You’ve met a narcissist.

They took your breath away.

They made you laugh until you cried.

They promised you a safe space.

They guided you through your fears, telling you they would always support and love you.

Then the world they built for you to live in collapsed before you could even move in.

What is it? What is the one reason empaths can’t just cut narcissists out of their lives indefinitely?

I’m here with the answer.

Empath – The Fixer

It’s not your job to fix people, is it?

I know you know that, but if you’re an empath, the urge to keep doing it will take over.

The logical part of your brain that makes you see yourself being taken advantage of will hide beneath the thick layers of a desire to serve and love those who greedily accept.

Empaths find their purpose in helping others, because that’s where they’ve been taught from an early age to look for love.

Related : 8 Ways To Ruin The Narcissists Life Without Even Trying

This usually means neglectful parents who offered little warmth when their child did something good, helpful, or loving.

This is known as conditional love if you don’t know the formal terms.

Love is only shown under certain circumstances.

Of course, love is so hard to come by that they spend their entire lives trying to earn it, like wages at work. At this point, any love will do, so they take the smallest amount and cherish it.

They Always Want Someone To Help Them

This pattern applies to empaths as a whole – narcissists are always looking for someone to help them. This might look like this:

Making themselves look better (the family-oriented person, the ideal partner, the loving and thoughtful spouse). They need a partner to prove that they can offer these things to others, while being seen as generous and compassionate.

They like to have someone they can use to their own advantage. This can be in times of wrong, when they need frequent instances of forgiveness. Only a certain type of person will do this – someone who only sees the good in people. Those with big hearts are quick to say, “It’s okay; I know you didn’t mean it.”

People who want someone to care for others will always put their own needs aside so they can help the narcissist. This usually means that at the click of a finger, the empath comes running. This is where narcissists see themselves most clearly—when they need them.

Related : 11 Ways Narcissists Slowly Convince You To Hate Yourself

If you see the best in a narcissist, you’re paying attention to those fleeting moments when they can offer you bits of affection that don’t go deep enough to be real, but for you, they will. Narcissists need these people so they can always avoid going deeper.

Need To Be Wanted

This is why empaths struggle to let go of narcissists:

Narcissists will always need empaths, and empaths will always need narcissists.

The relationship dynamic has many problems, but these problems stem from the fact that narcissists only thrive when someone else depends on them.

When it comes to empaths, they depend on narcissists like they depend on a job. They work hard and diligently. The only difference is that there’s no paycheck at the end of each day.

The only pay is paid to the person who watches them work!

So how do you know if you’re an empath?

I have five immediate ways you can tell:

1 You’re told you’re overly sensitive

As if that’s a bad thing, right? Well, at least that’s how the narcissist portrays it to you.

Sensitivity is actually a talent that not enough people have.

The ability to be in tune with other people’s emotions.

Sparking helpful, empathetic people who reach out and offer support.

Sensitivity is a kind of superpower. It means you can feel.

Related : The Hard Truth: Why You Stay in an Abusive Relationship

Narcissists can’t do that. Even a fraction of the time. They need your sensitivity even if it seems like a problem to them, and that’s what makes you feel like they need you.

2 You Pick Up the Energies Around You

Empaths pick up on all the energies around them. They may not like this side of themselves, but it’s part of why narcissists love them.

If they can read the empath, they can dictate how their behavior resonates with them.

If you’re ignored for no reason, you’ll pick up on something that’s wrong, and you’ll use that suspicion to question the narcissist.

What did you do wrong?

How can you fix it?

Narcissists love that attention, but empaths won’t want to let go until they make that fix.

3 You’re Sensitive to Other People’s Feelings

Continuing from point 2, if you’re sensitive to a narcissist’s feelings, they can wrap you around their little finger.

You don’t want to give up on them, because you think you’re the solution to their problems. You hope that your warmth and love will melt their cold hearts, so you wait forever to see if that’s possible.

Related : 10 Things Narcissism is, and What it’s Not!

It’s never going to happen, but that’s why you can never give up on them.

4 You Feel It’s Your Duty to Help Others

You’ll always be ready to offer help, but you’ll never give the narcissist anything they need, even if they ask for help.

Nothing will ever be good enough—but you’ll find that out the hard way.

You can spend years trying to please them, but you’ll never hit the jackpot. They’ll just keep finding ways to complain about you, to you, which will chip away at your self-esteem.

You want help, because you’ve learned that to receive love, you have to give help.

5 You get tired easily, and need regular recharging

Narcissists aren’t the only reason you’re tired all the time, but they will test you to your limits and beyond by creating unnecessary drama and conflict to wear you down.

And so you inevitably get tired. It’s exhausting to have to try to please someone who is never happy. The more you need to recharge, the more they’ll pressure you, but in those moments of pressure, they can intermittently unleash their magic.

It’s enough to keep you hooked, even when you’re drained of all your energy, a toxic balance that all narcissists know how to manipulate.

*Related : Things Narcissists Say to Justify Their Behavior

When you’re really tired, they seem to take on a helpful, supportive role and will do whatever they can to get you back on track.

And then?

It all starts over again.