The silent treatment in relationships leads to pain without leaving a clear mark. Are you involved in a relationship with a narcissist? Here’s the truth about the silent treatment, why he won’t reach out to you.

Something isn’t right. The fact that something is wrong has many manifestations in narcissistic dynamism. You may experience sudden outbursts of mood, incitement to the silent treatment as you follow us around the house and try to elicit from us what on earth it is.

You may ask us to show you that all we do is fix you with a malicious look and say nothing. It may escalate to accusing you of various violations that don’t make sense and certainly can’t really be the fault as the allegations have no bearing in reality.

You are loyal, but you are accused of repeat relationships. Does not make sense. You’re told you never listen, but that’s all you seem to do. Obviously, the subject of the scathing accusations is not the real fault.

We may disappear, subject you to bewildering authority, drag you into circular conversation, and mistreat you with the other angelic person, but you are none the wiser as to what is actually wrong.

You repeatedly urge us to explain, clarify, and elaborate on what is causing this behavior, just to speak up and help you understand. Surely it is a reasonable and reasonable request? Be it silent treatments, triangulation, verbally abusive accusations, spanking and many other manifestations, they will all have a common thread; We won’t tell you what’s wrong.

The Silent Treatment Fact: Why Is She So Annoying In Relationships?

Aside from hating being hit, being called names, and all the other effects of the various manipulations being used against you, the simple fact is that people don’t like not knowing things. Being in the dark is confusing and anxiety-provoking.

Not knowing something disturbs people, and makes them unsure and bewildered. Just like not knowing if you got a promotion, the grades from your exam results, the whereabouts of your youngest child when you’re in the supermarket or the outcome of a life-altering decision, the feeling of not knowing is one of the causes of anxiety for most people.

Related: 7 Common Traits Shared By People Who Grew Up In Dysfunctional Families

This becomes a particular problem for empathetic individuals. Not being told what is wrong by a significant other, family member, or friend is even worse for the empathic individual because this offends many traits of the empath.

Do you want help? When you see that someone is upset about something, an instinctive reaction on your part is to want to help them and you can’t help but try. If you aren’t told what it is, you can’t help it and get even more frustrated.

Your tendency to self-examine. If you are not told about the problem, you will spend a great deal of time trying to solve it while replaying conversations, analyzing recent events as you seek the influence of a third party that caused your behavior, and then ultimately examining if you caused the problem and if so how.
You are the power to blame yourself. Without providing you with the details of what causes our behavior, you indulge in the behavior at the second point above, and ultimately all methods lead to a moment of guilt as you flog yourself and decide you must have done something wrong. After all, no one gets upset without a reason they do that.

You are a truth seeker. Accordingly, you need to know what makes us angry or makes us grumpy.
You are a lover of love. The person you love is upset, angry, or tormented, and it hurts you. You suffer from the emotional contagion arising from this and you feel our pain as if it were your own and with whatever pain you want it to stop.
You expect honesty in all dealings, especially from those close to you. You expect us to be honest and tell you what’s bothering us.

You are a problem solver and need to fix a problem that is so obvious in its appearance.
You are a good listener. You want to listen and if we just explain what’s bothering us so much, you’ll easily sit and listen, but please, just tell you what it is.

All of these factors mean that our failure to tell you what’s wrong does a lot of what’s important to you and the result leaves you feeling anxious, confused, hurt, anxious and even angry. This naturally leads to one place. fuel.

From your point of view, you know that if you talk about a problem you will feel better. a common problem and all that. You also know you have the skill set and tools to make everything just right.

You have this selfless willingness to meet the needs of others and treat the sick. You want to cooperate and solve the problem and that way we will feel better and so will you. You can’t get away from not knowing what it is. you must know.

This inescapable desire to know what’s wrong leads to people falling into the trap of finding a reason why we won’t talk to you about it.

This is because the victim does not know what they are dealing with. He or she does not understand that they are dealing with someone of our kind, so instead, they will fall into one of many misguided traps.

These common and incorrect reasons why some people do not talk about a problem are put forward and arise from ignorance of our species. In such cases you will hear comments like

“He’s the strong, silent type.”

“She has trouble trusting people, and that’s why she doesn’t say anything.”

“He feels silly when he admits there is a problem.”

“He wants to sort things out himself.”

“She will not depend on other people. It is pride.”

“He has always learned to handle things on his own.”

