the rise of social media. The idea is that rather than seeing narcissistic behavior as a sign of serious abuse, we instead focus on the positive characteristics of narcissists, such as their charm and charisma, and gloss over the more problematic aspects of their behavior. This can lead to a tendency to justify their more extreme behaviors, such as manipulation and exploitation, as merely the result of a “narcissistic” personality.
Unfortunately, this tendency to childbear narcissists can have serious consequences, as it can lead to a failure to address the underlying issues that cause narcissistic behavior. For example, if narcissists are allowed to move away from their manipulative and exploitative behaviors, they can become more ingrained in their patterns of abuse, making it more difficult to treat the root cause of their narcissism. In addition, child narcissism can cause abuse victims to feel invalidated and not heard, as their stories are seen as exaggerated and exaggerated.
The best way to deal with the issue of child-making by narcissists is to recognize the impact their behavior can have, and to acknowledge and validate the experiences of the victims instead.
