There are some people who only take from others, and choose to be entitled and arrogant all their lives. Such toxic or self-centered people demand and expect too much from others, without doing anything in return. This article will talk in detail about the signs of people who only take and give nothing.
the main points
People who demand too much from others have high self-esteem with anxiety and are incompetent at self-care.
Recipients face a higher mortality rate than those in give-and-take relationships.
Expecting too much from others is something that is learned in early childhood. It becomes a fixed aspect of personality.
People who expect too much from others may be described as narcissists, and expect unlimited admiration and attention from others. The Oxford Learner’s Dictionary defines narcissism as “an excessive preoccupation with oneself and one’s own needs…often at the expense of [understanding] [the needs of] others”.
We may view these people as getting all the good things in relationships because they are the ones who make the decisions and have their wants and needs met by others. But there are downsides to people who take too much from others in relationships. There are also other traits that go along with being a taker.
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People who just take from you: 11 signs of toxic people in relationships
- Arrogant attitude
Takers arrogantly expect others to give to them as if that were the goal of other people in relationships, as Martin and Adams cite. They are not complaining about accepting help. They are ungrateful. They are rarely grateful for help.
They feel they deserve everything they get from others, and usually want more. They do not expect to reciprocate by giving to others. Their focus is only on receiving. This leaves their relationships unbalanced.
- Inflated sense of self-worth
Somewhat paradoxically, people who expect to please others may have high self-esteem. They often think they are wonderful, highly accomplished people, even though they may be untalented and unskilled, with little effort on their part, look no further than Martin and Adams. - Focus on personal desires
People who excel at receiving support from others focus too much on personal desires, similar to a horse wearing blinders. They often have little perspective on what others need or want.
According to Dambrun and Ricard, their happiness and emotional stability fluctuate rather than remain constant with this constant personal focus.
- Little concern for others
Blair finds that self-centered people often show little compassion for others. This explains their lack of consideration for the needs and desires of others and their weak response to others’ distress. - Expect others to solve their problems
Takers are good at absolving themselves of responsibility in solving their own problems. Why try to fix something yourself when you can expect and ask someone else to step up and do it for you?
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- Take a little responsibility
Recipients are often irresponsible and show little responsibility, either to themselves or to others. They shift responsibility onto other people who are especially good at taking responsibility for them.
For example, they may expect the husband to be fully responsible for the children while maintaining a hands-off approach to child-rearing.
- Feelings of inadequacy toward self-care
Because self-centered people are so good at getting care from others, they are lousy at self-care. They may feel anxious and inadequate at the idea of doing things that take care of themselves. - High mortality rate
Chen et al. It studied the risks of all-cause mortality in people who “disproportionately receive social support—[they receive] more social support than they give.” They found a higher mortality rate in this group compared to people who give and take emotional support.
They speculated that high “support from others may make individuals feel indebted to and dependent on others…” These “…low levels of perceived control…” are often associated with a higher risk of many physical diseases, especially cardiovascular diseases. . Pathological emotional reciprocity poses a risk to survival when compared to people who enjoy more balanced reciprocity in their relationships.
- Enjoy relying on others
People who are good at taking do not avoid helping others, nor are they independent in their self-directed actions. They like to be in a subordinate role as others provide them with emotional and physical care.
- Early learning
Martin and Adams found that children showed self-preoccupation and trait acquisition by the age of three. Usually, parents are overly concerned with these children, anticipating problems and solving the problems the children face, instead of allowing the children to solve the problems on their own.
These children show behavioral problems at an early age, as they have tantrums and become aggressive when they do not get what they want.
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- Psychological and mental disorders
Addiction can occur in impotent, self-centered people who feel and act helpless in relationships – drug abuse, gambling, sexual addiction. Carter et al. Al compared normative youth to youth who use drugs.
They discovered that drug users showed higher levels of narcissism, entitlement, and self-centeredness. In extreme cases, according to Blair, psychopathy, with a severe lack of empathy for others, can occur in a minority of narcissists and pathologists.