Oh, they love it, don’t they? Narcissists love winning every argument they get into.

They enter every argument with a strategic plan to make themselves look good, and you look like the total loser who gets the blame.

When does a narcissist realize they’ve won? How does that moment go from zero to 100?

Oh, they have a favorite way of doing it, that’s for sure. And I know it’ll blow your mind when you read it!

The Magic Mix

No, I’m not talking about your favorite takeout (although I wish it were that simple).

I want to delve into the vast world of narcissism and introduce you to another combination you may not be familiar with.

Related : The 7 Things Narcissists Are Most Afraid Of

Manipulation and psychological manipulation, when combined, make up the narcissist.

Think of it this way: a narcissist always wants to win.

They can’t stand the thought of giving in to your success, so when it comes to an argument, they’ll be ready to throw you a double verbal punch to win.

I know they don’t deserve this victory, and you don’t deserve to suffer it.

But since I’m interested in helping you, I want to show you their tricks so you can overcome them on your own.

1 Manipulation

First, there’s manipulation.

What is manipulation?

When someone wants to be invisible and control your influence on something for their own benefit, they’ll take full advantage of you.

The goal is to confuse you, right? So narcissists will try anything in hopes of success.

If one is more effective than the other, expect more of them.

As long as you suffer and they watch with complete satisfaction, that’s all they care about.

Types_of_Manipulation:

Manipulation isn’t exactly obvious, which is why it’s a common tactic for narcissists.

They never want to appear to be abusing you, but they’ll do it anyway.

Under the guise of manipulation, narcissists almost always get what they want (until you catch them).

• Mind Games
• Guilt
• False Delusions
• False Claims
• Lying
• Deception
• Psychological Manipulation
• Outright Lying
• The Silent Treatment

Do any of these things sound familiar to you? What are the ways the narcissist has manipulated you in your life, and have they used any of the above methods to upset you?

There is no gentle way to manipulate, and it’s a behavior most emotionally healthy of us avoid.

Personally, I don’t see any benefit in using these powers to negatively influence someone, but I’m not a narcissist.

How a Narcissist Uses Manipulation to Win Every Argument

If you’re trying to defend yourself or confront the reality of your abuse, the narcissist will want to put you down.

They won’t tolerate you raising your voice, so what they do next is use any manipulative tactic to escalate the situation.

Related : Divorcing The Female Narcissist, Borderline, or other Abuser

Do they want to silence you? Provoke you? Confuse you? Force you to apologize? Instill doubt? Guilt?

I bet they’ll do everything.

Why are you yelling at me? I just want to help you.

You’re being so aggressive right now.

No wonder we can’t fix anything and you keep crying.

Why do you seem so determined to destroy our relationship?

Whenever we fight, a faint smile appears on your face.

What do these phrases do?

They’ll make you stop and think, “Oh my God, I think I’m the problem here.”

2 Emotional Manipulation

Ding, ding! You’ve all heard of emotional manipulation. Hearing it and understanding it are two different things, so let’s start with what it actually is.

What is Emotional Manipulation?

If I intentionally upset you to the point of tears, how would you feel?

I think you’d feel very depressed.

You might think I’m a bad person, and you’d be right. I shouldn’t upset you in any way.

The same goes for relationships.

No one should upset the other.

Even worse is when you turn around and say to them, through their tears:

I don’t know what’s bothering you so much.

You’re so sensitive.

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I was just kidding. How can you take this seriously?

You’re fine.

I think you’re making a big deal out of it.

Why all the drama?

Your face changes. After all this, the narcissist doesn’t apologize for a moment. In fact, they try to make you the problem by blaming you or trying to minimize your feelings.

They try to steal your reality and replace it with their own narrative.

We all know that the narcissist only likes their own version and sees it as the only one worthy of attention.

No wonder this causes conflict, and no wonder the narcissist always wins.

Let’s take a look at other types of psychological manipulation.

Types of Psychological Manipulation:

Doubting your memory of events even though you remember correctly.

Telling you you’re crazy or have a vivid imagination.

Denying any promises they’ve made to you.

Minimizing your problems or fears, telling you you’re wrong.

Pretending not to understand what you’re saying, even though you’re perfectly clear.

Pretending not to remember what happened, and not believing you when you tell them.

Anyone who’s been repeatedly psychologically manipulated will feel like they’re banging their head against a wall.

See how their comments might make you scream and shout at them?

Listen to me, I’m telling the truth!

They’ll laugh and continue to psychologically manipulate you until you give in and they win.

How a Narcissist Uses Psychological Manipulation to Win Every Argument

Imagine a large cola bottle, and quickly, drop a mint into it to make the cola explode, like in those fun science experiments you see.

Related : How To Outsmart A Narcissist In Any Conversation: 7 Tips

Okay, imagine yourself as a cola bottle. The narcissist is the one who drops the mints, and the mints are the psychological manipulation comments.

One by one, they drop, drop, drop.

Then suddenly, even if you didn’t want to, you find yourself getting out of that bottle, fast and furious.

That’s how they win. They know you’ll explode. They know they’ll win.

It’s time to unscrew the cap and keep your bottle closed.

You no longer have to be the participant.