“I think the upper lip is solid.”

“He doesn’t do sentiment.”

While there may be a kernel of truth in the applicability of these comments to the situation, it is not the complete and only reason for not reporting the issue to you.

The reason why someone of this nature won’t tell you what’s wrong goes beyond these comments.

the least
If you’re involved with a lesser narcissist, they won’t tell you what’s wrong because they don’t know what’s wrong. His less-developed ability to control his environment means that the slightest disturbance threatens his control as a whole.

You don’t do what he wants, but he doesn’t know what he wants. All he realizes is that something is wrong, but he just can’t identify it. He cannot express who he is and this is manifested in his increasing irritation and irritation.

Accordingly, his perverted logic will easily conclude that you are the problem. You are the problem and your repeated reminders of this shortcoming constitute criticism. Thus, anger flares up and will explode in the form of hot anger.

You’re still trying to ascertain what’s wrong but all you do after that is pour fuel (in both senses) onto the fire that’s burning inside the minuscule.

Related: Do You Love An Abuser? How Can You Stop Being With One

mid-ranger

The Mid-Ranger comes to the same conclusion as the Lesser, that you’re the problem. He’s doing it faster yet as a result of his increased cognitive ability.

He can’t quite put his finger on what you’re doing and it causes his feeling of dread, that feeling of instability and vulnerability, but he knows it has to do with you.

It’s supposed to be you. However, he won’t say it’s you because the interest you generate by him constantly asking him about it makes him feel better. Of course, it’s fuel. He senses that you are the problem, so it only makes sense to keep you guessing as to what his problem might be.

After all, you should be able to tell us what’s wrong without us having to tell you if you love us. You need to be able to ascertain and address the problem because we expect that level of telepathy and second-guessing.

The Mid-Ranger can’t tell you what’s wrong, because just like the youngest, he doesn’t know, but he knows right away that it’s about you. So he wants you to work it out and solve the problem and he won’t give you any input, so why would he? He may speak in vague terms to keep the guessing game going until it leads him to dead ends and blind alleys and he gets fuel all along.

thegreatest

And as you’d expect, the greatest know very well what’s wrong. He knows that you’re at fault (because of course everything must be your fault) and that’s because you failed your turn. If you work as an efficient device it won’t feel that way.

You are not working and therefore must be punished until you finally start working again. Note that this does not mean that you identify and solve the problem, but rather that you begin to save fuel, comply with the demands of the Highest and submit to His control.

The elder will never tell you what the problem is. Doing so would mean providing the enemy with classified information and this could not happen. Telling you that you’re not working out and that you’re undermining his sense of control will be like conceding more control to you.

Our sense of caution would prevent us from publishing such information. Instead, as part of taking back control, the Greater One knows that getting you squirting fuel and begging him to talk to you is part of the game that needs to be played. He is superior and does not work to give you an idea of his dark mind.

You are there to pull your strings and he will be happy to do the same and keep you in the dark and upset and begging him to talk to you. He may embark on long but ultimately meaningless monologues, musings, and expressions, but it’s all done just to tie you into yet another knot.

Realize that it is happening and now you understand why.

Ask once what’s wrong. Don’t expect to receive an answer or if you do, don’t expect it to be informative or helpful. However, you have fulfilled your obligations by asking us about the problem.

Understand that repeatedly asking us about it is just refueling and allowing us to take back control. If you keep asking, we’re going to continue the game of not telling you. Once we see the fuel flow, we want it to keep flowing.

Instead, ask, and if you don’t get an answer or an answer that doesn’t make sense, just say:

“Well, I’m sure you’ll tell me when you’re ready.”

Then walk away.

You don’t refuel, so we didn’t split the “blood” so there’s no feeding frenzy. Your comment is not a criticism that you have allowed us to entrust power to us by leaving the decision with us.

You can then continue with whatever you want to do. Yes, you will be accused of not caring, but don’t fight back. Yes, you will likely face more pressure to get the fuel out of you, but stay away from us, or if you can’t engage in a different task, and if you feel the need to say something, just state in a neutral way.

“I asked and I understand you’ll let me know when you decide you want it. That’s fine.”

By asking once, leaving the decision with us, and restating that situation (if necessary) neither encouraging fuel frenzy nor hurting us, the certain manipulation allied with not telling you what’s wrong will fade away. You will have saved yourself the anxiety, energy stress, and anxiety.