A profound shift occurs as we age. We begin to value solitude more, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
This shift can be subtle, with certain behaviors emerging that indicate we’re starting to prefer our own company.
People who increasingly enjoy being alone as they age often exhibit these eight behaviors. Identifying these signs isn’t about isolating ourselves, it’s about understanding this evolution in our preferences.
Here are the behaviors to help you identify this shift in yourself or others.
1) Valuing quality over quantity in relationships
As we age, our social circles often get smaller. But this isn’t a sign of loneliness—quite the opposite.
When we’re younger, we tend to surround ourselves with friends, acquaintances, and even temporary relationships. The more people, the better—right?
But as we get older, our perspective changes. We begin to realize that what matters is not the number of people in our lives, but the quality of the relationships we have.
People who prefer solitude as they age often value deep, meaningful relationships and don’t feel the need to fill their lives with superficial or fleeting relationships.
So, if you notice someone choosing fewer, but closer relationships, it could be an indication that they’re finding more comfort in their own company. But remember, this isn’t a negative thing. It’s just a matter of developing preferences as we journey through life.
2) Appreciate Personal Rituals
Something I’ve noticed in myself, and in others who start to enjoy being alone more as they get older, is developing personal rituals.
Let me share a personal example. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve started to look forward to Sunday afternoons. It’s my “me” time. I’ll make a cup of my favorite tea, sit in my favorite window chair, and read a book for a few hours.
Rituals may seem simple, but they’re something I cherish deeply. They’re my time to relax, reflect, and recharge—something I prefer to do alone.
Like me, many people who increasingly prefer their own company are starting to develop these personal rituals. It can be anything from a morning walk to an hour dedicated to crafting. These rituals give structure and meaning to our alone time and are a clear sign that solitude is being embraced.
3) Increased Creativity
One of the most interesting behaviors that people who enjoy their solitude exhibit is increased creativity. It’s no coincidence, either. There’s a correlation between spending time alone and having the mental space for creative ideas to flourish.
Research shows that solitude can boost creativity and lead to self-discovery. This may explain why some of the world’s greatest artists, writers, and thinkers often seek solitude to produce their best work.
So, if you notice someone spending more time alone and channeling their energy into creative pursuits, they’re likely finding comfort and inspiration in their solitude.
4) Embracing Slow Living
As we get older and start to appreciate our solitude more, we often start to embrace the concept of slow living. This is a lifestyle that emphasizes taking time to enjoy life’s simple pleasures and not rushing through our days.
People who prefer to be alone may start taking longer walks, spending more time preparing meals, or simply enjoying a quiet morning with a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. They don’t rush from one social event to the next; instead, they take the time to be mindful and present in their daily lives.
Living a slower life often goes hand in hand with solitude, as both allow us to step back from the hustle and bustle of life and truly appreciate the moment. If you notice this behavior in someone, it could be a sign that they find joy in their own company.
5) Demonstrating Self-Sufficiency
There is something incredibly powerful about being self-sufficient, especially as we age. It’s a trait that often goes hand in hand with a preference for solitude.
Being able to handle things on our own, whether it’s fixing a leaky faucet, cooking a meal, or navigating a new city, gives us a sense of confidence and independence. Feeling comfortable in our solitude doesn’t mean we avoid people; it just means that we are secure enough to rely on ourselves.
For many people, this self-sufficiency is a source of pride. It’s a true affirmation of their ability to stand on their own two feet. So if you notice someone becoming more self-reliant as they age, it could be a sign that they’re finding comfort and fulfillment in their solitude.
6) Appreciating Silence
Over time, I’ve realized that silence isn’t empty; it’s filled with answers.
When I was younger, I filled every moment with noise—music, chatter, the TV playing in the background. But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to appreciate quiet moments.
Now, there’s something incredibly peaceful about sitting in silence, whether watching the sunrise, meditating, or just taking a moment to breathe. These quiet moments alone have become a sanctuary for me, a place to reflect and meditate.
If you notice someone starting to appreciate silence and seeking quiet moments for themselves, they’ve likely become more comfortable in solitude. The peace and clarity that comes from these quiet moments can be truly transformative.
7) Prioritize Self-Care
As we get older and learn to enjoy our own company more, we often start to prioritize self-care. It’s about recognizing our needs and making time to care for ourselves.
Self-care can manifest in many ways. It could be maintaining a regular exercise routine, making time to read a book, choosing healthy foods, or simply making sure we get enough sleep.
People who prefer to be alone often understand the importance of taking care of their physical and mental health. They know that taking care of themselves is crucial to their overall happiness and productivity.
So, if you see someone spending more time on self-care activities, it could be an indication that they are finding contentment in solitude. It’s a sign that they are making their well-being a priority, which is great.
8) Finding Joy in Their Own Company
The most important behavior that people who prefer to be alone exhibit as they age is finding genuine joy in their own company.
They aren’t alone just because they have to, or because they are avoiding others. They genuinely enjoy it. They look forward to the time they have to be alone, whether it’s pursuing a hobby, exploring nature, or just sitting quietly with their thoughts.
The ability to find happiness within yourself is a powerful thing. It signifies a deep level of self-acceptance and contentment. If someone you know exhibits this behavior, rest assured, they are not alone. They are likely experiencing a deep sense of peace and fulfillment in their solitude.
The bottom line: Embracing change
Human behavior is a complex fabric woven from threads of personal experiences, beliefs, and biological factors. As we age, this fabric evolves, reflecting changes in our preferences and behaviors.
Solitude, often misunderstood as loneliness or isolation, can be a profound source of peace and contentment. The shift toward solitude is not a sudden leap but a gradual process, characterized by the eight behaviors we discussed.
As we age, we begin to value quality over quantity in relationships, cherish personal rituals, embrace slow living, and find joy in our own company. These are all signs that a person is finding solace in solitude.
It’s not about isolating ourselves from the world, it’s about understanding our evolving preferences, embracing them, and finding contentment in our solitude.
Ultimately, finding comfort in solitude as we age is not a sign of loneliness or disconnection. Instead, it’s a testament to our growth and development as individuals.
The important thing is to recognize these changes within ourselves and others without judgment or anxiety. Everyone’s journey is different, and for some of us, that journey leads to finding peace and fulfillment in our own company. The key is to embrace this change and see it for what it is—a natural part of our life’s journey.