The familiar, attractive appeal of a narcissist, who has recently imprinted his or her charm on your heart, mind, and health, may lure you into another cycle of abuse.

They throw you into the sea without a life jacket, then bring you back to what you perceive as safety. As soon as you regain your footing, they do it again.

It’s time to learn to swim, so you don’t rely on them to make you feel worthy.

Avoiding these tricks is the best place to start!

Always Worth At Trying In Them’s Sights

Hey, if you’ve recently broken up with a narcissist, congratulations. I don’t care who started it, but I want to let you know that you have a chance to avoid falling into the “come back to me” trap.

Related : Help! I Can’t Leave The Narcissist Without Destroying My Life

For them, it’s always best to try to get back to you. Somehow, they want to be seen as the compassionate and considerate person they pretend to be, so you can welcome them back with open arms.

It’s not fair or right, but they do it for several reasons.

What do they have to lose?

It’s always been planned so far.

They know what to push.

They love watching you helplessly let them back in.

So, let’s overcome all that by highlighting their secret trick.

I want That Cycle…Again

I don’t want to see either of you fall into the cycle of abuse. That’s what’s worked so far, right? It’s how you went from being together to breaking up, to being together again, to being apart again.

And to be completely honest, part of you would love to see this cycle go again.

I don’t mean you voluntarily want to be abused, but the part of you that’s attached to the narcissist will want to be with them again. That’s why so many victims never leave their abusers. They get used to the abuse, which erodes their self-esteem. Without that self-esteem, you won’t find separation the best option.

These_Ugly_Phrases_May_Appear…

The following phrases are classic narcissistic tactics to lure you back to them.

Related : Discover the Two Shocking Indicators You’re Being Groomed by a Narcissist

Used cleverly at the right time, they make the person you’ve become controlled feel like there’s no other option.

There’s always another option.

“Remember that time when…”

The first phrase is probably used regularly. It’s a direct reference to the past—to happier times when you were in a positive, positive place together (albeit temporarily).

The narcissist wants you to reminisce about the good times you had, remembering how good your relationship was, the potential you had, how much you enjoyed their company, how happy you were, and how they activated all those feelings in your heart.

Hold on to what you know to be true.

Those moments, however wonderful they may have seemed at the time, were based on manipulation, not real feelings. They were manufactured, and you saw them as reasons to stay when things got really bad.

Reminding you of those good times is a plan designed to keep you from looking at all the bad.

If you can’t see the devastation, you won’t remember it, and you won’t care.

“I Miss You”

Some of this is true, but none of it is about you as a person.

For them, missing you means missing what they could have avoided—everything they managed to achieve under the false guise of “caring” or “love.”

“Missing you” is never about how much they love you, but how much they love the support you provide.

Without your support, they have nothing.

Don’t misinterpret their words—many do—and that’s what drives people back into abusive relationships.

“I have to be better. I can’t lose you.”

That sounds great, right? I mean, who doesn’t want to hear, “I’m going to be better. Please tell me what I need to do to keep from losing you”?

Related : Exposed: The Top 9 Biggest Lies About Narcissists

Well, it all depends on the context. You need to be aware of repeated and intentional mistakes and how they can affect you and cause significant harm to your well-being.

If you’re in a relationship and your spouse makes a serious mistake for which they can demonstrate remorse, that’s your decision, and a completely different matter.

Narcissists aren’t like that. They create their own problems, then inflict them on innocent people who beg for forgiveness.

What?

You forgive, and they do it again.

“I hate bothering you”

You can’t intentionally hurt someone else while simultaneously feeling bad about it.

And I want you to remember this the next time a narcissist begs and pleads with you, telling you how much they hate seeing you upset.

Because they’re the ones who caused it.

Ultimately, they have the choice to keep you safe or keep you stuck.

Don’t let it be the last.

“Don’t leave me”

Narcissists are begging you not to leave them even though they’re afraid you’ll actually do it.

Related : You Must Never Say These 10 Things to a Narcissist

They don’t know how to explain to you that they weren’t good enough for you to try it again.

Instead, they do their best to keep you, starting with the simple phrase:

Don’t leave me.

“If you leave, I’ll have nothing to live for.”

Departing from the previous point, psychopathic narcissists use this phrase to intimidate and frighten their victims.

Yes, it temporarily gives the victim the ability to believe they have some influence over the narcissist’s decision to live or die.

Victims—unaccustomed to such responsibility—suddenly rush to the narcissist’s aid. They don’t want anything bad to happen to them, because, at the end of the day, they’re still good, kind people.

“INEVER STOP LOVING YOU”

You didn’t start either…

And I know you think it was love. They told you it was love. But those are just words.

Related : The Number One Reason Why Empaths Struggle To Let Go of Narcissists

You can’t believe anyone who uses only words. Actions reveal the truth, so if you have any doubt about someone else’s feelings, watch what they do, not what they say.

Change Yourself To Get Over This

The most important thing is the inner work that will change your view of narcissists.

They are not the people you need to protect and support you. They will strip you of what’s good and replace it with uncertainty and self-doubt.

If you want to overcome this ordeal and ensure that the narcissist will never return, there are boundaries you must set and adhere to.

I believe you can do it!