I know you’re all dying to know what that is, but let me explain.

You’ve met someone who’s perfect. For you, they have no flaws. Their charm is there, and so is their easy-going way of understanding you.

There’s no need to worry, right?

Here I assure you…

…not everything may be as it seems.

If you’re dealing with a narcissist, you’ll find out if you ask them this question.

The Mask

The narcissist’s mask appears as soon as you meet them. You see, they wear it all the time, wanting to impress, disguise themselves, or deceive you. If you’re in a public place, then…

Related : This 3-Word Text Makes Every Narcissist Panic

What I must remind you of sometimes is that you may recognize them after a while without their mask.

This usually happens behind closed doors, or without anyone else in sight or earshot.

They disappear, and you see the person behind them. You no longer see this nice person, you just see a nice act.

The mask is essential to the narcissist. Without it, they wander around living their toxic lives, showing everyone how awful they are.

Without their masks, narcissists become a walking warning sign.

However?

Well… they can fool anyone.

Behind This Mask…

Where Do I Start?

This is a high-level personality inconsistency, and it begins with a flare-up.

After this flare-up, you’re likely to find someone who is impatient, expects nothing but perfection from you, and will only love you in their condition.

They’ll ignore you for no reason. Plus, they’ll enjoy watching you suffer while they meet you with nothing to offer you.

Related : 13 Things Narcissists Do That Make You Look And Feel Stupid

It’s hard to even comprehend, isn’t it? It’s impossible for the same person to be so different depending on who they’re with and where they’re at.

Why Hide?

If you meet a naturally narcissistic person, it’s impossible for any of us to be attracted to them.

Can you imagine greeting them and hearing them tell you that you’re a worthless person who no one else likes?

You’d be gone faster than you thought!

But they’re not, and that’s the problem. They want your attention and affection before they reveal who they are.

They want you to fall in love with them, and they want you to prove that you’re not going anywhere.

So… What’s the question?

I know this sounds crazy for someone to ask, but trust me when I say it always works.

Do you think you’re a narcissist?

In my field, I’ve known people ask this question of narcissists they know, and they’ve never approached them.

This has always been the trigger for problems that ultimately lead to a breakup, and I think it’s pretty obvious why.

Imagine asking a question like this, a question that proves you see beyond the narcissist.

It simply means: “You know I’ve been thinking about this for a long time, and I’m pretty sure you’re not who you’re making yourself out to be. Would you like to clarify?”

Does the narcissist want to clarify? What do you think?

I think any honest explanation is an admission of a toxic personality. In a way, and I’ll explain, I don’t expect that to ever happen.

Hey, if you can prove me wrong, let me know!

Have you ever received a true confession from a narcissist?

Related : Why Do Narcissists Stare At You While You Sleep?

Hey. You know what? I think I might be a narcissist. You’re right. All this time I’ve been trying to make you feel bad, when in fact, I’m the one who feels that way and hates myself. I’m so sorry for everything I’ve caused you.

Yes – pigs can fly!

What Happens When I Ask?

One of two things will happen if you ask this burning question.

The first is always: Did they laugh and actually say yes? In that case, you’re dealing with someone who doesn’t care about anyone or anything… Run!

The second is defensiveness. What you’ll initially see is a mild look of horror and panic. You’re touching on a topic that’s very close to the narcissist, and you’ve been very open about it, too.

Then come the consequences.

The moments, hours, or days that follow will be the real proof. I’d like to see a narcissist who’s been asked this question continue their relationship with that person as before. Or has something changed?

I guarantee they have. They’ve distanced themselves from him, or they’re avoiding seeing him.

They may be giving him the silent treatment as a form of punishment for his boldness.

What if he suddenly has a new friend—or, say, a source of support? Suddenly, you step back as he offers a new ally.

For the narcissist, you asked the question, so you must have suspicions that he is indeed a narcissist.

Reveal: What Every Narcissist Fears

One of my clients once told me something I’ll never forget. He said:

Alexander, I had suspicions about my husband for about two years. I’d been watching him, and it was as if the pieces of the puzzle had fallen into place.

As soon as I confirmed it, I asked him directly: Do you think you’re a narcissist?

Everything changed. He got so angry that he threw me to the ground, then told me I was trying to find a problem in the relationship because I hated him.

Related : These Are The Most Horrible Things Narcissists Do To You

I protested that wasn’t the case, that I just wanted a conversation. I thought I could help him overcome his negative traits. All I wanted was to be by his side.

That physical assault confirmed this for me—and that was the day my life changed forever.

I left the house that evening when he went to the gym, and I stayed with my sister for about seven months until the divorce was finalized and I was able to find my own small apartment.

It’s not a big deal, and I’m literally starting over. But I don’t care.

I’d rather start over on my own than live with him for the rest of my life.

Do you feel that? Does it resonate with you?

If you’re asking someone if they’re a narcissist, you have a good reason. The right person is the one who will want to, and rightly so, talk to you about it.