We may read great self-help books and have wisdom about relationships, but many of us still struggle with toxicity.

We are afraid to speak up and confront those who produce toxic feelings and are even more afraid of leaving a romantic relationship, friendship, or job because of toxicity.

Toxicity appears in many forms; Some of the worst expressions of it come from individuals who appear bright and nice on the outside. This can be an illusion, things are not always as they appear, and neither are people.

The five types of toxic people usually include personality traits, but they can be hidden behind an outwardly successful and nice person. As a result, spotting the signs of a toxic person is not always easy.

Relationship toxicity is something an author and friend of mine experienced firsthand, which led to her passion for communicating about this topic. she writes:

“I had all the tools to avoid a toxic relationship, but I entered into an emotionally and mentally toxic relationship with someone who seemed to have it all – a great family, a prestigious education, a successful career, and a seemingly nice personality. I quickly realized that this was just a facade. I learned how deep the toxicity runs and why it’s so hard to escape the emotional and mental torture when someone looks “perfect” on the outside.

As the saying goes, “Beauty is just an outward appearance.” I learned the importance of recognizing toxic relationships and friendships and how to deal with these types of relationships. I have learned to get rid of the bad people in my life and appreciate those who bring positivity. In the end, I had become a stronger person in all capacities, even though it required being dragged through what seemed like endless amounts of darkness.

Whether it’s cutting ties with a friendship, romantic partner, family member, or co-worker, most of us can feel overwhelmed by a toxic person.

Of course, there are more than five types of toxic people, but the ones below are among the most common. These faces can overlap and two or more faces may occur simultaneously.

If you’re in a relationship with someone who has any of these traits, it might be wise to spend some time thinking about how you feel when you’re around that person.

Here are the 5 most dangerous types of toxic people – and how to get them out of your life:

The critic

Have you ever been in a relationship where you feel judged and criticized no matter what you do? Criticism is different from advice and it is important to understand the difference.

Consider tardiness: it can get in the way of your professional and personal relationships, and most of us consider it a negative trait. However, everyone has personal kinks to work out and we all make mistakes.

Imagine arriving 15 minutes late for dinner without giving your partner any warning. Your partner seems visibly angry, and instead of asking you why you’re late or what happened, he automatically starts insulting you: “You’re always late and you have no regard for anyone but yourself. I’ve been sitting here for 15 minutes waiting for you, and no matter what happens, it doesn’t seem That you can show up on time at all.

This is a perfect example of criticism. This partner may criticize your every move: “Are you going to wear this?” “Why don’t you ever do that…?” “What is wrong with you?” The list goes on and on. You feel belittled and believe that you can never do anything right, no matter how hard you try.

Now, imagine arriving 15 minutes late for dinner without giving your partner any warning. Your partner seems visibly angry, but instead of criticizing, he questions the pattern. “I realize you’re late often. Is there a reason? Has anyone else noticed this trend before?” This is an individual trying to inquire as to why this maladaptive pattern occurs. Instead of blaming their partner, they can blame the action.

A critic can bring a lot of toxicity to a relationship. Critics may never call you names, but they may constantly insult your beliefs, appearance, and ideas, often because they have low self-esteem and want to be in control.

Instead of trying to make suggestions to improve your bad habits, they find every excuse to berate these habits and hold you back as a person. The critic criticizes the person rather than the behavior.

The most damaging experience anyone can have is when a parent says, “You’re a bad boy or girl,” instead of saying, “You did something bad.”

The passive aggressor

Passive aggression is the negative expression of anger. Common examples include repeatedly keeping you waiting or making you late for an appointment. We all know passive-aggressive people. You never know what message such a person is trying to convey.

You may feel like you are always walking on eggshells when you are around a passive-aggressive person. Denial of feelings, sarcasm, and flattery are surefire ways to know that someone is passive-aggressive.

Imagine you did something that upset your partner, but you’re not sure exactly what it was. Ask why he is angry so you can prevent upsetting your partner in the future. However, your partner will not tell you why he or she is angry and instead responds, “I’m fine” or “I’m not crazy,” even when he or she is withdrawing from you.

This makes your mind go around in circles trying to figure out what this person is thinking and why they keep sending hidden messages. You may spend hours trying to read a person’s mind while retracting their every move or word.

If a person cannot communicate directly, uses sarcasm as a defense mechanism, sends mixed messages, or acts as if nothing is wrong — aside from displaying angry emotions — you may be dealing with a passive-aggressive person.

The narcissist

The narcissist acts like he’s God’s gift to the universe, knows it all, is the best at everything, and isn’t afraid to tell you so. No matter how smart or experienced you are, you can never measure up to this person.

Like passive aggression, narcissism is a personality disorder and is toxic. The narcissist puts himself on a pedestal and looks down at you. You may feel like you are competing with this person in every situation.

Narcissists are often unwilling to compromise, lack insight and empathy, and want to be the center of attention. They may spoil special occasions, like your birthday or an important event in your career, because they always need praise, even when it’s your time to shine for someone else.

The narcissist hates himself. Narcissists have very thin skin that is easily pricked and penetrated underneath, releasing anger and hatred because their self-esteem is marginal. Narcissists are willing to destroy everything and everyone around them when they feel hurt or rejected.

Procrastinator

Procrastination refers to the act of refusing to communicate to evade a problem. Many people have probably heard of a procrastinator – a person who refuses to engage in a conversation or share feelings when important issues arise. This often makes the other person feel unimportant and unworthy of honest communication.

The objecting person may appear cold and refuse to acknowledge that there is a problem, but refusing to communicate creates negative feelings and barriers that make it difficult to foster a successful relationship. In addition, it can cause you to feel feelings of resentment and guilt.

If you’re trying to connect with someone you know well who refuses to be honest and open with you, you may want to reconsider why you’re in the relationship in the first place.

By not answering your question, the procrastinator’s lack of communication makes you frustrated and angry, because he will not engage in the expected interpersonal conversation.

Antisocial personality

Antisocial personality disorder (ASPD), as defined in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), includes sociopathy traits (thought to be caused by social conditions such as child abuse and characterized by explosive and sometimes violent behavior, but it is still assumed Possessing the capacity for empathy and remorse) and psychopathy (lack of remorse or empathy, legally exploits others, and is often involved in fraud or other white-collar crimes with various motives including greed and revenge).

We all have predispositions to different personality traits, which may be why the general public can be seduced by such people – we see ourselves, at least in part, in the behavior of antisocial personality disorder. We also forgive and welcome people with antisocial personality disorder as we have forgiven and welcomed ourselves – a Judeo-Christian and other faiths.

However, psychopaths are psychological chameleons who do the emotional part required to manipulate every situation and interaction for money, sex, power, ego gratification, etc. They are often so skilled that their victims do not realize what is happening.

This psychologically predatory behavior can only be prevented through skillful investigation of the history of pain and suffering the individual has left behind. Not surprisingly, most people don’t believe it and ignore the evidence until it’s too late. The psychopath’s “love” is an interest in control, flattery, and power, hidden beneath the cover of his book.

Here are the 5 most dangerous types of toxic people – and how to get them out of your life:

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