Why do narcissists get married? And why do they often rush into remarriage?

How can someone with a history of cheating and lying, who lacks empathy and compassion, and has proven to have no desire to keep their promises… get married again?

Narcissists often rush into marriage and then remarry. If narcissists are afraid of intimacy and commitment, why and what might make them want to get married so quickly?

Is there something in the narcissist’s mind about the “new source” that makes them more susceptible to such a drastic move?

Why do narcissists get married?

Motivation to get married

First, narcissists always have motives. When a narcissist rushes into a relationship and remarries quickly, you can rest assured that there is something in it for them.

It could be money, fame, friends, assets, power, or control – there is always something in it for them. Always!

SelfImage

Secondly, narcissists are always concerned with their image and narcissists need people more than the average person.

Narcissists have very specific reasons for being in relationships, but their reasons do not reflect the universal need that most of us have – love.

Narcissists do not enter or stay in relationships for love.

They enter relationships to ensure that their needs are met and to obtain narcissistic supply.

Attention

Furthermore, narcissists are addicted to attention. Securing it is their dominant drive.

If their “new source” provides them with the ability to obtain what they could not achieve on their own, they will do everything in their power to secure it as a permanent source of narcissistic supply.

There is almost nothing a narcissist will not do if they believe it will bring them fame.

For them, there is no such thing as bad publicity. Any publicity is good publicity, even through marriage.

Do Narcissists Marry Quickly?

An additional point to make is that the narcissist considers himself special and that no one understands him.

He feels that he is unique and rare while most other humans are ordinary.

Therefore, the narcissist will only associate with others of high status or intellect, because he feels that only these people can understand him.

Thus, the narcissist evaluates whether he wants to develop a relationship with someone based on their usefulness.

How useful a person is to him is the measure of his worth. He chooses his friends and partner(s) based on how much they can help him get attention or achieve his goals.

It is not uncommon to find that when the narcissist remarries someone younger to promote his self-image as younger.

Depending on how “worthy” the victim is of getting his goal will also depend on how quickly the narcissist moves into their relationship.

In fact, the narcissist chooses to develop relationships only with those who are perceived as superior, attractive, or unique in some way.

By associating with others who attract attention, he ensures that he will never run short of narcissistic supply.

TheNarcissist and the Unstable Mind

Since he has no complete control over the quantity and quality of narcissistic supply, it is bound to fluctuate.

The narcissist’s view of himself and his world is unstable accordingly. As “public opinion” fluctuates, the narcissist’s self-confidence, self-esteem, and sense of self-worth, or in other words, his self, fluctuates.

The narcissistic personality is unstable in every dimension.

It is the ultimate hybrid: rigidly formless, rigidly malleable, and dependent on the opinion of those whom the narcissist devalues.

Related : How Long Does it Take For a Narcissist to Show Their True Colors?

The narcissist’s instability is omnipresent and highly dominant—arguably the only stable trait he possesses is his instability.

The narcissist does everything with one goal in mind: attracting narcissistic supply (attention).

He does not ask what he can do for the world—but what the world can do for him in terms of narcissistic supply.

He falls in love with people, places of work, residences, professions, hobbies, and interests and turns away from them—because they seem to provide more or less narcissistic supply and for no other reason.

It is not uncommon to find chaos and instability in the “career narcissist.” This narcissist marries, divorces, and remarries with astonishing speed.

Everything in his life is in a state of flux: friends, affections, judgments, values, beliefs, place of residence, affiliations, even hobbies.

Everything, except his work. His career is his only place of stability. The career narcissist is often cruel, demanding, and abusive…and very successful.